Category: Tennis (real and modern)

The MCC Tennis Weekend 2024: The Secret Diary Of Ian Harris Aged 61 and 5/12ths, 26 to 28 January 2024

Me looking to hit a rare winner

I wrote up my experience of the MCC Tennis Weekend as a “Secret Diary” piece which found its way onto the MCC website as the authoritative report on the event.

As everything I wanted to say about that most enjoyable weekend is contained in that report, I replicate it here, with the links to other resources for anyone who might be interested.

The Secret 2024 MCC Tennis Club Weekend Diary Of Ian Harris, Aged Sixty-One And Five Twelfths

I felt excited and fearful in equal measure when I learned that I had been promoted to Group B of the MCC Club Weekend this year. Surely Group C is where I belong.  The pros told me that Group B, this year, would be for 50-60 handicappers, like me.

I was to partner the actor Ian Falconer, with whom I had played a fair bit before. He can exert a calming and experienced influence over me. Anyway, there was no time to fret on Friday morning, as we played two tough matches, both of which we won; the second by quite some margin. My sense of imposter syndrome begone.

Ian Falconer said that I left the ball well in that second match. That reminded me of comments I have oft received about my cricket batting; that my best shot is the leave. Less kindly folk tell me that, apart from the block, the leave is my only cricket shot.

Tennis leaves don’t look very pretty on camera. Here is a link to a “lowlights” video package of our successful leaves in that Friday morning bout, with “musical” accompaniment. To be fair on our opponents, they hit some actual winners – e.g. these two top notch shots.

Our group then had a 24-hour break from the tennis, until Saturday afternoon. I enjoyed the convivial Friday evening dinner, with great company, great grub and surprisingly interesting speeches, not least from the Chairman, Bruce Carnegie-Brown, who broke the good news to us that real tennis play during test matches should be restored henceforward, with just a small risk of occasional interruption for media purposes.

Ian Falconer was unable to attend the dinner, as he is deep into rehearsal for a play in which he plays a domineering father. He was also to attend an audition the next morning, for a film role as Hitler.

Less aware of my partner’s acting techniques than his tennis techniques, I worried overnight that Ian might be a practitioner of The Method. If so, that calm, gentle, encouraging persona I had previously experienced, might be replaced with something…less comforting and more shouty. I decided that we should agree a safety phrase, “who do you think you are kidding, Mr Falconer?”, just in case matters got out of hand for the rest of the weekend. I am pleased to report that neither of us needed to resort to the safety phrase.

Saturday’s battles in our group were really close. We managed one (narrow) win and a draw, leaving us top of the table and qualified for a semi-final before the final day. All groups (including ours) had at least one, if not both, semi-final places up for grabs still on the Sunday.

There were many distractions for tennis-loving MCC folk early that Sunday morning. First thing, at home, I followed the India v England test match, the Australia v West Indies test, the Australian Open (lawn tennis) Men’s final and the live stream from Lord’s of our tournament. “Isn’t this a bit too much stimulation before you play?”, asked my wife, Janie. “Probably”, said I. By the time I set off for Lord’s, I knew that our pair had won Group B whatever happened in our last group match.

I got to Lord’s in time to see the final wicket fall in the India v England test along with my tennis friends in the dedans gallery, which was a wonderful watching moment ahead of playing our final group match.  We lost that match narrowly, despite having been ahead. “Foreshadowing”, as my dramaturge/actor tennis partner might well say.

We enjoyed lunch in the Long Room Bar between our last group match and the semi-final. All three days, in fact, lunch is an informal pleasure as part of this tournament. An opportunity to chat with friends, old and new, in convivial surroundings. The glorious sunshine all three afternoons added to that pleasure.

The tale of the Groups C/D category was one of mostly close-fought matches during the group stages. That characteristic persisted into the finals stages, with, in particular, a nail-biting semi-final Brunner & Vacher v Nelson & Stain. The Group C/D final, Brunner & Vacher v Lark & McDermott was similarly close and exciting to watch. Congratulations to the winners: Peter Brunner & Piers Vacher.

In the Groups A/B category, the main story was the dominance of the Cattermull & Parkes pairing. My own semi-final, Falconer & Harris v Bishop & Whiting, was one of the most exciting matches I have ever played. We had our chances…we came close. The final, Bishop & Whiting v Cattermull & Parkes, was one-sided in the final score, but was an excellent display of good tennis by all four players. It was just the relentless consistency of Paul Cattermull & Rufus Parkes, despite giving up significant handicaps, that saw them dominate their matches and storm home with the trophy.

It was a superb weekend which should live long in the memory. The organisers – Hannah and Dinesh, the professionals – Chris, Chris and Alex, and the tennis committee – especially Giles and Graeme, all deserve our thanks and praise.

If you only watch one of the video clips, I’d recommend this one: six “highlights” that couldn’t possibly be described adequately in words. [alternatively click the YouTube below]

Real Tennis Skills Night & Club Nights At Lord’s, Some Really Real Tennis At Queen’s, Dedanist’s Lunch At Lemonia & Ivan Shakespeare Memorial Dinner In Holborn, November & December 2023

This photo and others from Skills Night by Conor Coley, with thanks

Skills Night At Lord’s 1 November 2023

Lord’s Skills Nights, now held twice-yearly, have become “my thing”, by dint of me, foolishly, offering to help back in 2019. Foolishly, because I thought “help” might mean adding a bit of extra resource to a well-managed thing, rather than, as it turned out, replacing the manager who used to manage the well-managed thing. Thank you, Johnny Whiting.

Still, in truth I enjoy managing it as much of not more than I enjoyed playing it. The curry and wine afterwards always was the highlight and I can certainly still participate in that aspect.

