A nasty lyric, but then Maxwell deserved it. I’m not sure whether or not this one was used. Probably not, or if so only briefly.
It has its moments as a lyric:
MAXWELL’S WIFE
(To the Tune of “Mack the Knife”)
VERSE 1
The old shark had pearly teeth dear,
And he acted rich and flash;
A fat check book had Bob Maxwell,
But that fat Czech had no cash.
VERSE 2
When the old shark took a dive dear,
Filthy lucre rumours spread;
Old age pensions had Bob Maxwell,
And he dumped them in the red.
VERSE 3
Now old Bob’s son name of Kevin,
Tried to save the family;
But the game played wasn’t cricket,
At the Maxwell MCC.
VERSE 4
Down in Chelsea, early morning, (bo, bo, bo)
Press and coppers spring to life;
“Piss off bastards, we’re still sleeping”,
Yes, that sounds like, Maxwell’s wife.
VERSE 5
Maxwell’s rich wife named Pandora,
Raised his bail, proved her rocks;
Kevin Maxwell took the money,
But did not o-pen the box.
VERSE 6
Rupert Murdoch, David Stevens,
Lord Rothermere, Conrad Black;
They’ve all boosted circulation,
Now the Maxwell story’s back.
(OPTIONAL INSTRUMENTAL, WILD DANCING, CORNY BUSINESS AND END)
Here is a vid of Louis Armstrong singing Mack the Knife: