A Long Weekend In Sussex, Using A Petworth v Dedanists Tennis Match As The Excuse, 25 to 28 March 2023

In the heat of battle at Petworth

Robert Muir tapped me up for this late March Sunday tennis match at Petworth. I realised that it would make an excellent “excuse” for us (me and Janie) to enjoy a short break in Sussex, having done nothing of that kind for so many months.

I hired, through Air B’n’B, what looked like and turned out to be a charming old cottage in Fittleworth for a few days.

The following piece has about 40 of the photos we took scattered in it. If you prefer pictures to words, here is a Flickr link to all 126 pictures we have stored:

Good shot, sir.

Saturday 25 March – Limping From London To Fittleworth, Then Dining In Petworth

Janie and I played our regular game of (modern) tennis on the Saturday morning and set off after a light lunch.

The adventure did not start well.

Dumbo, The Suzuki Jimny, who had recently had a flat tyre & wheel change, let us know as soon as he went over 40 mph that he was not going to be happy at speed, juddering like crazy. Dumbo is well known around London as a pandemic hero…

…but his popularity on and beyond the M25, juddering along at 35-40 mph. was not evident. People were hooting and gesticulating at us.

Daisy got on the mobile phone, trying to locate garages or “tyre services” near to our location on the M25/M3, with limited success, until someone in goodness knows where recommended someone in Guildford, who suggested that we were nearer to Aldershot…

…two keen lads at Aldershot Kwikfit identified that the problem was tyre-balancing and thought that their machine was not working properly because the imbalance appeared “off the scale”. I guessed that the tyre dude in Acton had sold us a dud, so we decided to limp on to Fittleworth and take stock on Monday.

A sliver of Peshwari Nan, me dear?

We commissioned Sue’s cabs (a two-car, husband & wife combination, in which the wife seems very much in charge…we were allocated husband Charles) to take us to and from our Fittleworth cottage to Basmati in the Petworth Market Square – suitably located next door to the Co-op where we could get some basic supplies for our few days.

We had an excellent meal, comprising Peshwari nan & papadoms to start, followed by chicken tikka shobuz (Daisy’s choice), jatt lamb (my choice) tarkha dhaal and lemon rice. A very juicy Malbec helped to wash all of that down and some very friendly and helpful staff served it all.

Just the ticket.

Sunday 26 March – The Big Match At Petworth

This was not to be my first experience of playing at Petworth – that pleasure was about five years ago, soon after the major refurbishment there had been completed:

Anyway, Robert had kindly arranged for me (and a couple of other Dedanists who had ventured far for this fixture) to play two short rubbers rather than one, which added to the fun.

Kim Walker and Me for the Dedanists

A sweet win, coming from behind

Between my two short rubbers, a fine lunch of pies and veg, produced in ample quantities by Robert and Carole.

I partnered Chris Marguerie in the second of my rubbers, which was closer than the first but, much like that first rubber, a victory despite being behind for most of the rubber.

Janie was absolutely rapt with attention during that second rubber of mine. Unfortunately, she was paying attention to Nigel Pendrigh and discussing all manner of paramedical matters rather than hanging on my every shot. What a strange way to spend your time at a real tennis match.

Joking apart, the whole event was wonderfully convivial time with old friends and new, as well as good fun tennis, which is just as such friendly matches should be.

We snacked light that evening back at our little cottage, enjoying the peace and privacy and the rather fruity bottle of white depicted above, courtesy of our host.

Monday 27 March – A Day In Petworth

At the tennis match, we discussed Dumbo’s little problem with several of the locals. Robert and most of the others were emphatic..

speak with Alan at Market Square Garage in Petworth tomorrow.

…so we did; first thing. Alan said he’d give it a try.

While awaiting Dumbo’s diagnosis, we visited Janie’s favourite shop in Petworth, Tallulah Fox, where we again bought some Italian coloured glasses from Sarah, just as we had on our previous visit to Petworth.

Alan’s Dumbo diagnosis was that the dud tyre was “off the scale unbalanced” and needed replacing. He also pointed out that the spare, upon which I had been unconsciously pinning my hopes for several years, was also a dud and would not be a safe replacement. I asked him to order and replace two, such that I’d have a matching pair at the front and the older front tyre that was not a dud could become a useable spare.

Alan told us that the tyres would definitely arrive at some point that afternoon, enabling him to complete the job, but it could be any time in the afternoon.

Thus our plans were laid. We would do our day of walking around Petworth House, Gardens and Deer Park. Worse things could happen to us on a beautiful sunny spring day, two minutes walk from the entrance to Petworth House & Park.

Two minutes later…the park entrance

At the park entrance, we happened upon Martin, who is the head gardener for the grounds. He and Janie had quite a long conversation about plants, shrubs and trees, quite a bit of which was in Latin. I understood “daffodils”, “ponds”, “deer”, “landscape”, “Capability Brown” and a few other words.

Probably best I tell the next part of the story in pictures more than words.

Mostly my pictures around the deer park – one or two are Janie’s. It is a shame my tennis shots are not as consistent as my photo shots.

After that long walk around the deer park we were ready for an early lunch, so we parted company with the entrance fees and entered the house and gardens.

We were persuaded to join a short talk about J.M.W. Turner in the card room first.