At least i get to curate the prize-giving, providing room for all manner of subsidiary prizes and opportunities to give away gimcrack.

Most Valuable Player Award – a millionaire every time

The Close But No Cigar Award

If you have an MCC login – everything you ever wanted to know about his event but were afraid to ask can be found here. In the unlikely event that someone else wants to read my match report in excruciating detail, click here.

Lord’s Club Nights, 16 November and 13 December 2023

By similar method, although slightly less formal, Steven Bishop managed to finesse a seemingly one-off request to “look after Club Night” for him on one occasion just before the pandemic, into “I’m basically not really in London midweek any more…” me looking after Club Night most months.

This informal evening can be curated while playing, which I very much enjoy doing on these occasions. We get a mixture of regulars and newbies. It is always possible to mix and match, to make the evening fun and good practice for most if not all who attend.

An Afternoon Watching Really Real Doubles At Queen’s, 17 November 2023

The only slot of the British Open that worked for me this year – I very much enjoyed a few hours at Queen’s watching proper real tennis doubles on Quarter-Finals afternoon. I saw Rob Fahey and Nicky Howell overcome Levi Gale & Lewis Williams, then John Lumley & Steve Virgona defeat Claire Fahey and Louis Gordon. A pleasant afternoon, during which time I ran into several people I know, which is more or less guaranteed if you go to see real tennis.

Dedanist’s Lunch At Lemonia Followed By Ivan Shakespeare Memorial Dinner At Spaghetti House Holborn, 14 December 2023

A Highlight of the real tennis year is the Dedanist’s seasonal lunch, at Lemonia. On this occasion I needed to be reasonably abstemious because OI was going on that evening to the annual Ivan Shakespeare Memorial Dinner afterwards.

But reasonably abstemious still allowed for a glass-and-a-half of wine, some tasty grub and excellent company.

The photo below from the Ivan Shakespeare, not The Dedanist’s.

Gresham Society Visit To The Royal Tennis Court, Hampton Court, 14 September 2023

The building “set back” with a turret in the above picture is the original Tudor-period covered tennis court at Hampton Court Palace, with several walls remaining, one of which is part of the current, Stuart-period covered court, which is on the site of the original uncovered court.

Thanks to Janie for most of the pictures and all the videos (apart from the professional highlights vid).

Whose idea was it to have a real tennis-themed event at Hampton Court? As the event proved to be a great success, Tim Connell is claiming full responsibility for the idea. Meanwhile, I am claiming at least to have inspired the idea with my lockdown webinar, Tennis Around The Time Of Thomas Gresham, in 2020.

Tennis Around The Time Of Thomas Gresham, Gresham Society Webinar Presentation, 7 October 2020

Full credit to Tim for the timing of the event – he insisted that we try to find a sweet spot between the summer holidays and the weather turning autumnal. A hostage to fortune, perhaps, but the timing worked brilliantly, as we were blessed with a sunny but not too hot afternoon for the event.

The good people at the Royal Tennis Court, Hampton Court (RTCHC) were incredibly helpful in allowing us to hold the event and facilitating same, from the initial conversation I had about it with Lesley Ronaldson the previous autumn right through to the day itself. Thanks to all named below plus Nick Wood, the RTCHC Head Professional, without whose blessing none of this would have been possible.

The History Of The Court & Explaining The Game, David Best, Lesley Ronaldson & Jack Josephs

Yours truly introducing David Best

Lesley very kindly suggested that David Best, who wrote THE book on the history of the Royal Tennis Court, speak to our group on that topic. David even more kindly agreed to speak and also to join in our brief “exhibition” to demonstrate the game.

Lesley Ronaldson, a Real Tennis Hall of Famer in her own right, assisted David’s history talk…

…while Lesley also assisted Jack Joseph’s explanation of the game in all its facets

RTCHC’s junior professional, Jack Josephs, did most of the game explaining. Two years ago, when I first met Jack at Middlesex University’s court, he was a complete newbie!

Both Lesley and Jack talked a lot of balls…I mean, talked a lot ABOUT balls

After hearing about it, Gresham Society members and guests were invited to have a go. Surprisingly, many tried…

Unsurprisingly, few succeeded. It is a fiendishly difficult game, even for moderately talented regular enthusiasts. For neophytes it is even harder than that.

Basil’s first ever hit of a Real Tennis ball skimmed beautifully over the net. The second did not – Basil claims that it was poorly delivered.

Tim & Bobbie; “close but no cigar” in the matter of hitting the ball over the net

Janie’s technique looks wanting, but she landed chases with each of her goes

Then a short exhibition, during which David Best and I, ably assisted by a professional on each side – thank you Jack & thank you Scott Blaber – demonstrated through a short match how it should and shouldn’t be done. Lesley supplied the commentary, as did the players when at the service end.

Janie shot very little video of the exhibition match…”thank goodness” I hear many readers cry…but here is a short snippet to give you an idea:

If you want to see what the game looks like at the highest level, the following six minute reel of highlights shows the very top professionals at play:

Tea & Cake

Then, for the Gresham Society visitors and their guests it was time for tea and cake. In truth I hadn’t realised, when the RTCHC people said that they would lay on tea and cake, that “Lesley Ronaldson’s home made cake” is what they meant.

Had I known that, I wouldn’t have teased Lesley by e-mail a couple of days before with the words:

No pressure, but my wife, Janie, will be judging the whole event on her piece of cake. 

Former US Open Champions / World Championship Finalists are not deterred such entreaties. As we know, champions adjust and pressure is a privilege.

Lesley “pulled off a blinder” in the matter of the home made cakes, to such an extent that Janie was too busy enjoying the tea break to photograph same until most of the sweet delicacies had been well and truly devoured.

