Tag: Renée Harris

Family Seasonal Stuff, 13, 21, 25 and 31 December 2008

13 December 2008 Hil & Chris

This will have been a Christmas presents visit with Janie cooking dinner for all of us. The details of the menu are not recorded in Janie’s diary, but we do know that Janie & I took a cab after dinner and stayed at my flat, letting Hil and Chris have Sandall Close for the night while we went back to Sandall Close via the tennis court in the morning.

21 December 2008 Charlie

Charlie visited her grandma and then came over to Sandall Close for dinner and to stay the night. The menu is not recorded again, but the words “Champagne in fridge” do appear in Janie’s diary. Priorities.

25 December 2008 Christmas Lunch In Battersea

With Dad and Len now gone, we felt that the gathering at Janie’s place would no longer be appropriate. We ended up booking a restaurant in Battersea – I cannot remember its name or how we came across it, but it seemed keenly priced for Christmas Day and suitably located twixt North-West and South-West London.

I recall our Addison Lee driver really struggling to find Battersea High Street and getting very stressy with us. I recall the place being pretty darned good for the price, in terms of food, drink and ambience. I’m pretty sure it was just me, Janie, Hils, Jacquie and Mum that year. Janie thinks Michael and Dorothy joined us, but I think their first appearance for a Christmas Day do was the following year.

I think mum picked up the tab for all five of us – hence me not having a record of the name of the place.

31 December 2008 – New Years Eve Gathering At The Ramada

Phillie really hadn’t been at all well that autumn and there was real doubt as to whether she should or would attend this event. But we had arranged it with her in mind – she wanted to dance – so we took a large table at a communal New Years Eve dinner and dance at the Ramada Ealing (the DoubleTree by Hilton at the time of writing, January 2019).

Wouldn’t have been our choice independently but, hey, it was what Phillie wanted and everyone at that time thought this might be her last hoorah. In the end, Phillie needed to have herself put together with sellotape and promise the doctor that she wouldn’t not to dance too much to get permission to attend.

We think the attendees were Max, Micky, Kim, Anthea, Mitchell, Hil, Chris, Tony, Phillie, Charlie (I think), Janie and me.

Phillie, in her inimitable style, complied with “doctors orders” by dancing all the rest of us off the dance floor – I’m talking non stop dancing for hours. Kim and Janie’s thoughts on the matter are captured photographically below:

Contrasting Care And Attention To Lower Limbs: An Afternoon & Evening With Mum At Woodfield Avenue And Newton’s, 1 February 2008

Janie is a very good-hearted sort, as evidenced by her diary entries for this afternoon – listing a whole load of stuff to take over to my mum’s house that afternoon for our “half-holiday” and evening with mum. A busman’s half-holiday in Janie’s case, with chiropody equipment and massage oils listed.

In short, Janie will have given a great deal of care and attention to mum’s feet and shanks when we visited her at Woodfield Avenue that afternoon, ahead of dinner at Newton’s in Clapham.

Newton’s had been recommended by John and Lily Hogan, who were keen on that place. To be fair, it had good reviews back then and writing more than 10 years later (January 2019), although renamed 33 Abbeville now, still seems to be well regarded by the locals.

We were also attracted to the place by the offering of slow-cooked lamb shanks; a dish we all like(d) and don’t often see on modern restaurant menus.

Unfortunately, the care and attention that Janie gave to my mother’s feet and shanks did not appear to be replicated in those served to us at Newton’s. Our guess is that the shanks we were served had not been cooked for anything like long enough, making the central purpose of our visit more than a little disappointing.

At that stage of her life, mum found it difficult to keep her disappointment to herself…

…and at that stage of long, hard-working weeks, Janie and I were not in the very best of moods for awkwardness either, so I don’t think the visit ended quite as well as it should have done.

We did not return to Newton’s to ascertain whether our poor meal there was a one-off problem – quite possibly it was but we were none of us “second chance” types for restaurants – especially mum.

This picture actually four year’s later at Noddyland, taken by Kim or Janie

Some Early December Dinners: 1, 7 & 8 December 2007

It was that time of year I guess.

Saturday 1 December we had the Jams over for dinner at Sandall Close. Kim, Micky & DJ came. No doubt it was a good one.

Friday 7 December we went to Michael and Pam’s for dinner. Mum joined us there. I suppose they were sensitive to the season and the fact that dad had passed away a few months earlier. It was kind of them to do that; I don’t suppose it was much of a fun evening for any of us in the circumstances.

