Lovely Day For A Whipping - SA at Uxbridge Day One

150 times two!

By Ged
July 5 2008

Ged Ladd describes the opening day of the Tour Match between Middlesex and South Africa. You'll learn about a glorious sunny day with relaxing cricket. But wnat on earth was going on in the whipping area and why does Ged go on about it so? The only way to solve that mystery is to read on

Lovely Day For A Whipping

Setting the Scene

Despite Diamond's sage advice about The Swakeley's, I didn't really allow enough time for the drive to Uxbridge. Actually it was Holland Park and Gypsy Corner that confounded me in the morning, while the traffic was lighter once you got past Hanger Lane and sneaking less than 90 degrees round Swakeley's was a breeze.

My spies inform me that not much happened in the first 4 overs and that South Africa "won" the toss (there were some mutterings of toss contrivance, but I'm not sure about the veracity of those rumours).

What I can report for sure is that it was a glorious day for cricket; sunshine with just a little light & fluffy cloud respite. I can also report that McKenzie had set off at reasonably high speed and that Smith had not.

Great to see Alan Richardson bowling again and looking sharp. Dave Burton also looked sharp and useful in those opening salvos.

On advice from a helpful honourary steward, I placed myself at Square Leg on the Pavillion side; sunbather's delight. There was a healthy crowd, but plenty of places to sit in whichever segment took your fancy.

Sunbather's delight it might have been but peace and quiet seekers it was not. The Athletics Stadium behind the ground had a schools sports day in full swing and we were bombarded with relentless orders being barked through the pa system. "Year 7 & 8 200 metres girls race, get ready to begin", and nagging "drink lots of water and stay in the shade whenever you can", and imploring "if you don't show up for your event your house gets no points. Even if you come last your house gets one point". Most worryingly, the occasional entreaty "year 8 and 9 boys long jump entrants to the whipping area".

McKenzie decided to go big aganist Dave Burton too soon; straight down ASBOs throat at Deep Fine Leg and McKenzie was "gonefer" a modest score. Must be kicking himself now.

Amla joined Smith and looked well shaky at first; his first burst of runs being nicks and mis-hits for four, while Smith's ambitions for the mornign seemed to be of the modest batting practice variety; he never looked in trouble but he never looked like accelerating either. Our boys were bowling with good discipline and the atmosphere was gentle. Just one down at lunch and the (admittedly not too distressing) prospect of Uxbridge CC becoming the whipping area for our boys.

Having established that the hot dogs were real sausages and not the over-processed Frankfurter variety, I snacked on one of those and pronounced it good.

As the Day Progressed

The offerings of food and beverage around the ground looked more than adequate to my eyes; usual snacks on offer in the Pavillion (agreed not special) plus the burger and hot dog station at that end. Plenty of bars. Hog Roast outlet nearer the Gatting End, Pete and Ivy's Ice Cream Van beyond that down Gatting way and more besides around the other side.

No doubt the fare on offer for the players at lunch was even more sumptuous than that described above. Big Al's spell straight after lunch was an excellent one and he got two good, proper wickets in Smith and Middlesex alumnus Kallis. All of a sudden it looked as though we might not get a whipping after all. Perhaps the other way round.

But of course it was bound to be a false dawn on that flatty against that batting line up. Amla was starting to look very assured and Prince was in the mood to keep him company for a long time.

The entreaties from the athletics event became more frenzied: "prefects, take the names of people who do not turn up to their events and those people will be dealt with on Monday", "we're coming up to the final events now and there's everything still to play for", plus oh so many references to this darned "whipping area". I have since Googled this term and can see that it is a term used at athletics meetings for the place where contestants congregate just before their events and are checked off against their event's register.

But even a morally robust citizen like myself couldn't help but muse over sudden announcements such as "sixth form javellin girls to the whipping area now, please".

Meanwhile Lawson's early spells did get a fair bit of a whipping. He's had virtually no cricket this season, so I suppose you'd expect a few full-bungers, long-hops and ill-directed pies. But against batting of the Saffers quality at Uxbridge, that was only going to achieve one thing.

Yet, despite Lawson's troubled start and Dave Burton visably struggling against the class batting, Middlesex never looked like being truly whipped. Danny Evans was bowling with good control, if not penetration. And Dawid Malan (only a part-time leggie) was only very rarely hit for a big one; he's a tremendous young prospect as a batting all-rounder in my view although we all know what can happen to part-time leggies at times.

I decided it was time for my own whippy, so I beat the crush for Pete and Ivy's and treated myself to a small 99 before tea. While doing so Amla took a knock and the game was delayed - it might have looked to the casual observer that the players saw Ged get up for a short break and resolved that the cricket must wait until his lordship had transacted his business and returned to his seat.

Setting the Sun

For some reason the authorities had not permitted perambulation at lunch (sack the committee!!) but did permit it at tea (reinstate the committee!!!). I observed a fair smattering of the usual suspects plus a relatively large contingent of South African families enjoying a glorious day out in the sun. Always a pleasure to see. One family entertained us with a game of cricket nearby, using the picnic basket as the wicket but otherise looking really rather useful. Might recruit them for my scratch charity team if I see them again.

After tea was more of the same. Prince and Amla dishing it out to some extent yet never progressing much above 4 an over and mostly staying below that benchmark.

South Africas Ashwell Prince

Regular Middlesex followers will recall that Northants set off like a train at Uxbridge - 6 an over - and continued at about 5's. So by my reckoning this was not really a whipping.

Talking of which, the Athletics event had mercifully ended reasonably early so we were left with the peace and quiet so many of us sought.

With about 5 or 6 overs to go the new ball was taken by Burton and Evans; Big Al had bowled his heart out with the old ball in the hope of a pre-new-ball breakthrough. But it wasn't to be. Amla had reached 150 (for the second tour match in a row) and Prince was nearing his ton.

Once Prince had reached his ton (and a very good one at that), Ged decided that enough was enough and rose to leave. That of course induced another proper wicket just as Ged was wending his way round in the direction of to the car park - Evans finally got Amla.

So Ged got to see one more wcket and got to see Amla at close quarters as he came off; he certainly isn't a candidate for the FBBs (Fat Bearded Bloke's) Club, but Amla certainly has an impressive strange, so I might start my own WTBB (Well-Toned Bearded Bloke's) Club, at least for Mr Amla and myself.

So I watched Abraham de Villiers (with a name like that he really ought to have a beard too) face a few balls but soon the lure of the open road was too much for me so I sneaked off before the last 3 or 4 overs. My Ceefax view assures me that I missed little.

A most enjoyable day at Uxbridge. Highly recommended for those who enjoy a day out at cricket regardless of whether or not the match has profound meaning.

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Lovely Day For A Whipping - SA at Uxbridge Day One

Middlesex till we die (IP Logged)

05/07/2008 07:11

Lovely Day For A Whipping - SA at Uxbridge Day One

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