The weather was simply glorious at that stage of the afternoon, allowing the visitors to enjoy the wonderful tea and cakes in the garden – hence the barren look of the dining room in the above photo.

The visitors took some marshalling back into the dedans gallery for the final part of the visit, a performance symposium, led by yours truly, on the topic of “Hampton Court, Tennis, Gresham, Music & Drama”.

Click here or below for a link to the full transcript, which actually extends to something like 90-100 minutes if it was all used at the same event – we used about 60 minutes of the material.

Hampton Court, Tennis, Gresham, Music & Drama

The performance was ably supported by Jack Carter and Reuben Ard, tennis-playing music graduate / research students from Middlesex University Real Tennis Club and a couple of guest appearances from Tim and Pilar Connell. Also providing praiseworthy support were the visitors, most of whom sang along with the help of their scripts/song sheets. Click here for a pdf of those extracts.

I was particularly impressed that people sang along so well to “In Darkness Let Me Paint It Black” – see final embed below.

Janie got busy with the video app on her phone during the performances, so several highlights and lowlights were recorded. Below only the highlights as YouTube embeds.

I would recommend, if you were to choose only one highlight, Reuben Ard’s performance of William Byrd’s Earl of Salisbury Pavan, which was really quite magical performed in that wonderful setting on “electric virginals”:

Word is, most if not all of the visitors thoroughly enjoyed their afternoon at Royal Tennis Court, Hampton Court. Thanks again to our hosts, who made us feel so welcome and steered the event to sweet success.

A Day At Wimbledon, Quarter Final Tuesday, Mostly On Court One, 11 July 2023

To the umpire’s left hand – Marketa Vondrousova, to his right hand – Jessica Pegula

We’ve had several lucky years of late in the Wimbledon ballot, not least last year when we scored really good centre court tickets:

And Finally…We Visit Wimbledon Centre Court On A Finals Day, 7 July 2022

This year – nada. Oh well…

…but wait! An opportunity to snap up a pair of returns…Good ones?…Quarter-finals Tuesday on Court One? Yes please!

So there we were again.

Forgive us if we look a tiny bit smug

The weather forecast was less than special but if you are on Court One you are guaranteed your main action of course.

As it turned out, it looked as thought the weather would hold through the morning, so we did our usual thing of setting off reasonably early to catch a bit of smaller court action before our main event.

First up, we fancied seeing some juniors tennis and chose Viktor Frydrych (of Great Britain) v Darwin Blanch (USA) on Court 12.

17-year-old Frydrych top, 15-year-old Blanch below

We saw Frydrych win the first set but I thought Blanch the more promising player given the age difference, plus the power and accuracy Blanch demonstrated at such a young age.

We moved on to Court 3 to catch the first set of a doubles match: Wesley Koolhof and Neal Skupski v Max Purcell and Jordan Thompson:

Umpire Fergus Murphy explains the rules to all four of them

Skupski top, Thompson below

Koolhof serves as Skupski waits to pounce

Koolhof and Skupski started slowly and looked a little out of sorts for the first 10 minutes or so, then quickly seemed to find their footing on a blowy day. Never let it be said that I don’t spot winners when I choose our morning of outer court viewing.

Still looking a bit smug

Then we needed to hot-foot it to Court One to be sure to catch the start of the quarter final action. Jessica Pegula v Marketa Vondrousova.

Do we look a little out of breath? We were there in time, just about. The nice lady with the pink cardigan behind us turned out to be even more of a tennis badger than us – she’s a self-confessed addict.

In truth, I wasn’t expecting this to be a great match because I thought that Vondrousova’s lack of form/experience on grass would be exploited by Pegula. What do I know?

In the end, it was actually a great match, with twists and turns and passages of great tennis.

Pegula top, Vondrousova below

After the rain/roof delay, Vondrousova took control and turned the match around. We were very impressed with her but still, frankly, did not expect her to win the tournament – I don’t suppose many people did. Still, well done her.

Rishi Persad asked Marketa Vondrousova penetrating questions of the “how does it feel to reach the semi-finals at Wimbledon?” variety. “Crazy” was Marketa’s pleonastic response word.

Next up, Jannik Sinner v Roman Safiullin. We were very excited to get a look at Sinner live, as we think he is a player with great potential. Again, I thought this match might be a one-sided affair as Safiullin has neither a track record on grass, nor going deep in slams. Again, this turned out to be a better match than we expected, with Sinner winning in four sets.

Safiullin serving, Sinner receiving

Apparently Sinner’s Gucci bag caused a fashionista stir

After that, rather than stick around for Invitation Doubles (or “Old Git Doubles” as I rather impolitely tend to call it), we took advantage of the improved weather and headed back to Court 3 where Jessica Pegula and Coco Gauff were taking on Laura Siegemund and Vera Zvonareva in third round doubles action.

Lovely views across Wimbledon from our seats there

Richard Haigh officiating

Laura Siegemund top, Vera Zvonareva below

Jessica top, Coco below

This was also the perfect opportunity to finish our picnic before going home. We had enjoyed our prawn and mayonnaise sandwiches during the Ladies Quarter-Final, but hadn’t felt hungry for our pork and apple sauce ones until after the Men’s Quarter-Final.

Sandwiches duly finished and Court One crowd mostly dispersed, we took our leave of Wimbledon towards the end of that Ladies Doubles match and wended our way home, “super tired but super happy”, as the young folk say.

All the photos (there are 80+ in all) can be seen on Flickr by clicking here or below.

A Short Break In Eastbourne, Mostly For The International Tennis Tournament, 25 to 28 June 2023

Camilla Giorgi practicing with Daddy

Having thoroughly enjoyed the relaxed, fun and friendly atmosphere at the Edgbaston Priory tennis tournament last year…

So-Called “Proper Tennis” At Edgbaston Priory, 17 June But Not 18 June 2022

…we decided to give Eastbourne International a try this year. That idea proved to be a resounding success. We loved the place and the tennis and everything about our short break.