Saturday 8 December we went to Claudia & Richard’s house in Totteridge for dinner. Anthea and Mitchell were there. The hospitality was lavish and the company very enjoyable that evening. It looks as though we got a cab because Janie’s diary is replete with cab booking notes.

Dinner With Mum, Dad and Janie at Lamberts, Balham, 29 June 2007

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A painful memory, this one. Not for the dinner itself, which was a culinary and social success, celebrating Janie’s birthday.

Painful, because we now know that dad only had a few weeks to live. There were just a couple of clues on the  night.

Dad was just shy of 88 and was finding it harder to get in and out of the car without help, but on this occasion he needed a lot of help; far more than he had needed before.

The other clue was that dad didn’t finish his meal. He said the food was very good but that he didn’t have the appetite for any more than he had eaten. This was a very unusual thing for dad to do/say, but we thought little of it at the time.

In fact, dad was riddled with cancer by then. In early August, when he collapsed and we were given the news that he was in such a bad way, the specialist couldn’t believe that he had been more-or-less symptom free until five weeks before he collapsed.

There are a few other photos from the evening including the one above – click here if you want to see them. 

Dad’s Last Birthday, A Day At Lord’s, 11 August 2006

Today (11 August 2019) I wrote a tribute piece about my dad, on the 100th anniversary of his birth – click here or below:

My Dad, Peter Harris At 100: Born 11 August 1919, Died 6 August 2007, Remembered 11 August 2019

I was reminiscing about his last birthday, 2006. I took mum and dad to Lord’s for a birthday treat. Dad had no interest whatsoever in sport, but he did enjoy a nice meal and my parents had never before seen Lord’s.

It was good fortune that the Middlesex v Hampshire match went to a fourth day – indeed it eventually went the distance on that fourth day. I did have a Plan B, in case you are wondering, but Plan B was not needed.

As I reminisced just now, the piece seemed to be writing itself in my brain, almost as if I had already written it.

Then I realised that I HAD already written it; I wrote a pretty comprehensive account of that lovely day for the Middlesex Till We Die (MTWD) website at the time – click here for that piece.

If by chance anything ever goes awry with that site, click here for a scrape of said piece.

Just in case there’s anyone left on the planet who is bemused by the pseudonyms, I am Ged Ladd so my parents are “Mr & Mrs Ladd Senior”.

On re-reading that piece, I have little else to add about the day.

Here is a link to the scorecard for the match – interesting to see so many people who are now involved with England cricket and cricket at Lord’s (not only but including Middlesex) participating in that match. What a good match it was too.

One final reflection. I remember asking dad afterwards if he had enjoyed the day. His reply:

It was absolutely lovely. Thank you so much.

As much as anything else, it was nice to be with so many people of my own age somewhere other than the old age home.

I’m not sure that the Middlesex/MCC marketing people will be wanting to reuse that quote, but if they want it they can have it.

The Day That Dad Turned Eighty And We Threw A Party For Him After Celestial Bodies, Like, Totally Eclipsed His Special Day, 11 August 1999

Dad partying like it’s 1999…because it WAS 1999

It was Dad’s eightieth birthday. I asked him what he wanted. He said he wanted a party.

Mum said he didn’t want a party.

MUM: You don’t want a party, Peter. What would you want a party for?

DAD: It’s my eightieth birthday. Ian’s asked me what I want. I want a party. I haven’t had a party before. I’ll probably never have a party again.

ME: You want a party? You shall have a party.

Janie and I organised a party. Our household records indicate that we ordered wine to be delivered from Oddbins and pies to be delivered and served by The Pie Man – much as we had done for “The Duchess of Castlebar” (Pauline’s) 70th a few weeks earlier:

Dinner With The Family: A 70th Birthday Do For The Duchess, 3 July 1999

My diary reminds me that I went to a lunchtime party at Theodore Goddard’s offices (at the invitation of Graham Stedman) to witness the total solar eclipse, which the celestial bodies had obviously arranged to honour my father’s 80th birthday.

I think I made my way to Woodfield Avenue by public transport from that party, while Janie brought the car having spent the earlier part of the day working. I’ll rephrase that: I spent the earlier part of the day working by dint of being “looked after” by our company lawyers, while Janie had a more regular working morning in the company of several pairs of feet.

In those days, Janie obviously still thought of crossing the river to visit my parents as a major expedition beyond her normal boundaries. Her appointment diary entry reads:

3.00 pm – leave London for Peter’s party.

