Tim Connell – Ian Louis Harris

Gresham Society Visit To The Royal Tennis Court, Hampton Court, 14 September 2023

The building “set back” with a turret in the above picture is the original Tudor-period covered tennis court at Hampton Court Palace, with several walls remaining, one of which is part of the current, Stuart-period covered court, which is on the site of the original uncovered court.

Thanks to Janie for most of the pictures and all the videos (apart from the professional highlights vid).

Whose idea was it to have a real tennis-themed event at Hampton Court? As the event proved to be a great success, Tim Connell is claiming full responsibility for the idea. Meanwhile, I am claiming at least to have inspired the idea with my lockdown webinar, Tennis Around The Time Of Thomas Gresham, in 2020.

Tennis Around The Time Of Thomas Gresham, Gresham Society Webinar Presentation, 7 October 2020

Full credit to Tim for the timing of the event – he insisted that we try to find a sweet spot between the summer holidays and the weather turning autumnal. A hostage to fortune, perhaps, but the timing worked brilliantly, as we were blessed with a sunny but not too hot afternoon for the event.

The good people at the Royal Tennis Court, Hampton Court (RTCHC) were incredibly helpful in allowing us to hold the event and facilitating same, from the initial conversation I had about it with Lesley Ronaldson the previous autumn right through to the day itself. Thanks to all named below plus Nick Wood, the RTCHC Head Professional, without whose blessing none of this would have been possible.

The History Of The Court & Explaining The Game, David Best, Lesley Ronaldson & Jack Josephs

Lesley very kindly suggested that David Best, who wrote THE book on the history of the Royal Tennis Court, speak to our group on that topic. David even more kindly agreed to speak and also to join in our brief “exhibition” to demonstrate the game.

*Lesley Ronaldson, a Real Tennis Hall of Famer in her own right, assisted David’s history talk…*

*…while Lesley also assisted Jack Joseph’s explanation of the game in all its facets*

RTCHC’s junior professional, Jack Josephs, did most of the game explaining. Two years ago, when I first met Jack at Middlesex University’s court, he was a complete newbie!

*Both Lesley and Jack talked a lot of balls…I mean, talked a lot ABOUT balls*

After hearing about it, Gresham Society members and guests were invited to have a go. Surprisingly, many tried…

Unsurprisingly, few succeeded. It is a fiendishly difficult game, even for moderately talented regular enthusiasts. For neophytes it is even harder than that.

*Basil’s first ever hit of a Real Tennis ball skimmed beautifully over the net. The second did not – Basil claims that it was poorly delivered.*

*Tim & Bobbie; “close but no cigar” in the matter of hitting the ball over the net*

Janie’s technique looks wanting, but she landed chases with each of her goes

Then a short exhibition, during which David Best and I, ably assisted by a professional on each side – thank you Jack & thank you Scott Blaber – demonstrated through a short match how it should and shouldn’t be done. Lesley supplied the commentary, as did the players when at the service end.

Janie shot very little video of the exhibition match…”thank goodness” I hear many readers cry…but here is a short snippet to give you an idea:

If you want to see what the game looks like at the highest level, the following six minute reel of highlights shows the very top professionals at play:

Tea & Cake

Then, for the Gresham Society visitors and their guests it was time for tea and cake. In truth I hadn’t realised, when the RTCHC people said that they would lay on tea and cake, that “Lesley Ronaldson’s home made cake” is what they meant.

Had I known that, I wouldn’t have teased Lesley by e-mail a couple of days before with the words:

No pressure, but my wife, Janie, will be judging the whole event on her piece of cake.

Former US Open Champions / World Championship Finalists are not deterred such entreaties. As we know, champions adjust and pressure is a privilege.

Lesley “pulled off a blinder” in the matter of the home made cakes, to such an extent that Janie was too busy enjoying the tea break to photograph same until most of the sweet delicacies had been well and truly devoured.

The weather was simply glorious at that stage of the afternoon, allowing the visitors to enjoy the wonderful tea and cakes in the garden – hence the barren look of the dining room in the above photo.

The visitors took some marshalling back into the dedans gallery for the final part of the visit, a performance symposium, led by yours truly, on the topic of “Hampton Court, Tennis, Gresham, Music & Drama”.