We took an insane number of pictures for a three-night, two-day break. Here (and/or the picture link below) is the whole lot of them – just shy of 200:

If you prefer some words and a small sample of the pictures, don’t click, just read/skim on.

Sunday 25 June 2023 – Travel, Taking Root and Thai Grub

We booked an Airbnb house at the Sovereign Harbour end of town – beyond walking distance to the tennis but easy parking when at the house. The cricket & croquet club in Eastbourne runs an event parking arrangement for the tennis tournament that made a great deal of sense for us.

The house is lovely and that area quiet and well provisioned. We stocked up on picnic food at the main Waitrose in Eastbourne as we drove into town, thus we were set for our visits to the ground.

There is a selection of restaurants in the harbour. We chose the Thai one, which was a nice place with “Chinese-oriented Thai food” – i.e. mostly not too spicy and a lot of Chinese-influenced dishes mixed in with the traditional Thai curries.

In culinary terms, it reminded me a bit of Haozhan in Gerard Street and the late lamented Bangkok in Bute Street.

It was a very enjoyable way to start our break.

Monday 26 June 2023 – Eastbourne International Tennis Day One

I was on picnic duties and rose early to make a tempting spread. Hot smoked salmon bagels and chicken sandwiches were the centrepieces that day, if I remember correctly.

We had front row seats on Centre Court that day. We saw:

  • Tomas Martin Etcheverry v Jeffrey John Wolf;
  • Shuai Zhang v Harriet Dart,
  • Daria Kasatkina v Anhelina Kalinina,
  • Ryan Peniston v Marc-Andrea Huesler.
We cheered for JJ Wolf, who played very well

Etcheverry seemed uncomfortable on grass

We took a stroll after the first set and snapped Maria Camilla Osorio Serrano playing Shelby Rogers on an outer court. It is that sort of place.

Shuai Zhang v Harriet Dart (see above pictures) was probably the match of the day.

After that match, we took another stroll. Janie got a bit groupie-like when she spotted Taylor Fritz just strolling around Devonshire Park.

At least Janie didn’t ask him for a selfie – plenty of people did!

Daria Kasatkina bested Anhelina Kalinina on the day. Try saying that after a few drinks – just as well we weren’t drinking

Ryan Peniston came off second best against Marc Huegler.

We took a late afternoon stroll, where we saw Jelena Ostopenko playing doubles on an outer court.

It started to get a bit chilly, so we didn’t stay for the “bonus doubles match” on Centre Court. We’d had a great day of tennis.

We even got to see some cricket as we walked around the cricket ground to get our car.

Janie loved the sun terrace at the back of our little house. It was just a bit too chilly to mull our day over a glass of wine out there, so we mulled indoors instead.

Tuesday 27 June 2023 – Eastbourne International Tennis Day Two

A similar picnic for Day Two; I was still on picnic duty. I say “I”, but actually we have a prima-donna of a picnic chef named Igor who comes to make our picnics when it is my turn. He insists on absolute silence and no-one else coming near the kitchen while he is creating his masterpieces.

The central pieces for this one were smoked trout bagels plus ham and cheese sandwiches.

Janie snapped the Eastbourne front on the way to the ground

We were five rows back on Day Two – arguably a better vantage point unless you are especially keen to be on camera! The selfie on the Flickr link near the top of this piece is from those seats.

We saw:

  • Liam Broady v Jan Choinski;
  • Petra Martic v Katie Boulter;
  • Bernarda Pera v Coco Gauff;
  • Zhizhen Zhang v Lorenzo Sonego.

We had an early stroll around this day, where we saw, amongst other things, Camilla and her dad training (see headline picture).

Liam and Jan doing battle

Were Petra Martic and Katie Boulter going to play dressed like that?

…NO!…

Certainly not with Alex de Minaur and family looking on!

I sneaked a look at Mikael Ymer playing well on Court One

While Janie spotted Heather Watson on an outer court

Then back to Centre Court for some Coco (and Bernarda)

The pick of the day’s matches was actually the one from which I expected the least. Zhizhen Zhang is a very promising player but had not really played before on grass, whereas Lorenzo Sonego has shown decent form on the surface.

Sonego looked the part…

…but Zhang performed brilliantly

That match proved to be a suitable finale to our trip.

We certainly aim to return to Eastbourne again. The people were friendly and the atmosphere at the tournament lacks the corporate glitz and heave-ho of the bigger, more prestigious tournaments. Our style, we felt.

Wednesday 28 June 2023 – Driving Home While Listening To The Lord’s Test

A testing drive, this was, listening to England bowl in cloudy conditions but without the necessary luck/penetration in the second Ashes test match. The next few days were to be Lord’s days for me, but this day was the one day this week where the only live sport was dodging the traffic and the bizarre manoeuvres of other motorists.

Dumbo – tennis and cricket superstar – getting us there and back

A Day At The Queen’s Club Watching Young Guns Play Lawners, 21 June 2023

My visits to The Queen’s Club aren’t all about playing real tennis and winning tournaments/trophies myself.

Finally…Unprecedented Success At Tennis, The Queen’s Club, 11 May & 27 May 2022

Gosh no.

Janie and I decided to spend a day watching the grass court tournament at Queen’s this year, as well as several days at other less high-falutin’ tournaments such as Eastbourne and Wimbledon (see subsequent Ogblogs for those).

Being Wednesday, we got to see four of the Round Of 16 matches. We saw:

  • Lorenzo Musetti beat Ben Shelton;
  • Cameron Norrie beat Jordan Thompson;
  • Holger Rune beat Ryan Peniston;
  • Sebastian Korda beat Frances Tiafoe.

