Middlesex v Yorkshire Day One, Followed By Meet The Players, Lord’s, 9 September 2015

Charley appealing...or celebrating a year early. Many thanks to Charles Bartlett for this picture.
Charley appealing…or celebrating a year early. Many thanks to Charles Bartlett for this picture.

Good drama often subtly uses a device known as foreshadowing. Something happens early in the piece, so when the dramatic climax or denouement comes, the audience isn’t completely taken by surprise by the twist.

Bad drama does this unsubtly, perhaps showing that one of the characters has an unsecured gun, or getting two characters to tell a convoluted back story for seemingly no reason other than foreshadowing.

Anyway, with the benefit of hindsight, the climax of the 2015 season (if that is the right way to describe it) beautifully and subtly foreshadowed the extraordinary climax to the 2016 season – reported here.

In many ways, the climax was all on Day One. Personally, because that was to be my last cricket of the year, accompanied that day by Charles (Charley “The Gent” Malloy) Bartlett. But also because Yorkshire clinched the title that day, by virtue of something that happened on some other cricket ground at some point during the afternoon. It was all a bit confusing for us spectators, who weren’t officially told by the announcer until tea, although many were listening to internet radio accounts from elsewhere, so word soon spread.

To some extent Charles’s presence was foreshadowing of day one of the same fixture in 2016. In some ways, the first over of Middlesex’s innings – three wickets and no runs – foreshadowed the Nottinghamshire match in 2016 – click here – which Middlesex also (despite the three wickets for zip setback) went on to win.

I wrote up this day for King Cricket as long ago as April 2016, but at the time of writing this piece (November 2016) the piece is as yet unpublished. I’ll add an update and a link here once he publishes.

Postscript – naturally, not much more than a week after I Ogblogged this piece, King Cricket published that article – click here.

At the Meet the Players party in the evening, which was splendid, I suggested that the Middlesex folk should encourage the Yorkshire celebrations. I don’t think my advice was heeded, but I also don’t think the Yorkshire players needed encouragement. Despite Middlesex being on the ropes at the end of Day One, we somehow snatched victory from the very jaws of defeat in this match.

Foreshadowing again.

Here is a link to the Cricinfo scorecard for this 2015 match.

And here is a link again to the equivalent fixture the following year. Just in case you don’t know, the match result was the same, but the County Championship result was splendiforously different in 2016.

 

Work Rest and Play described by Dumbo, King Cricket Report, 12 August 2015

My deal with King Cricket is basically that I write what I want, when I want. The reciprocal part of the deal is that he’ll publish what he wants (almost all of it) when he wants (perhaps months or years later).

So it is often a pleasant surprise when one of my older pieces pops up out of the blue, as this one did on 9 January 2017, to remind me what I was up to back on 12 August 2015 – click here to read the King Cricket piece.

Just in case anything ever happens to King Cricket, I have scraped the above page – to here.

Dumbo, my normally law-abiding Suzuki Jimny (although he does think that he is a horse) tells this tale.

Picture from one of Dumbo’s other adventures, on a day which did not go quite so well.

This piece was, for Dumbo, the conclusion of a small build (through several adventures) towards him getting inside Lord’s and actually seeing the ground.

…so the 12 August 2015 net visit evening proved most exciting for Dumbo, as he actually did make it into Lord’s – click here to go straight to the King Cricket piece.

One of the ironies of all this, of course, is that Dumbo has subsequently become a regular visitor to Lord’s Cricket Ground, when I visit Middlesex CCC for meetings and/or the real tennis court. On quieter days, Dumbo sometimes even gets to park with a view of the hallowed turf itself. On such days, I think I detect Dumbo getting quite dewey-windscreened.

Still, nothing a short blast of air conditioning can’t put right.

 

England v Australia, Third Test, Edgbaston, Days Two and Three, 30 and 31 July 2015

I explained in the preceding entry, about our travel day, that Ivan Meagreheart (my smart phone) wrote the Edgbaston Test match reports for King Cricket in 2015.