Click here or below for a link to the full transcript, which actually extends to something like 90-100 minutes if it was all used at the same event – we used about 60 minutes of the material.

Hampton Court, Tennis, Gresham, Music & Drama

The performance was ably supported by Jack Carter and Reuben Ard, tennis-playing music graduate / research students from Middlesex University Real Tennis Club and a couple of guest appearances from Tim and Pilar Connell. Also providing praiseworthy support were the visitors, most of whom sang along with the help of their scripts/song sheets. Click here for a pdf of those extracts.

I was particularly impressed that people sang along so well to “In Darkness Let Me Paint It Black” – see final embed below.

Janie got busy with the video app on her phone during the performances, so several highlights and lowlights were recorded. Below only the highlights as YouTube embeds.

I would recommend, if you were to choose only one highlight, Reuben Ard’s performance of William Byrd’s Earl of Salisbury Pavan, which was really quite magical performed in that wonderful setting on “electric virginals”:

Word is, most if not all of the visitors thoroughly enjoyed their afternoon at Royal Tennis Court, Hampton Court. Thanks again to our hosts, who made us feel so welcome and steered the event to sweet success.

Gresham Society Soirée, Including Þe Fair Weather Canticle, 12 December 2022

Gresham Professors Singing The Gresham Professors’ Song, With Thanks To Basil Bezuidenhout for the pictures and the “live music” video

Was it really t h ree years ago that we last enjoyed one of these soirées? Yup. Last year’s event had to be postponed at the last minute.

The only good news about that delay was that the Gresham music professor, Jeremy Summerly, who was unavailable to attend in person last year, was available this year. Splendid news in particular because his deep knowledge about and insights into early music were especially welcome in the matter of the piece that I had “uncovered in autograph manuscript form”, just before the pandemic.

*Long lost medieval canticle? We’ll return to this later*

Fortunately for all concerned, we had professional musicians to entertain us for the first half of the show, before we Greshamistas got the opportunity to ruin everything.

Actually, before the professionals got the chance to entertain us, the noisiest amateur of us all, Michael Mainelli, piped us in to Barnard’s Inn Hall in the now traditional style.

*Michael at full blast. Thoir an aire* yer cluasan, folks

Someone once asked me if I ever duet with Michael. My reply:

What would be the point? You’d only hear Michael.

Mercifully for all our ears, the professional team of David Jones and Sofia Kirwan-Baez soon established a pleasant tone to proceedings, both treating us to their fine keyboard skills as well as their excellent voices, with Part 1 of the show.

Sofia has a fine operatic voice, which really came to the fore when she sang the Massenet and the Puccini. David always entertains, not least with his “party piece”, Lehrer’s Elements Song, in which he subtly switches from “Harvard” to “Barnard’s” for the punchline. Also a lovely rendition of Misty, although I can never hear that song any more without thinking of the Gresham Society visit to the London Mithraeum and my resulting Mithras version of that song:

The London Mithraeum With The Gresham Society, 15 March 2018

Part 2 of the programme was a different affair, of course, with some regular and irregular antics.

Tim Connell updated a couple of literary standards, deliberately lowering our intellectual and linguistic standards in so doing, aided and abetted by Frank Cox & Mike Dudgeon

Maths Professors Wilson & Hart taught us how to sing numerical carols. Turns out, it’s as easy as 1-2-3…as long as 4-5-6-7 and 8 are also in your repertoire, naturally.

*Tristis opus non est beatus*, as PC Wilson might put it.

As for my little offering, Þe Fair Weather Canticle, it had been long in the process between “rediscovering” and performing.

I supplied Professor Jeremy Summerly with a copy of the “autograph” and a demo recording, the latter you can see below:

Professor Summerly very kindly gave this opus more than its fair share of scholarly attention, helping the audience to understand the historical significance of my “discovery” with a professorial dissertation on the piece. Unfortunately, that mini-lecture, a masterpiece in its own right, was not recorded for posterity on the night, but I do have some of Jeremy’s notes, which I can share with readers:

Of necessity, discoveries of new sources in the field of early music are less and less frequent as time goes on. All musicologists dream of finding a source of forgotten music, even more so a fragment that might fill in significant holes in our understanding of music history.