Lots of players we like and/or wanted to see on that list, so we were very pleased with our schedule for the day.

We also strolled the campus a fair bit, although the place was very crowded compared with our previous visit to see lawners during the socially-distanced summer of 2021:

A Day Watching Lawn Tennis At The Queen’s Club, 15 June 2021

Returning to 2023, we took loads of photographs, more of players we weren’t going to see practicing on practice courts than pictures of our own matches.

Here’s a sample of them, ahead of a link which will allow you to skim the whole lot:

Tim Henman, Annabel Croft & Catherine Whitaker

The view from our pews – not bad – Ben Shelton getting ready to serve

Lorenzo Musetti in full flow

Diego Schwartzman practicing

Lloyd Glasspool practicing

Daisy & Ged model a fridge for reasons known only to the Haider marketing team

Daisy gets busy with the selfies

Cam Norrie heads our way

Adrian Mannarino at practice

Ryan Peniston takes the ball

Holger Rune serves

Commentators on a balcony behind us. At one point Annabel came and sat right behind us

Frances Tiafoe

Sebastian Korda

We had a very enjoyable day, although I must say that the Queen’s tournament feels a bit more corporate, less fun & friendly, each time we go there now.

Here and below a link to all of our photos from that day.

A Clubby Week, Mostly At Lord’s For The Ireland Test, Late May To Early June 2023

Jack Leach warming up on Day Three

Tuesday 30 May – A Streatham BBYO Youth Club Reunion At Cafe Pacifico

Waiting for Andrea? Actually this picture from our 2019 gathering at Bill’s

In a minor break with tradition, we gathered at that Mexican institution, Cafe Pacifico, in Covent Garden this year, at Andrea’s excellent suggestion.

In compliance with the strict traditions of our group, Andrea was late. In the modern era, Andrea is able to pre-announce her tardiness by sending a message to everyone explaining why, on this one occasion, she has been delayed. It always feels in keeping with our long-established social mores. If Andrea is ever to be on time I think she should message us to warn us of that – the shock of her timely arrival might be too great for some of our ageing tickers.

Andrea back then

Anyway, it is always worth the wait to see Andrea, just as it is always worth the wait to see everyone from the youth club gang again. We used to gather almost every week, of course – youth clubs tend to be a bit like that.

Time rolls on, but when we gather it feels as though the decades have changed this gang remarkably little. Coincidentally, Cafe Pacifico similarly felt much like the place I remember trying many decades ago; probably because it is little changed.

As always, we had a very enjoyable evening.

Wednesday 31 May – A Redoubtable Bout Of Doubles Tennis At Lord’s

Me & Mr Thirlwell after a previous battle at Lord’s (early 2020)

Our real tennis court at Lord’s has been sequestered by the cricket authorities “for media purposes” during the major matches this year (don’t get me started) so it made obvious sense to have a game the evening before the temporary closure.

Indeed, even without the closure, I realised that it was a personal tradition for me to play the day before an Ireland test at Lord’s – I have now done so every time such a test has ever been held throughout history (both times):

The Week That Ireland Came To Lord’s, 23 to 26 July 2019

This time it was a ninety minute doubles helping to warm up my friends Andrew Hinds and John Thirlwell who are partnering each other in the in-house tournament. We had a three-set epic, which my partner, Bill, and I managed to take at the very last gasp in a decider, having been one-set-all, five-games-all.

Great fun and a good battle.

Thursday 1 June – England v Ireland Day One At Lord’s

Pavilion View

I went to the gym to get a bit of exercise ahead of the excesses of a few days at Lord’s. I togged up for the pavilion and enjoyed 30-40 minutes of cricket from there before lunch, chatting with Nick Brown from Dulwich College, exchanging interesting thoughts and word on our respective initiatives on community participation cricket.

After lunch, it seemed if anything to get colder in the pavilion. Then the sun came out and I realised that the pavilion would warm up slowly, whereas I might warm up more quickly in one of my favoured sunny spots in the Tavern Stand – if I could get there before the stampede from the chilly Pavilion and Warner.

Made it. No sweat. It was still quite cold, even in the sun, so no sweat.

I watched and read a bit, interrupted only by the arrival of Sidney Yankson & his entourage – I was inadvertently sitting behind their chosen patch. Sidney is one of my real tennis pals, whom I first met when he organised a match between the MCC and Honourable Artillery Company five years ago.

Big Match Weekend At Lord’s Part One: MCC v HAC Real Tennis Match, 21 July 2017

Mid afternoon I received a message from Jonny “Twophones” Hurst to say that he had a spare seat in the Compton Lower and was wondering whether I would care to join him and his mate, Huge Morg. Who could say no to such an invitation.

Jonny Twophones & Huge Morg

We spent the rest of the afternoon watching cricket and nattering…which is not exactly an unusual combination of pastimes when a Lord’s.

All very enjoyable.

Friday 2 June – England v Ireland Day Two With Awesome Simo

I decided to get to Lord’s well early to secure good Tavern Stand seats for me and Simon Jacobs. I figured that the previous day’s good weather and the sunny start would make the Tavern Stand very popular, which it did.

Despite being on picnic duty which included some hand-made onion bagels from Papa Joseph’s place, I was still early enough to secure a brace of end of block seats in the second row.

Tavern Stand seats with excellent view of Jonny Bairstow’s warm-ups

I also wanted to tell Janie, pictorially, that I had arrived safe, sane & sound

Simon arrived around 11:30, but not before my row had been invaded by several real tennis “stars” in exile from our beloved court with only cricket to watch: Tony Friend, Simon Martin & (latterly) James Coley.