…in Streatham, which, apparently, is not in London. Anyway…

…the party went swimmingly well.

I’m struggling to remember who was there and we only have a handful of photos from that party, which were in “Mum’s Photo Box”, identifying only a few of the guests.

Pam and Michael Harris were there, as evidenced pictorially. The neighbours were there, in the form of Eardley and Adrienne Dadonka, plus John & Lily Hogan. Peter Harris (no relation) from next door confirms that he was away, unfortunately. Norman and Marjorie Levinson were there, the pictures prove. I remember Lionel and Dina Aarons being there. I’m sure that Stanley and Doreen Benjamin would have been there if around, as would Malcolm and Delia Cedar, John & Angela Kessler (my cousin, Dad’s niece), Len and Jacquie Briegal (cousins and close friends from Mum’s side), plus Leatrice Levene (Arnold had recently died back then). But I have a feeling quite a lot of “the usual suspects” were away.

I think there were about 20 people there all in all. The size of the crowd didn’t matter – Dad was no Trump (a little August 2024 topical joke there, as I write 25 years after Dad’s event). Dad had a great time as evidenced by the couple of photos I have inherited. I wonder who took them? They are the only pictures I have of the Woodfield Avenue living room from that angle, pretty much as it looked for most of mum’s life and nearly half of Dad’s.

I’m so glad that we did throw the party Dad wanted on that auspicious day. Dad wasn’t really a party person, but most of the time he did know how to have fun.

I know who took this picture of Dad: Me. August Bank Holiday Weekend, 1977.

A Wild Time In Late December 1998: Three Events

Photo by Richard Bartz, Munich Makro Freak, CC BY-SA 2.5

Michael Mainelli’s Birthday Party Aboard Lady Daphne In St Katherine’s Dock, 19 December 1998

Fret not, we were below for this party

Quite a big do. This was Michael’s 40th. Live music if I remember correctly. All the usual suspects were there. And us.

In those days you didn’t take a gazillion pictures at parties. Perhaps someone did take pictures, but I don’t recall seeing any from this party. If Michael and Elisabeth have some and want to provide digital versions thereof, I’ll gladly put a few of them into this article.

We ate, we drank, we danced, we made merry. it was a party.

Christmas Lunch At My Parent’s Place, 25 December 1998

There’s little in the diary about this, other than a tell-tale note that the taxi would cost £32, which was almost certainly an Ealing to Streatham price in those days.

I suspect that Jacqueline, Len and Hils were there that year. I also suspect that this was one of the last times, if not the last time, that my mum did Christmas day at Woodfield Avenue.

It will have been turkey for main, I’m pretty sure.

A Wild Boar Dinner At Sandall Close, Sunday 27 December 1998

The tell-tale note in Janie’s diary is an order for a rack of wild boar from Harvey Nicholls “for next Sunday”. This was one of Janie’s specialities at that time and boy was it good. We have never since found a source of excellent wild boar rack since Harvey Nicks stopped doing it.

The cast for that evening (again made clear from Janie’s diary) was Kim & Micky, Anthea [Simms] & Mitchell [Sams], plus Rupert [Stubbs] & Ana. Janie rather impressively remembered that Ana was Ana Limbrick, who (as well as dating Rupert at that time) was, indeed still is, a physiotherapist to whom Janie occasionally refers clients.

It will have been a jolly evening, despite the fact that several of the guests no doubt said “what a boar” when praising the meal.

Lunch With My Parents, Royal Garden Hotel Kensington, 18 July 1993

As if a rather disastrous night out to see (half of) Hedda Gabler wasn’t enough for one weekend…

Hedda Gabler by Henrik Ibsen, Holland Park, 17 July 1993

…we were at mine that weekend and were joined at lunchtime by my parents. I’m pretty sure this was the first time Janie met them.

My vague recollection is that this particular gathering went fine and that it was the next time around that mum was rude to Janie and then phoned to apologise as soon as she got home…

…but maybe it was this occasion. Janie is sure the rude incident occurred at my place, but then we might have gathered at my place before or after The Royal Garden.

Sunday lunch at The Royal Garden was a good choice for my folks. It was always a buffet, each week on a different theme. Janie and I eschew such things now, but in those days lots of our friends liked them and for big/fussy eaters such as dad and mum (respectively), such buffets were a good idea. Dad could always indulge himself and mum could always find at least something she liked.

Mum and Dad 15 years earlier – they were in colour by 1993

The Last Week Of December 1988

A person with a watch knows the time. A person with two watches can never sure what the time is.

But the “two diaries” bit seems to work out OK in this instance, with the old diary showing my Christmas activities and the new one showing that I started my “work during Twixtmas” tradition long ago.

25 December 1988: Ma Pa and G Jenny for tea, Benjamins for dinner. Stayed Ma and Pas.

Thinking about the logistics of all this – I think mum and dad must have picked up Grandma Jenny in Surbiton, brought her to my flat for tea (possibly the first time they saw Clanricarde Gardens and in Grandma Jenny’s case quite possibly the only time). At Doreen and Stanley Benjamin’s in Putney we were possibly joined by Jane and Lisa and one or both of their respective beau’s/future husbands if they were around at that time. Also Doreen’s mum, Jessie Jackson, would have been there if she was still with us in 1988.

26 December 1988: Lunch at Ma and Pas returned home early evening

No record in either diary of what I did on the bank holiday Tuesday nor the Wednesday. Perhaps I was so knackered by the activities of the preceding few weeks that i simply took the opportunity to work soft and play soft.

The diary marking SCF for 29 and 30 December shows that I went to Save The Children Fund in Camberwell those two days.

Ten Days Spent, Primarily, Eating And Drinking, 15 to 24 December 1988

If you simply go by my diary notes, I spent the ten days in the run up to Christmas eating and drinking that year. What’s changed/who knew?

I’m going to be a bit light on details with several of these:

Thursday 15 December: Went over to Bobbies for dinner

I’ll guess that there were other people involved, but the diaries are silent on the matter, beyond the above information

Friday 16 December: Went to Ma and Pa for dinner

One thing I do remember about this visit was me gently but firmly letting mum know that, now that I’d moved to Notting Hill, I wasn’t suddenly going to be making Friday evening visits for family dinner a regular thing.

Saturday 17 December: Driving lesson. Annalisa came over for meal in evening

That was my second driving lesson in Notting Hill (I’d had one the previous Saturday). I think that meal I cooked for Annalisa that evening might well have been the first time I cooked for someone other than myself at Clanricarde Gardens. No idea what I cooked for her. There are some Thai recipes on my jotter but I can see, from the context of the other notes, that those were jotted after Christmas, probably after I discovered Tawana.

Monday 19 December: Driving lesson in evening.

My instructor in Notting Hill Gate was a gentle fellow. I remember his girlfriend (or wife) was an orchestra musician from East Germany and he spent much of our chatting time railing against the Honecker regime, little knowing how close we were to its demise.

Tuesday 20 December: Bobbie came over for meal in evening

This might well have been the first time I cooked for Bobbie at Clanricarde. This will have been a meatier affair than cooking for Annalisa and/but probably a simpler meal being an after work job rather than a weekend job.

Wednesday 21 December: Radius lunch in afternoon. BHMC [Binder Hamlyn Management Consultants] & drinks after work

I cannot remember exactly who Radius were, but I am guessing that they were a software supplier. That week, and the week before, I had switched away from Save The Children Fund (who wanted me to return to do most of my assignment in the new year, after their massive Christmas Appeal surge was over), so I joined colleague/mentor Lars Schiphorst at Holland & Holland. My guess is that I was brought in at that place to look at the financial/accounting systems aspects of a project long since forgotten by all involved.

Thinking about Lars, who, despite having to tolerate teaming with me on that assignment and others, went on to be a good friend for several years at Binders before he emigrated to Australia…I wondered if it would be possible to trace Lars 30 years later.

Yes. Thank you, Mr Google.

Here he is at the Australian Institute For Performance Studies in December 2018 – click here…

…or click here, where I have scraped the relevant page at the time, if you get no joy on the AIPS site above.

Lars Schiphorst – ludicrously still recognisable/barely changed all these years later.

Friday 23 December: Pub lunch with BHMC mob – little work after

The thing I remember most about that lunch was chatting with Geoffrey Rutland, RIP, who was especially friendly, welcoming and helpful with advice. He also turned out, strangely, like myself, to have been a former scholarship boy at Alleyn’s – although in his case a few years earlier.

Actually I remember everyone at Binders being friendly and welcoming that December – I felt quite at home in that firm quite rapidly, despite the fact that I knew I had been recruited as canon fodder in a turf war between a handful of partners.