An interesting letter to Michael Eriera, with whom I got on well and who liked my material. Useful as proof that some songs, about which I was unsure whether or not they ever featured in the show, were in fact used.
16 April 1993
Dear Michael
Congratulations on a fine opening night. I enjoyed the show and get the feeling that the other writers have been re-inspired. Please pass on my compliments to the team. Now that I have sobered up, I thought that some comments (hopefully they are constructive ones) may be helpful.
SLOWER NUMBERS (NORMAN LAMONT, WILL YOU EMPLOY ME)
I think these work surprisingly well the way you do them (I worry about the slow ones). I was pleased to see the original Norman, rather than the less subtle rewrite that was in the show previously. I decided I didn’t like Employ Me after I wrote it but you’ve made me change my mind.
JOHN MAJOR NUMBERS (DON’T FUCK UP THE ECONOMY, JOLTED JOHN)
I didn’t think there was anything else to say with Don’t Fuck Up, but Keith’s business with the cricket bat and that awful hat have brought it back to life. Jolted John lacked something for me. Perhaps Keith should be prepared to sound a bit less like John Major and more like a nerd in the original tune. Try the spoken bits in between like theatrical asides. That could also make it less static for the first few verses.
BETTER FACE
Needs something else. I love the idea of Sonia doing it but it lacked the laughs. It needs some OTT theatricality to it as it is not really a subtle song (rather, it has one subtle point and smells subtle). I had the dubious privilege of seeing the video for the first time this morning and it gave me a few visual ideas. Consider making one of the chorus a soldier rather than a child – you could spoof the “bass” in the last chorus. Consider candle waving at the end (as long as you don’t burn down the pub). If all else fails then by all means drop it – it’s had a good run before. Please also remember to attribute the money to Save The Children Fund as I assigned the rights to them when I wrote it.
MAASTRICHT
Total success. Proves the point that sailing close to the wind by doing some really difficult songs pays dividends. Well done.
DESIGNER
Needs something. I don’t think people could hear all the words. It is really “a belter” – it cannot be too loud or too melodramatic. I visualise him virtually in tears by the end – he is a ruined man and he’s telling us about it. Consider knicker throwing – the Tom Jones/knickers mind set is so strong. I also thought that it was too soon after the cigarette pun sketch for more puns. If all else fails – try Grunge Clobber Wearer instead which is more topical (and is my pet song of the month).
Hope my comments are helpful. I hope it doesn’t seem too critical as basically I believe that you are on track for a really good run. Well done once again to you all – look forward to seeing you soon.