An engineer trying in vain properly to equip a 19th century tennis court for 21st century media.

A day of cricket is always a good opportunity to chew the fat with Simon. Or “a good old chinwag” as one of his local Hammersmith places once suggested as a raison d’être.

A Good Old Chinwag and Dinner With Simon Jacobs, Old Suffolk Punch, 10 January 2017

Unfortunately, much like the chinwag occasion, Simon simply couldn’t help himself in the matter of mentioning the names of despicable politicians, usually just after I had eaten a few mouthfuls of delicious smoked trout bagel or some of my “salad-in-a-cup” morsels. “Cruella” being the cruellest mid-mouthful blurt of the lot.

Still, we managed to get over all that and enjoy a glorious sunny day watching the cricket.

I did so little getting up and walking around on this day that I thought my right leg had utterly gone to sleep when I finally gave up on the day about 15 minutes before stumps – Simon had baled out about 10 minutes earlier. Fortunately the walk to Edgware Road tube brought my leg back to life.

I have no idea why a day of doing more or less nothing is so tiring, but I always feel in need of a long deep sleep after such a day of cricket and achieve same without any difficulty. Some people sleep during the cricket, of course, which is an entirely different matter and not usually my thing.

Saturday 3 June – England v Ireland Day Three With Daisy

We might only be here for six balls

We had no idea what to expect of Day Three. The result was pretty much no longer in doubt, but we wondered whether Ireland might collapse within an hour or make a day of it. They did the latter, very well.

We got to Lord’s well early, mostly to get a decent parking space rather than a decent seat but the early arrival meant that we achieved both.

That allowed us plenty of time to observe the England team warming up and interacting with the crowd.

Josh Tongue

Matty Potts

Chris Woakes

Chris & Ollie

We need help to identify these three. Any ideas?

Early morning autograph hunters

We did a bit of strolling around but mostly watched the cricket during the hours of play and chose to stroll during the lunch interval. The place was busy but not heaving on Day Three.

Daisy’s mum, The Duchess, seems to be moonlighting as a fast food outlet

I ran into yet another of my real tennis pals, Alastair Robson, during a pit stop, or “in the jacks” as Alastair so politely put it. Janie and I chatted with him for a while before the resumption, although we’ll hopefully have plenty of time to chat with him in Leamington in less than two week’s time on our way to Edgbaston.

The match even went on until tea, during which time, while politely putting away most of our things as the end was clearly nigh, I also did a bit of stretching.

A dedicated follower of fashion at tea

When England took the final wicket we made our escape ahead of the crowds, realising that a lead of 11 runs was not going to take much hunting down.

Here’s a link to the scorecard and other Cricinfo resources on the match.

We’d had a glorious day in the sun…

…I’d had best part of three such days.

Not the most competitive match ever but a very enjoyable few days at Lord’s.

Blooming Heck I Was Out A Lot That Week, 23 to 26 May 2023

Thanks to David Wellbrook for the above picture of me, him & Rohan Candappa

Tuesday 23 May – Brasserie Zédel With Wellbrook & Candappa

I’ve known Rohan Candappa & David Wellbrook for very nearly 50 years now. Rohan is very good at keeping in touch and occasionally just saying, “let’s meet” and/or “there’s something I want to chat through with you fellas”.

We responded to the call. David booked Brasserie Zédel, a favourite place of his. As it happens, I had wanted to try the place for some time, ever since I discovered that my grandfather, Lew Marcus, worked there for decades as a barber in the Regent Palace Hotel, rising to the giddy heights of manager I am told:

Turn It Up To Max & Spit: The Baltic Origins Of My Mother’s (Marcus) Family Revealed

Lew’s older brother Max no doubt played music there on occasions, although David de Groot’s Piccadilly Hotel Orchestra was his main gig.

The interior is like an Art Deco fantasy. Here’s a link to someone else’s photo of the glitz.

Anyway, we were there to chew the fat, catch up and the like. I think I have persuaded Rohan and David to provide some “Fifty Years Ago” reflections on the opening overs of our Alleyn’s School career, as I remember so little about the very early days and didn’t start my diary until January 1974.

Rohan wanted to discuss his thoughts on positive proposals following his extensive fundraising around mental health, not least reframing the language used around that subject.

It became a little difficult to have profound conversation once the jazz trio got started. With two of them sporting flat caps, I thought they might name themselves “Jazz & Dave”.

Always good to catch up with those two. Good food & drink at that place too.

Wednesday 24 May – Kapara With John White

My turn to choose, John’s turn to pay. I Googled for new restaurants that are getting rave reviews and soon landed on Kapara, ironically located just across the way from the slightly crazy Manette Street Shule where my father’s family hung out in the 1920s.

The Only Known Relic Of Grandpa Harris Reaches Its Hundredth Birthday, October 2022

The service was sweet and attentive (apart from one lad who kept approaching our table with other table’s dishes) and the food excellent.

They are big on small plates there, which made the tasting menu a sensible way to try the place out.

This is a link to a similar set menu to the one we ate. Ours had bream rather than snapper and didn’t have the soup.

Always great to catch up with John – it had been a while so we had a bit of catching up to do. But we shall be seeing each other again within the month, along with “the girls” and Pady. Part of our catching up comprised planning that gathering.

Thursday 25 May – Lord’s For Sunrisers v South East Stars & Middlesex v Surrey, With Janie

Cullen Bowls To The Curran Brothers

Our plan, which more or less worked, was to get to Lord’s around 15:00 and watch as much of the double-header as took our fancy. The weather smiled on us, for sure, so we took root in Janie’s favourite place, the pavilion sun deck.

