Tag: MCC

The MCC Real Tennis Club Weekend & Related Potty Adventures, 31 January To 2 February 2025

Scrubbed up for the Friday evening bash – photo by Jonathan Ellis-Miller

This year’s Ogblog report on this wonderful MCC event is authored by a special correspondent, “Two Loos” Le Trek, who chooses to write up my experience in the first person. My noms de plume are getting out of hand.

Build Up & Day One: Friday 31 January 2025

I received a somewhat excited WhatsApp from Giles Stogdon just over two weeks before the event. He’d learned that we’d been drawn to partner each other. We agreed that we were both pleased with that idea and found an opportunity to partner for an hour of doubles before the weekend, as we have recently spent more time opposing one another than partnering.

We both found ourselves in Group B again this year. I wrote about my sense of imposter syndrome when finding myself in the B group last year…

The MCC Tennis Weekend 2024: The Secret Diary Of Ian Harris Aged 61 and 5/12ths, 26 to 28 January 2024

…this year I had no trouble banishing the negative thoughts, other than my slight concern that my mobility issues resulting from my cartilage-free hip might hamper me in battle with the high-achievers that populate Group B.

Anyway, I threw myself into practice and match play in the run up to the 2025 tournament:

Having Used It Up & Worn It Out (My Right Hip, I Mean)…Two Real Tennis Matches At Lord’s In Quick Succession: MCC v Old Harrovians & MCC v Dedanists, 22 & 25 January 2025

On arrival – quite late in the morning Friday as our two matches spanned lunchtime – I plonked myself in the pavilion home dressing room, as the tennis dressing room was heaving by then.

The Captain’s place remained available for me…again!

My Ged Ladd persona has written about this phenomenon elsewhere:

Real tennis paraphernalia in a cricket place

But let us return to the club weekend tennis.

Unlike regular matches and tournaments, the club weekend comprises vignette matches, played on the clock for 25 minutes including changeover and warm-up. When the alarm goes, only completed games count.

On Day One, Giles & I got off to a slow yet solid start. We drew our first round robin match, against Iain Harvey & Roger Davis, but managed to prevail in our second match against Nick Davidson & Paul Wickman.

I have scraped my matches (along with some highlights of the whole tournament for the “official” match report) onto YouTube.

If you are sufficiently potty, you might choose to watch some or all of the play in these YouTube films.

A Sufficiently Potty Subplot: A Tale Of Two Shitties

Peter Luck-Hille, a doyen of real tennis if ever there was one, has, in the last year, been through the hip replacement process. He has provided me with lots of helpful advice over the past few months.

Peter kindly offered to lend me his raised toilet seats, which are an absolute must, at least for the first few days or weeks at home, until the recovering leg is comfortably mobile enough for a normal-height toilet seat.

“No point you buying them – you’ll not need them for long”, said Peter.

Peter was due to play in the tournament, so we planned to shift the bulky goods from car boot to car boot on the Friday of the tournament.

But plans sometimes go awry. Unbeknown to me, Peter was poorly in the run up to the tournament and withdrew. Despite his indisposition, he kindly transported the seats to Lord’s earlier in the week, where they adorned the pros office in the run up to the tournament.

Chris Bray accosted me as soon as he saw me and asked, as politely as only he is able, to get those hideous things out of the pros office as soon as possible. He said they were lowering the tone of the place.

“Don’t you mean raising the tone?”, I said, “they are certainly in the business of raising something”.

We agreed that I would shift the items into my car after I had played my Friday afternoon matches.

I didn’t particularly want to be seen struggling through reception and into Car Park No 6 with those items, so I picked what I thought was a tactically smart time to do the deed – towards the end of the rubber after mine, when most of the players who were still around would be watching.

Yet somehow, despite my seemingly cunning timing, I was of course destined to bump into friends while I did the deed. Piers Vacher, for example, and Rob Stain, the latter bringing some nominative determinism to this comedy of embarrassment.

“If only I had my camera with me”…

…said, Rob, kindly.

I changed and stopped over at the flat Friday night into Saturday morning. The loo seats remained in the back of my car, covered with tarpaulin, until I returned to the house on Saturday evening. For some inexplicable reason, I chose not to schlep two loo seats up into the flat on Friday afternoon and then back down again on Saturday.

On arrival at the house, where Janie sanitised them. If she could have fitted them in her autoclave, she’d have autoclaved them.

Not their final resting place, obviously, but where Pu & Pi (as they are now named) await action.

The Friday Evening Bash – Concluding With A Differently Potty Tale

Me with Clive Picton, photo by Jonathan Ellis-Miller

On Friday evening, dinner in the Committee Dining Room was great. I sat next to Clive Picton on one side and Tony Joyce on the other – both people I have played with and chatted with over the years but had not caught up with for a while.

The food was very good, as usual. A smoked salmon fillet thing with interesting garnish as a starter, a chicken supreme with mushroom sauce and trimmings as the main and a crumble of some description for afters…

…can you tell that I forgot to grab one of the menus as I left?

The after dinner speech was by realist Lindsay MacDuff, aka The Culture Colonel, then cheese, port, coffee, chocolates and all that. I was quite abstemious by the standards of most, but not THAT abstemious given the special occasion.

I was among the last few to leave, yet knew nothing that night about the curious…some might say potty…incident that occurred at the end of the evening. I learnt about it the next day from Jonathan Ellis-Miller.

Set in the Lord’s pavilion…

The Mouse Cricket Caper is a lovely book, authored by MCC member and realist Mark Trenowden, set in the Lord’s pavilion. The climax of the story depends on an unfortunate incident on the night after the traditional MCC v Melbourne match in July 2013, in which a comedic MCC member named McCrackers gets locked in a pavilion toilet and then, after breaking out of the loo and into the pavilion proper, witnesses the pivotal match between the Lord’s pavilion mice and a team of chancer rats.

In truth, I found it hard to suspend belief at the bit where McCrackers gets locked in the toilet, as I have always imagined the stewarding to be especially sharp about making certain that the pavilion has been vacated.

Yet, somehow, at our event, Nigel Smith and Piers Vacher conspired inadvertently to get themselves locked outside on the Committee Dining Room balcony at the end of the evening. Apparently they were enjoying one last crafty cigarette and admiring the beauty of the ground while doing so.

This picture by Janie from two floors further down, February 2023

Fortunately the story has a happy, albeit comedic ending, as Nigel & Piers were able to alert staff who were still clearing up inside and escape relatively unfrozen. It would have been a long cold night stuck out there, that’s for sure.

