Another of my personal NewsRevue favourites. Another perennial. It was used a lot in NewsRevue in the mid 1990s.
OLD BOYS
(To the Tune of “Oh Boy”)
VERSE 1
All our class,
All our status,
The proletariat rightly hate us;
Old boys, we’re pals from school,
Old boys, I held your tool,
And now you scratch my back.
VERSE 2
All our lives,
We’ve been a-waiting,
For high class mutual….fund creating;
Old boys, jobs for our people,
Old boys, we don’t want equal,
Opportunities.
MIDDLE EIGHT
DTI say we’ve been a-stealing,
Because we’ve been insider dealing;
We buy shares when they’re low and sell them when they’re high,
With tip offs from chaps in our old school tie.
VERSE 3
All through our,
Fine education,
We learnt the best means of exploitation;
Old boys, we are a team,
Old boys, we take the cream,
And milk the country dry.
Old boys!!
We’ll put to one side the fact that I sort-of went to the “right” sort of school (Alleyn’s) myself. Suffice it to say that I personally neither indulged in the schoolboy behaviours nor the commercial behaviours described in the lyric. Nor am I aware of any such activity among my fellow alumni from Alleyn’s school.
It’s October 2018 as I write and apparently I can’t do English irony…never could it seems…according to the leader of her majesty’s loyal opposition at least.
Of course the term “DTI” in a UK context is outdated at the time of writing but it doesn’t take much wit to replace that term with, for example, “FCA”.
Here is a video of Buddy Holly & The Crickets singing Oh Boy:
…and the following is the record version with lyrics on the screen:
OLD BOYS – EXECUTIVE PAY REMIX
(To the Tune of “Oh Boy”)
VERSE 1
All our class,
All our status,
The proletariat rightly hate us;
Old boys, we’re pals from school,
Old boys, I held your tool,
And now you scratch my back.VERSE 2
All our lives,
We’ve been a-waiting,
For high class mutual….fund creating;
Old boys, jobs for our people,
Old boys, we don’t want equal,
Opportunities.MIDDLE EIGHT
Greenbury say’s we’ve raped the nation,
Because we run huge corporations;
Buy options when they’re low and sell them when they’re high,
But only tax the stuff for the small time guy.VERSE 3
All through our,
Fine education,
We learnt the best means of exploitation;
Old boys, we are a team,
Old boys, we take the cream,
And milk the country dry:
We milk the country dry.Old boys!!