In truth, the afternoon women’s game, between the Sunrisers and South East Stars, was somewhat of a damp squib, both in terms of the cricket and also the atmosphere…or lack thereof. Midweek afternoon games work great when youngsters are off school. In term time, the timing virtually guaranteed a tiny crowd before the evening.

A reasonable number of member stalwarts (MCC and MCCC) turned up for both matches, but there was almost no atmosphere for the women’s match, which is a shame.

There was a decent (but not full) crowd for the Middlesex v Surrey fixture.

Anyway, we were enjoying ourselves. But the Surrey score batting first seemed high and the chill of the evening was starting to tell, so we decided to go home and watch the almost inevitable ending of the match on TV.

You probably don’t want to see the scorecards but here they are anyway:

Sunrisers v South East Stars

Middlesex v Surrey

Friday 26 May – Dedanists v Jesters At The Queen’s Club

I was delighted to be selected again to represent The Dedanists in this absolutely crucial real tennis fixture with The Jesters.

If anyone from Alleyn’s School is still reading at this juncture, you might be interested to know that the very first Jesters fixture was in late 1928 – a Rugby Fives match between the nascent Jesters and Alleyn Old Boys.

Actually, in truth, this is one of those fixtures where half the people playing are members of both clubs and half the time it’s hard to work out who is representing which club. Indeed on this occasion I found myself (together with Simon Cripps) playing for the Dedanists but playing against our team captain, Martin Village, who paired up with Anton Eisdell.

I’m glad to say I managed to maintain a winning streak in the matter of match play in Dedanists fixtures at Queen’s, having recently lost my Lowenthal Trophy crown there to, amongst others, Mr Eisdell. The piece linked here and below also describes this Jesters fixture from last year.

Finally…Unprecedented Success At Tennis, The Queen’s Club, 11 May & 27 May 2022

It was a thoroughly delightful afternoon and evening – my first (but hopefully not last) opportunity to partner Simon Cripps – who kept getting me out of trouble and who in truth was the key to our success as a pair. Also an opportunity to meet and chat with lots of delightful and interesting people.

It also gave me the opportunity to check up on the progress of the seats I have booked for me and Janie to enjoy the Wednesday of Queen’s this year.

Ah yes, coming on nicely.

Dumbo’s Near Death Experience, Early May, 2023

Daisy comforts Dumbo who thinks he’s being taken to The Scrubbs (behind)

Dumbo The Suzuki Jimny had been a bit under the weather ever since his visit to Sussex in March with an unbalanced new tyre:

A Long Weekend In Sussex, Using A Petworth v Dedanists Tennis Match As The Excuse, 25 to 28 March 2023

The garage couldn’t find anything wrong with him, but he felt a bit sluggish, especially when attempting to drive uphill.

Dumbo’s Adventures In Essex, 2 May 2023

I had arranged to have a couple of practice games with my doubles partner Howard, ahead of the Dedanists’ Trophy this year. One was at Lord’s in April, the second we arranged at Howard’s home court, Prested Hall in Essex.

Noddyland sunset with Dumbo just visible in the foreground

Did the above stunning sunset outside our window foreshadow trouble soon to come? No.

However, almost as soon as I got going at pace in the direction of Prested, Dumbo’s amber hazard light came on and I sensed the sluggishness above 50 mph. By that time I was committed to the M25 route, on which going above 50-60 mph is rarely an option anyway.

A good game of real tennis doubles with a really friendly bunch of people. Then after coffee and a bun, I set off on a Byrd watching trail.

Ingatestone Hall (closed on a Tuesday)

First stop, Ingatestone Hall, but I had picked the wrong day of the week. A large coach outside with a waiting driver suggested that some pilgrims had managed a private view that day. The place was the home of the Petre family. Sir William Petre even has his own Byrd Pavan & Galliard.

Just a few miles down the road, Stondon Massey, where William Byrd lived. I took some refreshments in the pub and got my bearings – then drove on to the 12th Century Church where Byrd was almost certainly laid to rest.

Hey – are you looking at my Byrd?

I decided to limp home on A-roads and the North Circular rather than risk Dumbo on the M25, although by the time I had filled up with petrol the amber light had gone off and Dumbo seemed less sluggish.

Interim Verdict On Dumbo – Nothing To See Here, 3 May 2023

Dumbo seemed fine taking me and Janie to Boston Manor to play modern tennis.

Well played, Dumbo

We took him in to see Derek at Smallbills who surmised that the amber warning light was probably a falsey, as it rectified itself. This seemed logical.

Next Day, Absolutely Fine Until…

I headed off to Lord’s the next day for a short lesson and game of real tennis. All seemed fine with Dumbo until I turned onto the A40 at Gypsy Corner, at which point, in the middle lane, Dumbo decided that 5mph was his absolute maximum.

There are times of day when 5mph on the A40 would be just fine. This wasn’t one of those times. The road was not so busy as to keep the traffic at a snail’s pace, but busy enough to make my predicament hair-raising. I had the presence of mind to put my hazards on and quite quickly managed to get into the slow lane. I also worked out that, unless I stopped completely, I should limp to Savoy Circus and turn off at Old Oak Common Lane, from whence I could hopefully limp onto Du Cane Road and take stock there.

Taking stock basically comprised paying for Dumbo to park for the rest of the day and going about my planned business for a few hours by Uber.

Picture produced in collaboration with Dall-E

Dall-E’s image choices for my description reminds me that the situation could have been much worse. Also reminds me that I should have specified “Black Suzuki Jimny”.

Mr Uber got me to Lord’s and on court just five minutes late and I had a good game after my short lesson. My friend Bill, who is a fellow Ealingista, kindly gave me a lift back to Dumbo, from whence I phoned the AA, grabbed some refreshments from the local cafe and waited.

The AA app repeatedly told me that someone would be with me in 40 minutes…for about an hour.