England v Australia at Edgbaston Test – day one match report

Ivan The Smart Phone Reporting
Ivan The Smart Phone Reporting

This is a link to Ivan’s Day Two match report, which was published by King Cricket on 22 June 2016.

England v Australia at Edgbaston – day two match report

Just in case anything ever happens to King Cricket, here is a scrape of that day two report.

This is a link to Ivan’s Day Three match report, which was published by King Cricket on 11 July 2016.

Just in case anything ever happens to King Cricket, here is a scrape of that day three report.

I couldn’t have put this stuff better myself…

…no, really…

…so I think I should simply let Ivan tell the tale.

A link to the scorecard might help demystify the material for the less well-informed reader – here.

Everybody loves a happy ending.

A Net At Lord’s After Dumbo Nearly Gets Into Trouble, As Reported By Dumbo on King Cricket, 22 July 2015

King Cricket published Dumbo’s report of almost surreal happenings on the way to Lord’s, click here.

My conversation with the police and Dumbo’s paranoia combined makes Kafka read like a level-headed guy’s straightforward narrative.

An irony of all this, as I write this up for Ogblog some nine months after the event, is that Dumbo is now a surprisingly regular feature at Lord’s, what with the Middlesex strategy (work) and real tennis (rest and play).

Was-It-Because-Im-Black
Was It Because I’m Black?

For collectors of the Dumbo pieces (there must be loads of you out there – don’t be shy about it), this is Dumbo’s third report; the previous two in reverse order are:

Dumbo fans can also rest assured that this piece is not the last word from Dumbo; there are two more 2015 pieces by Dumbo which will be Ogblogged once King Cricket has done his worst with them.

Essex v Australians at Chelmsford, Day 2, 2 July 2015

A day out in Chelmsford, reported upon at length on the King Cricket website.

This season my possessions are taking an increasing role in proceedings, writing many of my King Cricket match reports for me.  Dumbo, the Suzuki Jimny started this trend while we were in Ireland – click here.  Dumbo continued this trend on a half-day out to Uxbridge, linked through this posting here.  There will be more to come from Dumbo, once King Cricket gets around to publishing it.

Ivan The Smart Phone Reporting
Ivan The Smart Phone Reporting

But the report on the Chelmsford day was a first airing for Ivan the Smart Phone, my iPhone 5.  He tells you almost everything you might want to know about that day out, in a rather logical style – here. Indeed there will also be plenty more to come from Ivan.

To understand my King Cricket match reports you need to know that:

  • Ged and Daisy are nicknames/noms de plume for me and Janie. Friends are all referred to pseudonymously;
  • King Cricket match reports have strict rules: “If it’s a professional match, on no account mention the cricket itself. If it’s an amateur match, feel free to go into excruciating detail.”

If you do want to know about the cricket itself, you might want to have a look at the on-line scorecard – here.  Essex did rather well the day we went, perhaps foreshadowing problems to come for the Aussies that year, but we really didn’t spot the weakness at the time, that delightful day in Chelmsford.

Cocktails For Two, England v New Zealand Lord’s Test Day 2, King Cricket Match Report, 22 May 2015

King Cricket published the match report for this day in September 2015 – click here to read it.

Not much to add or explain.  I started a running gag about Charley “The Gent” Malloy’s bottle of wine in this earlier piece.  But apart from that, nothing fancy or obscure.

King Cricket match reports have strict rules: “If it’s a professional match, on no account mention the cricket itself. If it’s an amateur match, feel free to go into excruciating detail.”

If you do want to know about the cricket itself, you might want to have a look at the on-line scorecard – here. New Zealand were making hay that day and it looked like one of those Lord’s tests that could only end up a draw unless England messed-up the third innings – how wrong we were. Of course the King Cricket report is silent on such details.

First of the Summer Whine, King Cricket Match report, Middlesex v Nottinghamshire Day 2, 13 April 2015

King Cricket published this piece in July 2015 – click here or below to read it:

First of the summer whine – Middlesex v Nottinghamshire match report

If anything by chance ever happens o the King Crciekt site, that piece is scraped to here.