Yet such a discovery has been made recently. It is hardly surprising that such a fragment might turn up on the site of a medieval coaching inn, and even less surprising that this inn should be located in Middle England.

The musico-poetic gem þe Fair Weather Canticle, like much early music, surprises us through its apparent modernity. Like the brightly-coloured decoration of a medieval ceiling, or the dissonant harmonies and boldly-contrasting texts of a medieval motet, there is something shockingly modern about this ancient canticle.

Scholars will need time to consider the implications of this newly-found piece within the pre-Baroque jigsaw.

Meanwhile, the words and music should be enjoyed for what they represent: a perplexingly polystylistic mesh of jumbled ideologies and opaque thinking.

Professor Summerly then went on to examine the words of the canticle, noticing some astounding…in some cases shocking…similarities between those words and the words of subsequently well-known songs from periods ranging from the 12th to 17th centuries. In one case, even the 20th.

Finally, Professor Summerly, being an expert on early music, provided some historical context to my performance on an original instrument, which he kindly described as:

a rare and fascinating example of a gittern-ulele, an instrument probably of similar vintage to the canticle.

The instrument has an exceptionally sweet sound in the hands of an appropriate musician…or so we are led to believe, if only such a virtuoso performer could be found.

In the right hands, this gittern-ulele would quite possibly be, to the guitar-family, what Paganini’s Il Cannone Guarnerius is to the violin.

As for the gittern-ulele performance you are about to hear, many of you will surely be moved to tears when listening to the sound of this extraordinary old git?”

It was hard for me to follow that introduction, but I tried, after a subdued start. Basil recorded the moment for posterity – for which I am grateful. It is not every day that my work is professorially conducted, but the triumphant chorus at the end benefitted greatly from Professor Summerly’s expertise, as I had my hands full at the time:

For those who would like to study the words or are crazy enough to try singing along with the vids, here are the words:

Sumer is icumen in, þe nymphs and shepherds dance
Bryd one brere, groweth sed and bloweth med
And don’t you know, amarylis dance in green–ee-ee-een.

Lightly whipping o’er þe dales, with wreaths of rose and laurel,
Fair nymphs tipping, with fauns and satyrs tripping
Mister Blue Sky is living here today hey, hey hey.

Mister Blue Sky please tell us why, you were retired from mortals sight, stars too dim of light.

Hey you with þe angels face, bright, arise, awake, awake!
About her charret, with all admiring strains as today, all creatures now are merry…
(…merry merry merry, merry merry merry merry, merry merry, merry, merry merry merry merry merry merry minded.)

Mister Blue Sky please tell us why, you were retired from mortals sight, stars too dim of light.

Hey there mister blue, who likes to love, lhude sing cuccu,
Nauer nu, ne swik thu, sing hey nonny nonny nu.

Mirie it is while sumer ilast, in darkness let me fast,
Flow my tears, fairwell all joys for years,
Never mind, I joy not in early, I joy not in early bliss.

Mister Blue Sky please tell us why, you were retired from mortals sight, stars too dim of light.
Ba ba, ba ba ba ba, ba ba, ba ba ba ba, ba ba, ba ba ba ba, ba, ba x2

After the show, there was plenty of time for eating, drinking, chatting and making merry, as is the case at any good soirée. The Gresham Society Soirée is certainly always a good one.

An Exceptionally Long AGM & Dinner, The Gresham Society, National Liberal Club, 17 February 2020

I’m not one to whinge.

So I am not describing this year’s Gresham Society annual bash as “long” because the formalities took longer than promised.

But in truth, deploying the sort of barefaced nerve that might even make our current Prime Minister blush at the missed timescale, Tim Connell’s perennial boast that he would keep the AGM to within five minutes (or die in a ditch attempting it?) was blown once again this year by more-than-doubling the time to 11-and-a-half minutes.

No, the reason this evening should be remembered by all Gresham Society folk as The Long AGM & Dinner is because Ray Long CB was the guest speaker.

I am certainly not suggesting that the formal elements of the dinner were too long. The grace, toasts and Ray Long’s address were all delightfully short and well-directed. Ray, who is currently Master of the Information Technologists’ Company and a Past-President of BCS, spoke in part about artificial intelligence (AI), outlining the potential risks but also the monumental benefits that such technologies might bring.