An Impromptu London Cricket Trust Inspection On Wormwood Scrubbs

There is an adage that, in London, you are never more than 10 feet away from a rat. This adage is almost certainly untrue. But, in similar vein, I started to wonder whether you are never more than 10 minutes walk from a London Cricket Trust (LCT) cricket facility.

My trusty smart phone confirmed my suspicions – indeed I was only 10 minutes walk away from the non-turf pitch we (LCT) installed on Wormwood Scrubbs a couple of years ago.

With a 40 minute wait still showing on my app and a yearning to stretch my legs and see a cricket pitch, I strode away from Dumbo, walked the length of the Scrubbs and inspected the pitch.

The Scrubbs was very quiet around 5:30 pm

Then back to Dumbo and a few minutes later a nice AA chap named Mathew who concluded that Dumbo would need the full recovery treatment. Daisy was on standby to recover me and take me back to the house where we awaited the call from the recovery vehicle man. It was about 10:00 when we got that call.

Janie reassures Dumbo despite Wormwood Scrubbs Nick in the background

Dumbo was very scared when he was being hauled onto the recovery vehicle. I think he imagined that he was in trouble and being taken to Wormwood Scrubbs nick. (Dumbo does have some previous, albeit misunderstandings, with the law).

A Net At Lord’s After Dumbo Nearly Gets Into Trouble, As Reported By Dumbo on King Cricket, 22 July 2015

In truth Dumbo was being taken back to Smallbills, who had been forewarned to expect to find him outside their gates in the morning.

Dumbo Redux, Queen’s & Cityland, 10 & 11 May 2023

Coincidentally, word reached me that Dumbo was all better when I was at Queen’s, playing in the tournament for which I had been preparing on those ill-fated trips.

“A completely collapsed cat” apparently, but no animals were hurt in the repairing of Dumbo. A relief that the problem was readily identifiable and entirely fixable.

It was a day of coincidences at Queen’s. It’s a wonderful thing that e-tickets can be supplied to you through the ether wherever in the world you might be. Janie’s and my tickets for the Wednesday of Queen’s came through to me while I was at Queen’s.

I thought I’d pop outside to take a look at my seats, but, like a 1970s hotel in Spain, my seats were still work in progress.

Come the day they’ll be lovely.

The next day, I rescued Dumbo in the morning. The whole street must have wanted to welcome him home, because for the first time in as long as I can remember, the parking space outside my “Cityland” residence was waiting for him.

Sluggish no more – please keep going, Dumbo.

Lord’s At The Start Of The Cricket Season, 6 April 2023

Actually I visited Lord’s twice in the short week before Easter and on both occasions played real tennis.

Given the weather and my other activities, I got more tennis than cricket during those visits.

On the Tuesday, before the start of the cricket season, I had a really good game of doubles, partnering Graham Findlay for the first time and taking on some strong opponents. On paper we should have received some handicap but we played level and still prevailed over 90 minutes. The best I can remember me playing for a long time; perhaps the best I have ever played. Sadly, the CCTV camera stopped running a couple of seconds into our slot, so all I can show of the historic event is this warm-up shot from the hazard end.

Meanwhile Charley “The Gent Malloy” and I had planned to spend the first day of the season at Lord’s together, a bit of a tradition and, with Middlesex playing Essex, a desirable fixture for us both too. But Chas had to withdraw from the planned meet, so I arranged to play tennis first thing with a view to seeing a bit of cricket afterwards, all being well.

Another really good game of doubles, with an opportunity to partner Nick Evans for the first time since goodness-knows-when. Also a chance to play with Bill Taylor again, who was back on court playing competitively after quite a long absence. Again, we played level against the odds for my pairing. This time we lost by a smidgeon. I’d rather not talk about the four set points that went begging, nor my duff call on the opponents’ set point. Again I played well, I felt, but not as well as I had played on the Tuesday.

When I emerged from the dressing room, I ran into Ed Griffiths, Harry Whiteley and Arfan Akram from the London Cricket Trust, who were having an impromptu meeting (chat) about our next stage of activities. They asked me to join them.

In the interludes between the cricket conversation, Ed waxed lyrical about the real tennis, as only he can, suggesting it was a geriatric game, while studiously ignoring the rather good quartet from Prested Hall who were playing by then.

Ed can wax lyrical indoors and outdoors

Arfan looking quizzical – both of the above pictures from the LCT launch in Southwark Park last autumn.

Then Ed collared young Nat, our apprentice professional, asking him why he wasn’t 60 years older than he looked and then asking Nat to provide a three word description of my real tennis.

Graceful, technically gifted…

…came Nat’s spontaneous reply, which I must say I thought was a fine contribution to the debate. I’m not sure what substances (or planet) Nat is on if he actually believes that, but it was a great answer for the context.

Graceful & technically gifted the day after the Petworth Match last week

The weather then started to smile and Ed wanted to go off to take custody of a ludicrously fast and expensive car for reasons that he did explain but they got a little lost in translation. It’s probably something to do with late-onset-mid-life-crisis.

Ed made a rather disparaging remark about my car, Dumbo, perhaps unaware that Dumbo tends to hang out with ludicrously fast and expensive cars these days:

Two Lamborghinis, Dumbo & a Ferrari: in Waitrose Bayswater Car Park

But I digress.

I got to see some cricket.

I sat for a while in the Writing Room, but then really wanted to get a feel for the outdoor nature of the game, so took up a position in the Warner Stand…

Then, around 3:15, I started to realise how cold I felt and how close the time was getting to the “afternoon showers” predicted by the weather app and increasingly feeling likely. So I went home.

Still, I had played a good game of tennis, had a useful chat about the LCT (between the bants) and seen a couple of hours of cricket. That’s a pretty good day in my book.