I haven’t asked either Nigel or Piers if they saw any rats or mice during their lock-in adventure. In any case, they might not be reliable witnesses to their own perception of murine match play (or lack thereof) at that late stage of the evening’s libations.

Day Two: Sweet Success, But With Cats Set Amongst Pigeons, Will It Be Enough?

Never mind fictional rats and mice, metaphorical cats started to scurry around metaphorical pigeons very early in Day Two – long before Group B combatants started to do battle that day.

In elite Group A, two pairs Rufus Parkes & George Dickson, plus Tony Joyce & Foreman Wickes had shown very strongly on Day One, with Ben Martin & Kate Evers also showing well. On the Friday evening, I suggested that the matches between those three pairs, plus the match in which Ben Martin’s pair would do battle with his dad’s pair, Simon Martin & Ronald Paterson, were to be “the popcorn matches” of the round robin stage.

Unfortunately, as I settled down with my metaphorical popcorn at the flat to watch the stream on Saturday morning…it was more like cornflakes than popcorn in truth…Foreman Wickes sustained a horrible-looking forearm injury during warm up. Foreman bravely laboured through the bout and Paul Cattermull kindly stepped in to take his place in the subsequent matches, but that incident really opened up Group A.

Group D was relatively cat and pigeon free, with two pairs, Adrian Fox & Anton Eisdell, plus Sebastian Maurin & Brian Woodbridge, showing strongly on Day One and continuing to shine on Day Two. There were plenty of close matches though, not least a third pairing, Douglas Brewster and David Shannon, who stayed close to the top two throughout the tournament and pulled off more draws than…[insert your own, potentially politically incorrect, metaphor here].

It was the first Group B match of Day Two that sent my group into a “cats among pigeons” maelstrom, when Davidson & Wickman defeated Lay and Wise in an exciting and well fought round robin match, opening up the group to all manner of possibilities, not least that those two teams might now be the ones to progress.

Similarly, in Group C, two pairs – Piers Vacher & Peter Brunner plus Ben Havey & Sam Walker had shown strongly on Day One, with fancied pair Matt Glyn & Andrew Hinds narrowly defeated by the latter of those pairs late on Friday. But the first Group C game on Saturday, between reigning champions Brunner & Vacher v Glyn & Hinds, was another thriller which ended in defeat for reigning pair.

Is it possible that the near miss on the Committee Dining Room balcony affected Messrs Vacher and Smith the next day? Neither of them recorded a win with their respective partners on the Saturday.

In truth, Nigel Smith might look to his partner, Jonathan Ellis-Miller and wonder what might have been against me and Giles Stogdon that afternoon, had Jonathan tried a less forceful style. Giles and I had agreed that, if we lost the toss, Giles would take Nigel’s serve (which often requires twisting to the backhand side) and I would take Jonathan’s, not least because Jonathan was bound to try and hit my serve to kingdom come. After the event, word is, Jonathan had promised Nigel that he intended to do just that. What could possibly go wrong?

It was actually a very close match, but the percentages were, I’d suggest, in our favour, given the predictable attacking approach. Ellis-Miller hit three grilles in the above short match. I managed one grille but also achieved a chase off when chasing better than half-a-yard. I think it is only the second time I have ever landed on better than half-a-yard to win or neutralise a chase. The other occasion, which won the chase, got me a bottle of champagne in my first ever Lowenthal Trophy appearance in 2019. #justsayin.

The Dedanists’ Society Annual Handicap Doubles, AGM & Dinner, The Queen’s Club, 30 October 2019

Returning to Lord’s in February 2025, Giles Stogdon and I knew that our match against Giles Pemberton & George Richards, towards the end of Day Two, would be a “more or less must win” rubber.

It was a nail-biter of a match which we did, narrowly, win:

Thus, we went home at the end of Day Two with three wins and a draw, but still we knew that we would probably need one or two points off Lay and Wise the next day to qualify.

Day Three: Dénouements Aplenty

I must have been in a state of great excitement first thing that morning. I wanted to watch the stream for a while, not least the first match of the day. Had Pemberton & Richards overcome Davidson & Wickman, it would have resulted in my pair being guaranteed a semi-final place. But it wasn’t to be. We would need a draw or a win.

Janie left for her Samaritans shift while that first match was in progress, suggesting that she might get more sense out of her callers than she was getting out of me that morning. Fair point.

I continued pottering at home and watching the stream, even catching the excellent “father against son” popcorn match…more like a fistful of kikones in my case to be honest… that was S Martin & Paterson v Evers and B Martin…

…which was a very good match. There were strange clattering noises off, coming from the side gallery, as the players left the court (see the end of the above film). Both Simon & Ben Martin deny that it was argy-bargy between them. They have clearly paid off the witnesses, as Andrew Hinds claims, unconvincingly, that the noise arose when he sent a few water bottles flying while trying to do that “pass people in the side gallery” thing. Hard to imagine, that.

As I had done on both the other days, I went to Lord’s via BodyWorksWest, my health club, to do some stretching and warm up ahead of battle. By so doing, I was spared the sight of the second “father against son” match of the morning, S Glyn & Boys-Stones v M Glyn & Hinds, which very unfortunately resulted in the latter pair needing to withdraw, despite having qualified for the semis, when Matt incurred a nasty injury on court. Hopefully Matt’s young body will heal fast. Alex Gibson & Rob Stain qualified in their place and did well to reach the C/D final.

Our last round robin match was, to all intents and purposes, a quarter-final for an A/B semi-final place, from which a draw would have been good enough for us, whereas it was a must win game for Lay and Wise.

It was a really good game. We stayed close, getting to 3-3 and at one stage were a couple of points away from pulling off a win, but it was not to be for me and Giles Stogdon. Still, an honourable third in Group B and getting to within two points of topping our group and a semi-final place, is a pretty decent result.

After a break for some lunch, shower and change, we were ready to watch for the rest of the afternoon. We caught both of the A/B semi-finals, the C/D final and the A/B final.

Did you say you want to see those matches? OK then. All are good, but I would say that the first of the four films below – Lay & Wise v Parkes & Dickson, is the most watchable of the tournament, followed closely by the Evers & Martin v Davidson & Wickman semi-final:

Neither of the finals were quite so tight, but the spirit in the dedans gallery was terrific, with lots of people sticking around to watch, cheer and clap.

So that’s it, for now, for me. No more matches and tournaments until I am all better with my hip – hopefully just a few months.

It was a wonderful weekend – such good fun tennis, plus social time with the wonderful friends I have made through this extraordinary game.