It is a pretty self-explanatory piece and gives no clues towards the mayhem that would later break out in my 2015 match reports, with my possessions increasingly taking over the report writing role. Frankly, the idea had not yet occurred to me.

The only idea for a runner that crops up in this report was Charley “the Gent” Malloy’s forgetfulness regarding the bottle of wine. I guessed that the “offending and delicious sounding bottle would somehow never quite find its way to be downed in part by me. I could be wrong, but in April 2016 let’s just say that I’m still waiting.

To understand my King Cricket match reports you need to know that:

  • Ged and Daisy are nicknames/noms de plume for me and Janie. Friends are all referred to pseudonymously;
  • King Cricket match reports have strict rules: “If it’s a professional match, on no account mention the cricket itself. If it’s an amateur match, feel free to go into excruciating detail.”

If you want to know what actually happened in the match and on the day we visited, then click here and scrutinise the scorecard. It wasn’t one of Middlesex’s more glorious days.

Middlesex v Nottinghamshire Match Preview, King Cricket Piece, 10 April 2015

This King Cricket piece was published in June 2015 – click here to read the piece.

Titfer and Provisions
Titfer and Provisions

The piece pretty much speaks for itself. It was a heartfelt, if slightly tongue in cheek, tribute to Richie Benaud, who died on the day I was preparing to go to the cricket with Charley “the Gent” Malloy for the first time in 2015.

In all seriousness, I asked Janie if she thought it was in bad taste. She used to treat Daphne Benaud and had met Richie several times. Janie thought that the piece would have appealed to Richie’s sense of humour. But she didn’t think that Richie would attempt to use self-service checkout machines in supermarkets.

 

An End Of Season Visit To Lord’s With Charley The Gent, Middlesex v Durham, 9 September 2014

Madeleines de Commercy

Most of the story of this visit is captured in the following King Cricket piece, published in April 2015:

If by any chance anything ever happens to the King Cricket site, here’s a scrape of that Proust-inspired piece.

Not only had the season flown by in a “lost time” manner, that day and evening similarly flew by.

There was a meet the players party in the evening which, if I recall correctly, was quite well attended by Durham guests as well as Middlesex players that year. Did Chas and I manage a quick chat with Colly at that one? Chas might remember.

And talking of remembrance of things past, the match turned out to be one to forget from a Middlesex point of view – see Cricinfo details here.

England v Sri Lanka Day 2 Lord’s Test Match, King Cricket Match Report, 13 June 2014

A day at the test match with three friends.

I went for an unusual and foodie menu for this match, partly because Alastair “Big Al DeLarge” Little was originally supposed to be part of our group, partly because I was also catering for the next day, when Daisy attended – click here for that report.

I wrote up this day 2 in a King Cricket stylee, which was published later that year on the King Cricket site – a report which tells you pretty much all you need to know about the day – click here...

…except that that report does not include details about the The Lord’s Throdkin, which was launched that day and which I wrote up separately for King Cricket – published here...

…and also of course King Cricket reports don’t talk about the cricket itself. So unless I insert a few points here you wouldn’t know that:

  • We saw Joe Root take his score from just over 100 to 200 – you don’t get to witness live many double-hundreds in your life. Charley and I were still shaking from the thought of having witnessed Ian Bell’s 199 at the same ground six years earlier;
  • Nigel “Jim Hawkins” Thorpe teased me when I suggested that Liam Plunkett could bat – I think Charley joined in the teasing, so I was very pleased when Plunkett demonstrated his batting skills with a nice cameo;
  • There were two players named Jayawardene playing for Sri Lanka that match. We tried to get a chant of “two Jayawardenes, there are only two Jayawardenes” going, but strangely that idea didn’t take off at Lord’s. Pity, really.

Here’s the scorecard if you are that interested.

I think the King Cricket report is more interesting – certainly more fun – here’s the link again.