Coal Digger, NewsRevue Lyric, 17 October 1992

This was a very successful number, which ran for many weeks in many runs of NewsRevue, including the Christmas run I’m pretty sure and then the Bowden run in early 1993. 

It’s a belter, with potential for enough business to keep the audience laughing as well as thinking.

♬ COAL DIGGER ♬

(To the Tune of “Goldfinger” with an acapella horn section)

VERSES 1 & 2

Coal diggers,{ba ba ba}

Fear the man,

The man with the miners touch,

A minus touch.

 

Such,

A cold figure,{ba ba ba}

31,

John Major’s no friend of mine,

Nor’s Hestletine.

 

MIDDLE BIT 1

British Coal had a dose of the shits,

So decided to close half the pits,

And the miners all know they’ve been pissed on,

Cos the mining in-dustry’s gone.

 

VERSE 3

Dole figures,{ba ba ba}

Like the men,

Who live in a mining town,

Just won’t go down.

 

MIDDLE BIT 2

All the bosses in power are crass,

Cos they think that they need only gas,

So the miners are once again shafted,

By that coal black hearted bastard.

 

VERSE 4

John Major,{ba ba ba}

Hope he finds,

That trying to shut down coal,

Was an own goal.

 

copyright © Ian Harris 1992

Click here or below for a karaoke version of Goldfinger with the original lyrics on the screen.