No doubt I shall dream of all that while I sit on one or other of my elevated on-loan-thrones over the next few weeks.

And perhaps, before all the anaesthetics and sedatives have fully worn off, I might envisage teams of rats and mice playing rodent-realers against each other.

This image from DeepAI.

Having Used It Up & Worn It Out (My Right Hip, I Mean)…Two Real Tennis Matches At Lord’s In Quick Succession: MCC v Old Harrovians & MCC v Dedanists, 22 & 25 January 2025

Johnny Saunders claps my lunge winner as my hip twinges in appreciation

One of my favourite comedy sketches of all time is a Peter Cook & Dudley Moore sketch named “One Leg Too Few”. It wouldn’t pass some people’s 2025 political correctness tests, but it still passes mine. The conceit of it is a one-legged Dudley Moore auditioning for the role of Tarzan, with casting director Peter Cook dispensing a mixture of common sense discouragement and surreal encouragement to the job applicant, in a style that only Peter Cook could deliver. I recommend that you watch it on the link below.

MCC v Old Harrovians, 22 January 2025

I was reminded of this sketch when I got an unexpected call from Harsha Boralessa, who organises the traditional MCC v Old Harrovians match, less than 10 days before the 2025 fixture. I had sent Harsha a note back in August or September 2024 volunteering to represent the MCC in this fixture but had assumed that “no news means not selected” and had more or less forgotten about it.

By the time Harsha called to see if I could play, I was in the process of scheduling my right hip replacement, having ascertained that there is nothing left in my right hip that might be described as cartilage, which might explain why I am now hobbling around the court, rather than leaping around the place like a gazelle.

Your left hip is fine, Mr Harris. I’ve nothing against the cartilage in your left hip. The problem is, (by way of right hip cartilage), neither have you…

I explained my impediment to Harsha, while making it clear that, as an addict, I would like to play because I ALWAYS like the idea of playing tennis rather than not playing tennis.

Seemingly oblivious to the impediment aspect, Harsha simply said:

…but can you be there for a prompt four o’clock start?

Hence, in the absence of a two-legged applicant for the role, I got the gig.

Old Harrovians have historically been well subscribed with fine players of the hard ball games – cricket, rackets, fives and tennis.

William Hart Dyke – rackets, cricket, tennis (real and lawn)…

Modern times seems to be no exception, with the vast majority of the players in this match being both Old Harrovians and MCC members. Only two or three of us who represented the MCC were from other schools.

I had always imagined that this fixture was designed for players “above my pay grade” – i.e. with much better handicaps than mine. For sure, several of the players and some of the rubbers were far more high falutin’ affairs than I could ever manage, fit or not. Indeed, Ed Turner, who partnered me for the MCC, despite being way above my pay grade, went on to play a second rubber for the Old Harrovians against the MCC. The fellow couldn’t lose…or couldn’t fail to lose, depending on how you look on it.

But that, it seems to me, is the central premise of this fixture. A really interesting and friendly bunch of people enjoying a convivial match with the bonus of a traditional MCC curry supper to round off the evening. The fact that the quality of tennis spanned athletes with handicaps in the 20s to hobbling wrecks like me with handicaps in the 50s or 60s didn’t seem to matter a jot.

Would Edward Chandos Leigh, another Old Harrovian and MCC Chairman from that bygone era, have approved of such convivial amateur sportsmanship?

Edward Chandos Leigh, Copyright I Zingari, used under CC 3.0

You can bet your infeasibly slick hair and shiny top hat that he would have done.

MCC v Dedanists, 25 January 2025

Carl Snitcher, that match guvnor, at this very fixture five years ago

The Dedanists’ Society, like the Old Harrovians, is a peripatetic team. And much like the Old Harrovians fixture I have just described, when MCC play The Dedanists, most of the participants are eligible to play for both sides.

I first played this fixture before I was a Dedanist, in 2018. On that occasion I partnered Carl Snitcher for the MCC:

MCC v The Dedanists’ Society, Lord’s, 10 February 2018

The second time I played this fixture, in 2020, I was by then a Dedanist but was expecting to represent the MCC again. Tipped off by a friendly professional, I put both shirts into my bag just in case, which was just as well, as I found myself being a late switch onto the Dedanists’ team. My first game partnering Martin Village and my last representative match before the pandemic.

Four Courts In 25 Hours; Boston Manor Centre Court, Lord’s Real Tennis Court, Royal Court Theatre & Boston Manor Court One, 8 & 9 February 2020

No amount of “but Carl, I’m a hobbling wreck” talk was going to put Carl off from selecting me to play for The Dedanists in this match in 2025. In truth, I fancied a competitive hit ahead of the club weekend and also quite wanted Janie to see my hobble at this stage of my hip degeneration so she might help gauge my post operative progress.

I requested a late in the day match, so Janie and I might get other necessities (including an hour of “lawn”) done before Lord’s. The traffic between W3 and NW8 was ridiculous that afternoon; I allowed an extra half hour over the normal journey time of 30 minutes and we used 29-and-a-half of my 30 minute leeway.

No matter – the stress of the journey allowed me to hang up my hang-ups before the game and play pretty well by my own ordinary standards. It helped that I was partnering Johnny Saunders, who is a great competitor who nevertheless plays with a smile on his face, or “for fun” as I put it at one point in our match.

We were a set and 3-2 down as one stage, but managed to turn things around in the end, mostly by dint of Johnny getting better and better. My hobble was possibly more distracting to my opponents than it was to me. Looking at this video of the last 20 minutes of the game, I must admit that I look quite incapable of getting to the ball a lot of the time and yet somehow get just enough onto the ball, awkwardly to keep the point going.

While I’m rehabbing, if I ever have doubts about why I am replacing that hip, I should look at this video to assure myself that I couldn’t possibly go on like that for the rest of my life.

I think Janie enjoyed her afternoon at Lord’s – the Dedanists and the MCC folk who play/watch this fixture are a very friendly crowd.

Our day was rounded off by a most enjoyable evening at the Hampstead Theatre, which included a mystery post match / pre show interview.

An Interrogation by Jamie Armitage, Hampstead Theatre Downstairs, 25 January 2025

A Joyful Day Of International Real (Court) Tennis At Lord’s, Followed By Dinner, With The Burghers Of Newport Rhode Island, 13 November 2024

l to r standing: Peter, Graeme, Giles, Graham, Me, Jonathan, Piers, Chris, Nick, Paul T, Paul B-B, Kelsey, Susan, Noel, Ellen, Steve, Tony. l-r kneeling: Keith, Chris, Sarah. With thanks to Kelsey Dolan for this & other photos from the day

Long in the planning, a delegation of tennis enthusiasts from Newport, Rhode Island ventured across the pond to play real tennis (or, as they call it over there, court tennis) at the several courts in and near London. This day was their Lord’s day.

