Eton, NewsRevue Lyric, 26 November 1995

Prince Charles and Princess Diana chose to send Prince William to Eton. I chose to write this lyric.

I don’t recall it being used, but it is a quicky and my memory ain’t what it was.

Postscript: my 26 November 1995 submission letter shows this one having been used for 4-6 weeks previously, so I must have slightly tweaked the lyric then but it had been used. My cata-log shows me completing this lyric originally 19 September 1995. So there.

ETON
(To the Tune of “Beat It”)

VERSE 1

WILLIE: They tell me that I am as thick as pig shit,
Don’t ever go to Eton cos you’ll never fit;
But every boy round here is an upper class twit,
At Eton, at Eton.

WILLIE: You see the truth is no-one cares if you’re daft,
As long as you don’t mind the cannings and the graft,
And learn to shake your pals very warmly by the shaft,
At Eton, I just want to be bad

CHORUS 1

WILLIE: At Eton,
CHARLES:: Eton,
DIANA: Eton,
CHARLES: Eton,
DIANA: Rugger and fags and beatin’;
CHARLES: They’ll whip your buttocks raw to the bone,
But Eton’s more genteel than Gordonstone,

OUTRO

(Willie is being caned by Charles and Diana during the outro)

DIANA: That’s Eton
WILLIE: Oooohhhh
CHARLES: Eton
WILLIE: Oooohhhh
DIANA: Eton
WILLIE: Oooohhhh
C & D: Eton Eton
WILLIE: Oooohhhh.

Just in case you cannot remember Beat It by MIchael Jackson…or simply want to hear the song and read the lyrics…here’s Michael: