Win A Lot, NewsRevue Lyric, 26 February 1995

The lottery started and needed a lyric. I tried. I’m not sure I succeeded.

I think you need to know that the UK lottery is operated by a company named Camelot for this lyric to work at all.

WIN A LOT
(To the Tune of “Camelot”)

VERSE 1

Large lotteries were banned a while ago here,
To stop us betting everything we’ve got;
But now there’s mega-profits that could flow here,
From Camelot.

VERSE 2

Accounting firms who framed the deal made packets,
Consultancies have earned an awful lot;
Solicitors have got in on the racket,
They planned the lot.

MIDDLE EIGHT 1

Punt a lot, Camelot,
My tickets lost again;
Camelot, damn the lot!,
The problem’s Number 10.

VERSE 3

The razzmatazz has sure failed to delight us,
Noel Edmunds and his cronies should be shot;
More likely Necrotising Faciitis,
Than win a lot.

MIDDLE EIGHT 2

Win a lot, win a lot?
This country’s going to the dogs;
Gamble lots, Camelot,
Like Irish, Greeks and Frogs.

OUTRO

They say they’ll donate loads to worthy causes,
And half the take in prizes reappears;
But they won’t have forgot, the most auspicious lot,
By far the biggest winner of the year is Camelot.

Here is Richard Burton chatting his way through the Camelot song, with the lyric on the screen:

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