I was delighted and honoured to be selected for the MCC team, this being only my second opportunity to represent the club at international club level. My first international was actually my first ever match for the MCC, report linked here and below:

MCC v The Wanderers, Real Tennis Match, Lord’s, 10 September 2016

Newport Casino is a fascinating-sounding place, steeped in tennis history; home to the International Tennis Hall of Fame and the original location of the tournament now known as the US Open (lawn) as well as a court tennis facility and much else. Sounds like my sort of casino – I like those that aren’t gambling houses.

Perhaps it was the club’s deep links with history, perhaps it was my remembering seeing Rodin’s The Burghers of Calais in several places on my first visit to the USA in the 1980s…

In the Hirshhorn Sculpture Garden, Late November 1989

…but I’m not entirely sure why I imagined the visiting delegation in the style of the Burghers of Calais. Anyway, in an attempt to envisage our visitors a bit better before the day, I asked the DeepAI Image Generator for help:

Rodin’s The Burghers Of Calais depicted with tennis rackets in their hands, DeepAI

The picture made me laugh, although it seems that two of Rodin’s six burghers don’t play tennis and that all of them have grown “Eustache beards” since Rodin’s day. Anyway, I can safely state that our friendly and charming guests from Newport did not look like those Calais burghers. Some wags might suggest that the AI depiction suits the burghers of the Marylebone Cricket Club more than those of Newport Casino.

Giles Pemberton, looking suitably burgher-like, receiving a tribute from Tony at the end of match ceremony.

Graeme Marks presenting a ceremonial MCC ball to the visitors

Have Nick Davidson’s psychoactives just kicked in or what?

It was simply a pleasurable day. Most of the visitors were keen to see around Lord’s when they weren’t playing and several of us were similarly keen to show the visitors around.

The tennis matches, seven rubbers, were all extremely closely contested.

  • Steven Bishop & Graeme Marks  v Keith Mayer & Paul Tromby
  • Jonathan Ellis-Miller & Ollie Wise  v Steve Devoe & Chris Werner
  • Piers Vacher & Peter Brunner v Noel Shiland & Ellen Defoe
  • Ian Harris & Paul Buchanan-Barrow v Sarah Stanley & Kelsey Dolan
  • Barry Nathan & Nick Davidson v Noel Shiland & Kelsey Dolan
  • Iain Harvey & Piers Vacher v Chris Werner & Steve Devoe
  • Giles Pemberton & Graham Findlay v Keith Mayer & Paul Tromby

I don’t think I can remember an event where quite so many sets of tennis went to to deciders at 5-5.

“So what were the precise scores in each of the sets of each of the rubbers and all that”, I hear you readers cry. Well, you know what Colson Whitehead (almost) said:

What happens in Newport Casino stays in Newport Casino…

It really was one of those days when everybody won. I sensed that the visitors very much enjoyed our hospitality and the MCC team similarly thoroughly enjoyed the company of the interesting, friendly delegation from Newport.

Beyond the many interesting conversations about tennis and our respective clubs, I took great pleasure in showing several of the visitors around the ground. Kelsey, who is a softball enthusiast as well as a tennis enthusiast, took a shine to the indoor school and would really like a go at batting. Let’s arrange that for next time!

My most recent go at the indoor school, November 2022, picture by Janie

Almost all of us retreated to The Ivy on St John’s Wood High Street for some dinner. Several of the visitors were, understandably, struggling to reconcile the pronunciation and spelling of the word Marylebone. I consoled them by explaining that we’re probably all getting it wrong when we pronounce St John’s Wood, as it was most likely pronounced “sinjin’s wood” back in the day.

To cap it all, amongst the assortment of fascinating conversations we were all having over dinner, Ellen and I discovered that we have a shared interest in early music, including madrigals. She was not aware that our young professional Alex is not the earliest generation of the Hume family to sing professionally and was intrigued to learn that several of us have played with his dad, Alistair, who was a founding member of The King’s Singers. I recommended the album Madrigal History Tour to her, and/but have found a YouTube of the TV show from whence that album sprung:

There’s Alistair, second from the left

It was that sort of day and that sort of evening. Warm-hearted, interesting people finding things in common and enjoying each other’s company. We left The Ivy in a glow of high spirits…that was possibly the gemütlichkeit, but possibly it was the wine and cocktails.

Rodin’s The Burghers Of Calais depicted drinking cocktails and socialising warmly, Deep AI

Skills Night At Lord’s, 1 March 2023

The curry had to wait while I doled out a vast number of “valuable” prizes – with thanks to Tony Friend and Chris Bray for the pictures.

Putting me in charge of the real tennis skills night is a bit like putting Boris Johnson in charge of an honesty bar, or Suella Braverman in charge of a kindness campaign.

Anyway, the powers that be have deemed me suited to the task, perhaps in a bid to keep me and my tenuous relationship with tennis skills away from attempting the actual skill trials themselves. In truth I very much enjoy hosting the event.

It has become a twice-yearly thing now – once in the spring and once in the autumn, which makes sense.

While this team of three deploys its skills, you might just make me out, in the distance, badgering the next team to ready themselves

I see no point in repeating my write up for the MCC Newsletter here – you can read it through this link if you are eligible. In the unlikely event that the link doesn’t work for you but you still want to read the report, I have scraped it to here.

I did not go into detail in that match report about the vast number of valuable prizes on offer, but the following pictures might provide some clues.

Brandon appreciates winning the “close but no cigar” award

Fergus scores a cool half-million bucks as the most valuable player

Andrew Hinds presents the coveted Hinds trophy to the lowest-scoring team

The victorious trio celebrate their win

As it happens, Tony Friend’s team was victorious again this time, reprising his famous success in 2016 along with yours truly on that occasion – my first skills night and sole success as a player in the skills tournament.

Unexpected Victory Against The Odds, Mercifully Only A Real Tennis Skills Tournament At Lord’s, 8 November 2016

Book Club Evening At Lord’s: Being Geoffrey Boycott With Jon Hotten, 28 February 2023

Don’t talk to me about uncovered pitches. Pictures by Janie.

I met Geoffrey Boycott in the summer of 1969, when I had just turned seven:

A Short Holiday In Brighton, During Which I Met Geoffrey Boycott & The Yorkshire Cricket Team, 3 September 1969

I have subsequently re-met several of Geoffrey’s fellow team mates from that 1969 team, but not Geoffrey himself.

No matter. I was interested to hear what writer Jon Hotten had to say about writing this book with Geoffrey and was delighted to get the opportunity to do so at a book/supper club for MCC members, which allowed me also to bring Janie as a guest.

The event was held in the writing room (appropriately – also possibly my favourite room in the pavilion).

The Lord’s pitch looks astonishing at night. When Janie and I first looked, there was a fox meandering in that lit area, but it meandered away before Janie was able to photograph it:

Uncovered

The indifference of that refined fox (you get a better class of vulpine in St John’s Wood) has subsequently found its way to the King Cricket website:

A fox being conspicuously indifferent to Being Geoffrey Boycott

If anything ever goes awry with the King Cricket website, you can find read that piece here.

Nice grub and good company before the book talk:

Jon Hotten and Geoffrey Boycott have previously done their book launch talks as a double act, but Geoffrey was not available for this one. In some ways, that made it more interesting, because Jon was able to talk to us about the process of working with Geoffrey, whom he hadn’t met before being “interviewed” for the role of co-author on this project. I suspect that we’d have heard little from Jon had Geoffrey been there.

Jon Hotten seems like a gentle individual, who warmed to his subject/co-author while recognising that Geoffrey Boycott is a complicated character, loved by some and loathed by others. Jon’s talk was fascinating. The question and answer session also very interesting.

Jon seemed amazed at how many people wanted to buy a copy of the book on the evening; I ended up procuring the very last book from that pile. Almost running out of books is not quite as bad as my act of omission at my first book signing, coincidentally in Yorkshire…

My First Ever Book Signing, Clean Business Cuisine (the book), Actors’ Workshop Halifax (the venue), Yet Something Was Missing, 5 July 2000

I thought about asking Jon to write a glib remark about “a stick of rhubarb” or “uncovered pitches”, but in the end decided against.

The long and short of it is – Janie and I had a very enjoyable evening. I am now looking forward to dipping into the book, Being Geoffrey Boycott.

Plenty Of Real Tennis, Including The MCC Club Weekend & “Batting For The Other Side” In The Queen’s Club v Dedanist’s Society Match, Late January & Early February 2023

Brian Sharp presents the Mason Sharp Trophy To The A/B Category Winners at the end of the MCC weekend.

I played plenty of real tennis (and lawn come to that) in January, building up to the MCC Club Weekend, the last weekend of January, an event that I had either steered away from or had cruelly steered away from me until this year. I’m hooked on the idea of playing in it now, though – it was great fun.

Almost everything I want to say about the weekend, including some video links and photos, is in the match report I wrote about the weekend, which you can find by clicking here.

MCC Tennis Chair, Guy Pemberton, applauds, as Graeme Marks presents

The Queen’s Club v The Dedanist’s Society At Queen’s, 3 February 2023

I have previously described the oddities of Dedanist’s Society matches, with many players being eligible for both teams and often not knowing who they are going to play for until the last minute.

I have previous at this – here’s a report on one in which I represented the MCC against the Dedanist’s, with Carl Snitcher, doyen of The Dedanist’s partnering me for the MCC.

MCC v The Dedanists’ Society, Lord’s, 10 February 2018

…or this one from just before the pandemic, in which I had both an MCC and my Dedanist’s shirt in my bag, as I really had no idea which team I’d end up representing. Carl Snitcher, who was the captain of The Dedanist’s team, ended up playing for the MCC:

Four Courts In 25 Hours; Boston Manor Centre Court, Lord’s Real Tennis Court, Royal Court Theatre & Boston Manor Court One, 8 & 9 February 2020

But I broke yet more new ground in February 2023 in my role in the Queen’s Club match, “batting for the other side”, because I have, in theory, no right whatsoever to represent Queen’s.

Admittedly, I did do some advisory work for Queen’s in the early 1990s, enabling me to enact a fiendish piece of Gamesmanship at that club in the late 1999s…

Lawn Tennis At Queen’s, In Which I Inadvertently Deployed Gamesmanship Masterfully, Yet Still Lost, 24 June 1999

…but I am not a member of Queen’s and not in truth eligible to represent. Further, there were several people listed who were members of both Queen’s and The Dedanist’s. But the timings and handicaps meant that it made sense for me (and one or two other people) to swap sides for this friendliest of friendly fixtures.

I partnered a really pleasant fellow in the first fixture of the day and we did well. I think we set the ball rolling for a Queen’s Club win, but it was hard to tell as we all kept having to look at the schedule to work out which pair was playing for which team.

I think it is fair to say that it REALLY didn’t matter. Nick Browne organised a really enjoyable afternoon and evening – the event was rounded off with a fine meal in the President’s Room – which, as usual, raised money for the Dedanist’s Society’s good causes as well as providing a really good time for us players/attendees.

Reality Meets NewsRevue At Lord’s, 2 to 10 November 2022

Chris Rowe & Ian Harris At Lord’s, Photo by Nat Cherry

A plethora of real tennis at Lord’s in early November:

  • skills night, which I now “match manage”;
  • a match between the MCC and Middlesex University Real Tennis Club (MURTC), which I somehow found myself captaining/match managing for the MCC;
  • a long-in-the-planning “friendly” with fellow NewsRevue alum Chris Rowe.

Skills Night, 2 November 2022

I explained how I “inherited” responsibility for skills night from Johnny Whiting in my review of last year’s event, click here or below:

Back To Life, Back To Reality… Almost, November 2021

This year’s event was no less exceptional, with fun and fabulous prizes on offer, ranging from a half-exploded can of Irn Brew (don’t ask) to a most valuable player award of $500,000,000. The winners got proper bottles of Pol Roger (other fizzy drinks are available) and chocolates. The wooden spoon has now been emblazoned in the form of the coveted Hinds Trophy.

MCC Members can read all about skills night and tennis generally here. Should anything ever go awry with that link, a scrape of my match report can be found here.

MCC v MURTC, 9 November 2022

Those who know me well from school etc. know that I am unaccustomed to being a sports team captain. I was more likely to be the chap waving his hand wildly at the captain saying, “me, me, me” in the hope of being spotted and picked. But Carl Snitcher, the MCC captain for this match, needed to be elsewhere and I got the call about 10 days before the match to step in and “lead”.

Leadership in this instance merely comprised turning up, badgering people into paying their match fees and shouting “come on MCC” at regular intervals during the match.

It was also still my role to play in the fourth rubber of this five rubber match, renewing my partnership with John Thirlwell, whom I hadn’t partnered since before the pandemic.

