Japan Day Nine: A Kyoto Geisha Tour With Mr Panasonic, 28 October 2018

Having unintentionally done so much touring yesterday, we really did take it easy in the morning. I wanted to do some write ups and organise the ludicrous number of photos we’re generating; both of us wanted to rest/spa a little and be ready in good time for today’s tour and for tomorrow’s off.

So we sat in the main restaurant/grill/bar area for some while after breakfast while I fiddled around, then both returned to the room for some spa and (in my case) more writing up.

How those hours flew by goodness only knows, but we still ended up rushing to be on time for our guide, Eiji Hiraki, who had sent us a reminder note by fax asking us to be punctual.

Eiji turned out to be a quite extraordinary character. He had headed up sales for Panasonic in the Americas for most of his career until, a few years ago, (in my words, not his) retiring and taking up guiding for fun. His other avocations include mountain walking and playing Beatles songs on the guitar.

He is remarkably fit for a seventy-year-old and kept striding ahead of us, while we (surely fit enough) wanted to dwell over some things – but not others. He seemed to think that we would want to spend time and money in gimcrack shops, for example, until we showed no interest in those. But we did want to try black sesame ice cream which slowed him down a little.

Along the way, I learnt that Eiji broke all sales records for Panasonic in the Americas in his time, that Sony was his main competitor and that he spent every night dreaming of how to beat Sony. I concluded that it was far more fun being his client than it would have been to be his employee or, even worse, his competitor.

Eiji seemed a little edgy throughout, in as much as he was insistent that the highlight of our afternoon would be some drinks and snacks in a bar with/on him. Frankly, we were happy to whizz through much of the itinerary, as long as we could see the highlights and linger on the bits that interested us, which we did.

To speed up proceedings, Eiji had produced his own visual aids to explain Kyoto’s history, the way the geisha/maiko system works and so on. Those visual aids really did work, for both of us and especially for Daisy who hates guides who lecture at  length, which Eiji didn’t.

So we saw the Gion district north and south, including Hanami-koji’s tea shops. We wandered around the Yasaka Shrine, we crossed the Tatsumi Bashi Bridge and thus the Shirakawa Canal.

We saw no real geishas or maikos – tourists rarely do, it seems. The streets are thronging with young women who have hired kimonos for the day – mostly Chinese tourists according to Eiji – making the area look very attractive but the geishas are going about their business far more privately.

We have long been fascinated by geishas and how all of that stuff works. When Janie and I first started to go out with each other, my mother seemed to be under the misapprehension that Janie herself was a geisha girl…at least I think that’s what mum said.

Anyway, apparently, these days, the going rate for a well-trained maiko (i.e. a trainee geisha) is about £700 per hour, which is almost enough to make a Big Four Accountancy Partner or Magic Circle Solicitor blush,,,

…I said ALMOST enough.

Once we had ascertained that there were no geishas to be seen, we jumped in a cab downtown to the junction of Shijo Street and Kawaramachi Street, where several big department stores reside and the busiest pedestrian junction in Kyoto. Eiji pointed out a couple of stores, including Takashimaya, where he rated the restaurants, especially the tempura one, if we wanted to eat straight after our drinks and snacks.

Then Eiji took us down a side street to a new bar he was keen to patronise. An extensive drinks menu and snacks list might have been the draw. Plus the spanking newness of the rest rooms etc. perhaps.

So we chatted, drank sake, plum wine and (in Eiji’s case) highballs. We also snacked on edamame beans, salmon sashimi and cucumber with a delicious sweet miso paste – we also at that juncture handed over our respective gifts and sang “All My Loving” a-capella in three part “harmony”.

A very nice, lively fellow drinker took our picture for us and then told us in painfully broken English that his daughter is in London studying fashion while working in a ramen shop and that he hoped to visit London next summer. You have no idea how difficult it was to discern that content, nor how much effort this keen chap was putting in to trying to make us understand his English. It reminded me of a Two Ronnies sketch.

I think we could have carried on drinking with Eiji had we wished, but Janie and I have no real head or stomach for boozing, especially when we have an early start and a long journey the next day. In any case, I had visions of waking up the next morning to discover that I have signed an order for several thousand Panasonic rice cookers and tens of thousands of Panasonic video recorders, so we thought best to thank Eiji and bring an end to proceedings. We headed back to the junction, said goodbye to Eiji and sort-of intended to head back to Gion for the yakitori meal we had half-promised ourselves…

…except we hadn’t tried tempura in the city of tempura and Eiji had said that the yakitori is excellent in Osaka…

…so we relented and did as the master salesman suggested – we ate in the Tsunahachi Tempura restaurant in Takashimaya, which was an excellent meal and great fun.

I managed to blob a piece of tempura squid onto my shirt early in the meal, much to the hilarity of a lady diner at the counter, who was trying to be a polite lady by missing my gaze, but clearly couldn’t stop watching us and finding us a mixture of fascinating and hilarious. The restaurant should have paid us a fee for entertaining the customers. £700 per hour would secure our services as entertainers, eh, Daisy?

We retired to the hotel by cab, tired but exhilarated by another truly fun day.

All the pictures from Day Nine can be seen by clicking the Flickr link here or below:

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