Janie savoured this unlikely scene of cricketers and fallow deer in front of the pond

Then we took an early lunch. Just as well we went early – we managed to get a table and our choice of grub: tuna jacket-tater for Daisy, za’atar chicken bap for me. But before we had finished our grub, another couple asked to share our table and they discovered that almost all of the food was sold out…at around 12:50. (Blame Brexit/Covid/Putin/rail strikes).

Then we had a look around the servants’ quarters, not least the old kitchens, which were fascinating and rather stunning in their own way. Janie coveted some of the larger pieces of equipment which were almost as big as our entire kitchen.

More copper than the Met Police

“Looks real. Are you SURE we can’t eat it?”

The Scullery

Still Room

Janie showed our age by confessing that she did a holiday job as a kid for a wealthy, elderly couple who had a communications system that looked just like this

Then we looked at a small modern art exhibition.

Janie’s gloves were well colour-co-ordinated with several of the pictures

Refreshed and mentally stimulated, we set off for a second walk – this time around the pleasure gardens part. A slightly shorter, similar loop to our morning walk, but very different look in the pleasure garden.

Daffodils – see, I did understand what they had been talking about

Is that the village idiot or did Daisy just twig the folly of the Doric Temple?

Is that the Petworth rough sleeper or were the exertions now catching up with Ged?

Approaching the Rotunda

A thrush at surprisingly close quarters

Along the way, we encountered the gardeners again. Janie asked one of them about a particular shrub, to which he said…

…oh yes, you’re the couple that was talking to Martin earlier. I’m not entirely sure, but Martin will know…

MARTIN (from behind a larger bush): Enkanthus perulaus…

…so now we all know. Was Martin following us around?

Not sure, but when I stopped to take the following picture…

…I heard the gardeners’ buggy coming, stopped, stood to attention, saluted and got well splashed by the puddle they went through. Janie, from a safe distance, saw the whole episode unfolding and could not stop laughing for a while. Nor could I. They must have thought that I was a right twit of a city boy!

Once Janie stopped laughing, I took her photo with that magnolia:

Soon we were back at the house and in need of a little more refreshment – i.e. a cup of coffee to perk ourselves up – before looking at the bits of the main house we hadn’t seen before lunch:

Chapel

The Leconfield Chaucer

Ming, Italianate and Japanese things

Exceptional murals on the grand staircase

St.Mary’s Petworth, as seen from that staircase

We then left Petworth House, wondering where we might go to while away the time until Alan had prepared Dumbo. Just as we were walking through the exit door into the town, my phone went. Dumbo was ready for us.

Dumbo’s new found friends at Alan’s place

Dumbo seemed a little reluctant to leave his new found friends. To be honest, he’s been getting ideas above his service station ever since he encountered the following mob in a car park a couple of week’s ago:

Two Lamborghinis, Dumbo and a red Ferrari. That’s Waitrose Bayswater for you

But I digress. We’d had a super day.

Tuesday 28 March – Brighton, Hove & Home

The weather turned yukky again on the Tuesday, but that didn’t really effect us. We rose quite early, checked out of our sweet little cottage in Fittleworth and went to see Sidney & Joan in Hove, via a short stop at Pendulum in Brighton, where Janie likes to treat me to some louder, fancier clothing than I would ever treat myself. This was a successful visit – three shirts, three pairs of troos and a pair of boat shoes.

Trigger warning: you might need sunglasses for my shirts if you run across me this summer.

Nothing looks colourful on a gloomy day, but Daisy thought the car in front of us was well colour-co-ordinated with the Brighton lamp posts

Then lunch with Sidney and Joan, for the first time since before the pandemic, which is too long of course. It was lovely to see them again and we chatted about many things, not least family stories from way back when. Word had reached Sidney about his Uncle Sid’s revived fame as a saw player, explain and linked within the following:

Lunch and the afternoon flew by, which left only the journey home and an early night, as Janie and I were both tired but very satisfied at the end of our short break.

If you want to see all 126 pictures, here again is the Flickr link:

126 shots on target, which certainly cannot be said for my tennis

Skills Night At Lord’s, 1 March 2023

The curry had to wait while I doled out a vast number of “valuable” prizes – with thanks to Tony Friend and Chris Bray for the pictures.

Putting me in charge of the real tennis skills night is a bit like putting Boris Johnson in charge of an honesty bar, or Suella Braverman in charge of a kindness campaign.

Anyway, the powers that be have deemed me suited to the task, perhaps in a bid to keep me and my tenuous relationship with tennis skills away from attempting the actual skill trials themselves. In truth I very much enjoy hosting the event.

It has become a twice-yearly thing now – once in the spring and once in the autumn, which makes sense.

While this team of three deploys its skills, you might just make me out, in the distance, badgering the next team to ready themselves

I see no point in repeating my write up for the MCC Newsletter here – you can read it through this link if you are eligible. In the unlikely event that the link doesn’t work for you but you still want to read the report, I have scraped it to here.

I did not go into detail in that match report about the vast number of valuable prizes on offer, but the following pictures might provide some clues.

Brandon appreciates winning the “close but no cigar” award

Fergus scores a cool half-million bucks as the most valuable player

Andrew Hinds presents the coveted Hinds trophy to the lowest-scoring team

The victorious trio celebrate their win

As it happens, Tony Friend’s team was victorious again this time, reprising his famous success in 2016 along with yours truly on that occasion – my first skills night and sole success as a player in the skills tournament.