Thirlwell and Harris snapped in the dedans on a previous match evening

John and I tried to get back into practice together by playing singles against each other the week before (a superb, close bout) and a practice doubles as a pair the day before the MURTC fixture. But all that was to no avail in the matter of winning our rubber on the big night. Still, we made a close match of it and the fixture as a whole was won by the MCC, albeit by the narrowest of margins in the final rubber, to take the match 3-2.

Those interested enough can watch the entire match – all six hours of it – on the MCC Real Tennis YouTube channel through the link below. Compelling is not the word for this viewing.

As Walt Whitman put it, no doubt thinking of match managing a real tennis match, not Abe Lincoln or anything of that sort:

O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won…

NewsRevue Inspired Comedy Singles: Chris Rowe v Ian Harris, 9 November 2022

Soon after taking up real tennis in 2016, I ran into Chris Stanton in the dedans gallery at Lord’s. I had known Chris from NewsRevue since 1992, when I started writing for that show and John Random chose one of my pieces for Chris Stanton to perform, making “Stanny” the first professional actor to perform my material on stage. That, together with the connection with fellow NewsRevue alum Chris Rowe, is explained in my Chris Stanton obituary piece click here or below:

Chris Stanton: Absurdist & Realist, A Personal Tribute, 9 March 2020

Chris Rowe was a good friend of Stanny’s but a little before my time in NewsRevue…

Stanny & Rowy, 1991 NewsRevue Edinburgh Run

…as I understand it, Chris Rowe introduced Chris Stanton to real tennis at Lord’s, although they had rarely played together in recent years; indeed Chris Rowe had/has played hardly at all for several years.

When Chris Rowe and I communicated and eventually met after Stanny’s sad demise, we resolved that we really should have a game of tennis together.

Eventually that idea came to fruition this very day. It was to be Chris Rowe’s first proper game of singles for some considerable time, although he made sure to have a hit with one of the pros by way of preparation.

Despite Chris’s handicap on paper being far better than mine, the pros thought that, taking dormancy into account, we should play level and see what happens.

It was actually a very good match playing level, with deuces galore and lots of good rests (which is real tennis speak for rallies).

Unfortunately, the CCTV cameras wee not recording our match for posterity, so I cannot show you any clips from the actual singles bout in question, but I can assure you that the level was much higher than my doubles level the day before…

…but I would say that, wouldn’t I?

In the absence of footage from the actual match, I thought the following highlights reel is as close as I can get to illustrating the sort of skills on show that day. Below is a six minute thrillathon, which you might prefer to the six hour marathon of the MCC v MURTC match above:

Actually, there were probably elements of the Rowe v Harris match that might be seen as comedy tennis, in particular when one of us (usually me) got caught in an “it’s behind you” position, unable to call my own chase.

We also both managed an array of “characters” correcting the chase calls and devising arcane etiquette on the fly…

…since you last played here, my good fellow, the MCC Committee has deemed it to be ungentlemanly conduct to make a chap run around the court like that and then take the point from him…

…that sort of thing.

But then, as I said when I first met Chris Stanton at Lord’s:

If John Random were to consider inventing an ancient game with bizarre, arcane rules, for comedy purposes, he need look no further than the actual laws of real tennis.

Joking apart, it was such a pleasure finally to play tennis with Chris Rowe having plotted to do so for so long. I hope we’ll do it again. Although, if he gets back into practice, Chris will need to be giving me quite a few handicap points for sure.

Four Courts In 25 Hours; Boston Manor Centre Court, Lord’s Real Tennis Court, Royal Court Theatre & Boston Manor Court One, 8 & 9 February 2020

Saturday 8 Feburary, Janie and I went to Boston Manor for an early game of lawn tennis. It was a bit chilly but the sun was shining and the weather was set dreadful for the next couple of days.

So although I was due on court for a real tennis match that afternoon, we both needed some exercise and both fancied some of the outdoor variety.

We had a good game. I thought I played well and hoped my timing would be as good that afternoon as it had been that morning. In the end I think it was.

A quick scrub up and then off to Lord’s in Dumbo for the MCC v Dedanists match.

Parking Up Dumbo…Outside Moreton Morrell in this photo as it happens

The MCC v Dedanists match has been reported extensively on the Dedanists Society and MCC websites. Your truly has written the report. Here is a link to the Dedanists’ Society site.

Here is a link to a scrape of the report on The Dedanists’ site, which might be easier for you once my report is no longer headline news.

Here are some pictures. First up, the Captains:

Carl Snitcher in “thinker” pose
Sam Leigh keeping an eye on the guests, no doubt

Below are some of the spectators, rapt with attention, hanging on every shot:

Here’s me, John Thirlwell and my partner Martin Village (grabbing a coffee) as we came off court.

Here’s a link to all the stills that Janie took that day:

Janie took a few video clips, the first of which illustrates the famous Harris serve followed by the infamous Harris grunt…

…this next one shows some relatively classy play by our standards…

…and this next one includes my incisive calling, an all-time favourite string, “switch…up yours…well played”:

For the uninitiated, the phrase “up yours” is not a petulant expletive in the direction of one’s partner. Heaven forbid. “Up” indicates that the ball will land on the penthouse above the dedans gallery, thus telling one’s partner that there is no need to volley. “Yours” means that the ball, once it descends, is for one’s partner to play.

Considering that Martin and I had never even seen each other play before, let alone played together, I thought we got a lot more of that sort of stuff right than might have been expected.

I have scraped CCTV video evidence of the match highlights from all five of the rubbers, which can be seen in silence but glorious colour, through the following embedded links. We join Tony Friend & Paul Cattermull v Yuri Kugler & Julian Sheraton Davis in the second set with the score at 4-4:

We join Sam Leigh & Simon Martin v Simon Webster & Rodger Davis in the second set with the score at 3-3.

We join Giles Stogdon & Carl Snitcher v James McDermott & David Enticknap in the second set with the score at 2-3.

We join Peter Dean & Giles Pemberton v Johnny Saunders & Linda Sheraton Davis towards the end of the first set with the score at 4-4.

If you are a truly in search of passing some time (nearly an hour), you can watch both sets of the Sebastian Wood & John Thirlwell v Ian Harris & Martin Village match below.

As if that wasn’t enough drama for one day, Janie and I went on to the Royal Court to see All Of It after Lord’s. It was a wonderful 45 minutes of theatre, reported on here and below:

All Of It by Alistair McDowall, Royal Court Theatre, 8 February 2020

On Sunday morning the wind was howling at 40 mph plus and the weather forecast looked increasingly terrible. But the rain didn’t start first thing and Accuweather suggested that it wouldn’t rain until 11:00, so we decided to brave our regular 10:00 slot.

