Lottaria, NewsRevue Song, 1 September 1995

What this lyric lacks in subtlety it makes up for with…perhaps it doesn’t.

Pretty sure it was never used, although I like the sentiment and it is a good lyric, I feel.

(To the Tune of “Rockaria”)


I’m imploring the lottery,
The opera house needs all your cash.


Just got back from the Covent Garden,
Where the Opera House won pots,
And the staff’s already startin’,
To spend it;
Yeh yeh yeh they can spend it,
Eighty million they’ll spend it,
And a bunch of toffs get plusher seats.

Big chubby lady sings like a songbird,
So she’ll milk the Opera House for all it is worth,
Cos she’s greedy,
Yeh yeh yeh she is greedy,
Loadsamoney she’s greedy,
So fat that she takes up three seats.


She’d cheat on Wagner,
I think she’d lie for Beethoven,
She loves the way Pucchini is compromised,
And Verdi’s always bleeding subsidised.


I need ten thousand instantly,
Won’t leave my bed for any less.


And so we’re forking out for opera instead of other things,
And this subsidy ain’t over after the fat lady sings,
And the orchestra can fiddle their expenses if they choose,
And the weak and sick and homeless are again the ones to lose,
And as the stars get richer Diva’s also put on weight,
And its only hooray henries think that opera grants are great,
Cos she’s an opera singer taking home a load of dosh,
And the lottery priorities are such a load of tosh,
Cos the third world’s starving.

Here is Rockaria by ELO, with its lyrics on the screen:

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