Just a little bit crazy – picture from some daftness a few years ago

Strangely, there was no-one else around in the park, apart from Linda Massey who was battening down the hatches of the pavilion.

Linda briefly came across to the tennis courts to tell us:

Ok, I am now officially declaring that you two are mad.

Strangely, once we got used to the wind, we had an exhilarating, fun although not exactly classic, game of lawners.

We played on Court One on Sunday, whereas we had played on Court Two (Centre Court) on Saturday. So those two, plus the Lord’s real tennis court and the Royal Court theatre add up to four courts in 25 hours.

Don’t tell Linda Massey, but we went back to Boston Manor Park again on Monday morning in similar weather – again no-one else around – and had another game of lawners. We’re not mad…we’re just a bit mad on tennis.

Tennis

A Real Nailbiter Of A Finish, MCC v MURTC, Lord’s, 13 November 2019

It’s not very often I play in a match that is determined by the very last point or the very last ball, especially in my favourite sports, tennis & cricket. Professional matches occasionally conjure up such a nailbiter – this year seems to have been a bit of a year for it…

The Day England Won The Cricket World Cup, England v New Zealand, 14 July 2019

…and I did once, in 2005, play in a hugely exciting, tied charity cricket match that lives long in my memory:

Far And Away The Most Exciting Game Of Cricket I Have Ever Played, Tufty Stackpole v The Children’s Society, North Crawley, 31 July 2005

…but I digress.

On arrrival at Lord’s for the 2019 MCC v MURTC fixture, I encountered Jonathan Ellis-Miller, one of the MCC regulars for this fixture, looking uncharcteristically glum. He was bemoaning the fact that MURTC had conjured up some big South African ringers for this match. I know all about this type of team selection, having been on the right and the wrong side of such shenanigans in charity cricket matches many times. Indeed the 2005 Tufty Stackpole fixture linked above had a Saffer ringer element and the 2006 rematch even more so – rare examples of the big Saffers being on my side for a change.

Tufty Stackpole v The Children’s Society, North Crawley CC, “Match Report”, 30 July 2006

I’m digressing again.

In truth, Carl Snitcher and Catherine Hudson can only be described as Big Saffers by dint of their indisputably big personailities and their unfeasibly big tennis rackets. We’re not talking “85 mph bowling” or “move your car out of the boundary-side car park, possibly into the next village” type big Saffers.

Anyway, point is, Jonathan Ellis-Miller was probably suspecting that he would struggle to repeat his 2018 heroics when up against the combined forces of Carl Snitcher and Catherine Hudson, despite the nominally numerical advantages of his double, double-barrelled pairing with David Mitchell-Innes.

In 2018 it was Jonathan, combined with Jeremy Norman, who snatched victory from the very jaws of defeat in the fourth rubber – I think they were a set and 5-1 or 5-2 down, to level the fixture. That allowed me and Nick Evans to seal the unlikely deal with a 5th rubber win to take the match 3-2.

This year, Nick Evans was involved in the first rather than the last rubber of the fixture, partnering Richard Boys-Stones. These two were on court doing battle with Messrs Rivlin and Humphris when I arrived and had that gloomy conversation with Jonathan Ellis-Miller.

This time I have scraped the highlights (i.e. the endings) of the matches from the MCC CCTV feed. Here’s the last ten minutes of that first rubber:

Thus the MCC led 1-0 after the first rubber.

Jonathan Ellis-Miller’s sense of foreboding for the second rubber was not unwarranted, although the handicap system did its job in making for a very close contest, despite the large handicap.

While that contest was playing out, Peter Luck-Hille, who had kindly turned up to observe, remarked that he came along to watch to get away from all the politics. Then I thought Peter also suggested forming a Dedanists’ Party, which I think would be an excellent idea. I suggested the strap line:

The Dedanists’ Party – Where Politics Gets Real…

…which can be reduced to a micro-slogan: “Get Real”…

…but then learnt that Peter had actually suggested forming a Hedonists’ Party, not a Dedanists’ Party. Frankly, if Socialism doesn’t work because it takes up too many evenings, I cannot see how Hedonism as a political force might work; too many evenings, too many late nights, too many lazy days…get real.

Returning to the reality of the match, in my humble opinion, Carl and Catherine both played really well together that day and deserved their win in the circumstances. You’ll see Jonathan try to repeat the antics of 2018 with a late charge from the rear (as it were), only to fall agonisingly short in the end. I have started the video a few moments after some unrepeatable language – from whence it came who knows? – about 15 minutes from the conclusion of this rubber:

1-1 on the rubber count, at which point Dominic Flint and I took to the court to face Sharon Maidment and Sebastian Wood.

Sebastian, like Carl, is a member of both clubs and has previously represented the MCC in this fixture. This is very much the way in real tennis, although Janie tells me that I should describe these fellows, in no-nonsense terms, as traitors.

But then Janie’s judgment might not be ideal for this matter. I asked her where I should start the highlights cut on this rubber, to which she said:

I’m not sure I’d describe any of it as highlights…

…then, when Janie observed my crest-fallen facial expression, she said…

…what I meant was, all of that rubber is a highlight.

Now that makes sense. So here, split into two halves, is the entire 57 minute episode that was Rubber 3. Below the first reel…

…but I’d recommend the second reel for all but the completists amongst you, as it starts at 5-5 30-30 towards the end of the first set:

So, MCC led 2-1 as we went into the fourth rubber. That was a more one-sided affair as Sam Asgedom and John Harrington took full advantage of the handicap bestowed upon them by Paul Cattermull and Nick Davidson. Without detracting in any way from the performances of others, young Sam demonstrated how quickly young players can develop their skills beyond the progression of their handicaps – an impressive display. Here is the last few minutes of that rubber:

The calculating amongst the readership (if anyone remains this far down the page) will have gathered that the match was poised at 2-2 with one to play, as indeed it had been poised last year. But whereas last year’s deciding rubber proved to be a rather one-sided affair, with me and Nick Evans both conjuring our very best tennis, together, at the same time, for just enough time to get two sets done in a hurry…

…this year the 5th and deciding rubber proved to be an absolute cracker.

By this stage of the evening, the delicious soup, curry, cheese and the rather scrummy Malbec wine had all been taken away or had gone, but the stalwarts who remained to cheer on their heroes somehow managed to fortify themselves with a plentiful supply of Pinot Grigio which remained. Or, in my case, ahead of an early start the next day, water.

Steven Bishop and Rodger Davis, two vastly experienced gentlemen of the MCC, took on Stuart Kerr and David Offen, MURTC regulars who became regulars far more recently than the MCC regulars. The MCC won a tight first set 6-4. We join the match towrds the end of the second set, which, at this stage, MURTC seemed to be leading reasonably comfortably:

At the end of the second set, Mark Ryan, who marked the match with his usual expertise and impartiality, let anyone who was listening (i.e. those without sound-proofed boxes over their heads) that he thought the MCC should have finished the match off when they had the match point to do so. I think Mark wanted to go home and frankly, as he was the one who was working past 22:00 in the evening, who could blame him for expressing his disapointment.

But sport is sport and we were in for a humbinger of a deciding set, which starts at 3-3. For the non-artithmetical amongst the readership, that makes it a “best of five games” set rather than the regular “best of 11 games” set. For the ultra-observant of the video clip below, Mark, in his fury, had recorded the second set score on his gadget as 6-5 MCC rather than 6-5 MURTC. But everyone knew what the score really was.

As this was a handicap match, a set can go to 5-5 40-40 and be determioned by a single point, which is exactly what happened here. Further, that “one point” that determined the match became a chase, just to add to the excitement. It really was very exciting to watch.

Here’s the whole set:

It was a really splendid evening. Good company, good sport and an exciting ending to boot. MURTC might be disappointed to come away from such a match without a win, but, if you’ll forgive the cliche, tennis is the real winner when matches are as close, convivial and enjoyable as this one.

I seem to have become a regular component of fixtures between the MCC and Middlesex University Real Tennis Club (MURTC), several of which I have written up (click here for my MURTC tag). Strangely, I did not write up the November 2018 version of this fixture at the time, but I hope I have covered the 2018 match as best I can within this write up.

Anyway, I hope I am selected again – I always really enjoy these matches. There’s also something of the local derby about MCC v MURTC too which adds a certain frisson to the excellent company and good sporting combat…especially/even when the match goes tantalisingly down to the very last point.

Tennis At Queen’s Followed By A Bit Of London Cricket Trust Charity Media At Lord’s, 18 July 2019

Those of us who play real tennis at Lord’s are still in exile due to the cricket world cup, despite the fact that the tournament ended on Sunday. I have spent much of my exile at The Queen’s Club (well posh exile) and had arranged another two hour session of doubles, following the five set epic a few weeks ago.

Sort of three hours of doubles for me, as Neil at Queen’s asked me at the last minute to help make up a doubles the evening before, so I was still a little sore from trying to keep up with Bomber, The Saint and The Biscuit (all well above my handicap/pay grade).

For our two hour session, Dominic and Bill (as last time), but this time we were joined by Snitch for the first hour. After Snitch left, we played a real tennis form of Canadian Doubles, with the server/receiver from the doubles pair grabbing the “honour” of doing the hard work as the single player until defeated.

I worked up quite a sweat, especially as the single towards the end. Then picked up the message from Fletch at Middlesex CCC that Kevin Hand wanted to interview me this evening about the London Cricket Trust and AB de Villiers, for BBC Radio London and BBC Essex, so we arranged that between the sweats and the showers.

Soon after I set off in Dumbo for home, I felt a touch of cramp starting in my foot and tried to wriggle my foot while braking for the lights…but instead slipped my foot onto the accelerator, requiring me to switch to emergency stop braking which made one hell of a screech.

Better than half-a-yard…or more or less the nick. Phew.

I signalled an apology to the driver in front, who seemed to be apoplectic with rage, leaping about in his seat and waving his arms. Then I realised that he was car-seat-jiving while listening to loud music. Perhaps he hadn’t even noticed my near miss.

When the lights changed, the jiver/driver in front zoomed off ahead of me, as fast as I have ever seen someone zoom out of Palliser Road. Whether he was just that sort of driver or desperate to get away from me I’ll never know.

Then some work in the sweatshop that is my little office at home on a sunny afternoon.

So I had another shower before heading to Lord’s – not for the start of the match but in good time for my “over 18 of the first innings” appointment with Fletch.

As I got out of the shower, the phone was ringing. Fletch.

Can we meet a little earlier than I said – like over 15?…

…sure, I’m just getting ready to leave…

I’m sorry, it’s because I have other media to do on the pavilion side in the interval after dropping you off…Eoin Morgan…

…should be no problem, Fletch, but I need to get off the phone so I can put on some clothes and leave. I know its radio, but I figure I’ll still need to put on some clothes to get through the street, the gates and to the media centre?…

…yes, I think that would be for the best.

In fact I was making good time and got to the Maida Vale/St John’s Wood borders, where I knew I could park easily, bang on 18:30. So I was in the ground and able to watch cricket for about half-an-hour before wending my way round to the media centre, where I enjoyed the commentator’s view of the last few overs and could hear the radio commentary of course…in the commentary box.

Below is my interview, which runs for about eight minutes if you want to hear it all.

Radio London Radio Essex Interview LCT 18 July 2019

Here is a link to the moment during my interview when Eoin Morgan waved at us in the Media Centre commentary box, tweeted by Kevin Hand.

In the commentary box was the artefact pictured below. It seems that the media centre tea-time spread was adorned by this artefact for each of the world cup matches at Lord’s, with the badges of that day’s competing nations shown on the helmets. Left over from the world cup final on Sunday:

Kevin Hand was apologetic about the shortness of the interview and the fact that he sort-of had to leave me to it while he photographed and tweeted about Eoin Morgan. But Kevin owed me no apology for that; it was great and timely publicity for the London Cricket Trust charity.

In any case, it seems Kevin might want me to do the odd additional slot with him this season. If for no other reason, I think he’s keen to disambiguate Ian Harris and Ged for any listeners who might, understandably, be bemused and/or amused.

Kevin also apologised to me when he discovered that I came in especially for the interview as I hadn’t planned to attend the match. Again no apology needed as I live so close by and in fact I am so glad I was there for the post world cup afterglow. The Middlesex v Essex match was even played on the world cup pitch.

In fact I stayed for just the first few overs of the Middlesex innings before heading home and catching the end of the match on the broadcast.

One final anecdote. When I mentioned during my interview that AB de Villiers had come out to Deptford for us just a few hours after landing from South Africa, Kevin wondered whether we might have tired him out ahead of his first appearance for Middlesex. I think the scorecard and match reports attest that Kevin needn’t have worried.