Did Ray use AI to help compose and edit his charming address? We can only guess. Perhaps Ray himself doesn’t even know for sure; that would be spooky.

Yes, most of the evening was spent eating, drinking and enjoying conviviality, as always.

The Gresham Society crowd and their guests are such a warm and friendly bunch; this event is a great opportunity to catch up with Gresham friends. I always go home from such evenings feeling happy and uplifted.

As last year, Iain Sutherland again brought Bobbie Scully with him, which added some 1980s reminiscing to the 2020 conviviality. Bobbie admitted remembering little about a fight breaking out in the theatre when we were watching Long Day’s Journey Into Night several decades ago, but apparently such minor theatrical spats are small beer these days; the Royal Opera House is a better place to see bare-knuckle fighting.

Meanwhile, Basil was keen to introduce me to visiting music professor, Jeremy Summerly, as he thought that the good professor might appreciate knowing more about my Gresham Society soirée antics, e.g. the bash a couple of months ago:

Gresham Society Soirée, Barnard’s Inn Hall, 16 December 2019

As it turns out, fortunately, Jeremy Summerly is an early music expert with a sense of humour and a sense that there is no such thing as poor performance – in common with my early music teacher, Ian Pittaway:

A Renaissance In Baritone Ukulele Lessons, Stourbridge, 3 July 2017

Anyway, the point is, Jeremy Summerly and I had enough time chatting to realise that there should be some early music fun to be had at the next soirée, not least with a little “piece” I already have up my sleeve in readiness.

Basil also, very kindly, tipped me off to Jeremy Summerly’s superb guest lectures, the first two of which I missed but both of which are now available on YouTube (copyright issues having been overcome, it seems), so I passed a couple of very enjoyable and informative hours the next evening watching those:

I have also made a diary note to attend the next one on 2 April.

Another noteworthy element of the evening was the wine. I tried the white, a Bacchus from New Hall Vineyards in Essex, more in hope than in expectation, but I thought it really very good; as did Bobbie, who spent quite some time trying to persuade Iain to try it. The La Linda Malbec was also excellent – we should consider it for Z/Yen events, especially when our Linda (Cook) is organising them.

I’m rambling – and in danger of making this piece the only exceptionally long aspect of the event.

It was a lovely evening, as always with Gresham Society.

Gresham Society Soirée, Barnard’s Inn Hall, 16 December 2019

Is it really two years since the last Gresham Society Soirée? Yes. I wrote up the previous soirée thusly:

Gresham Society Soirée, Barnard’s Inn Hall, 14 December 2017

This time around, 2019, the programme looked like this:

Unfortunately, my magnum opus for 2019, which marks Sir Thomas Gresham’s 500th birthday, hence The Sir Thomas Gresham 500th Anniversary Song And Dance, was accidentally misnamed as the Sir Richard Gresham themed performance I gave in 2017. But I was able to put people right on that point pretty easily.

But before all of that, Michael Mainelli made a brief appearance to leave soiréeistas in no doubt that the show was about to begin, when he blasted our lug-holes with the sound of his bagpipes.

Michael Mainelli on bagpipes? Well I’ll be blowed!

Mercifully, Part 1 of the soirée was a highly professional and entertaining set by David Jones and Sian Millett, which gave us all plenty of time to recover from the lug-hole blasting and listen to the superb talents of this pair, who are very much becoming Gresham Society soirée favourites.

David demonstrated his vocal versality with material ranging from lieder to Lehrer. David’s rendering of Hochländisches Wiegenlied by Robert Schumann was a particular delight, not least David’s rendering of the non-Germanic word, “Carlisle” mid song, as was David’s perennial Tom Lehrer favourite The Elements Song, which David can peform better than anyone else I have ever seen attempt it.

Sian’s talents range from grand opera to musicals. Her rendition of Mon Coeur S’ouvre A Ta Voix, with David accompanying on piano rather than the more traditional orchestra backing, brought out the beauty of the melody and the words to my ears, enabling me to enjoy hearing that aria afresh. No recording of Sian and David’s performance, sadly, but those who want now to hear the aria might enjoy the 1961 Callas recording below.

Returning to Sian’s performances, her flirty rendition of I Cain’t Say No was great fun and went down very well with the audience.

Sitting in front of me was Bobbie Scully, with whom I had, in 1984, suffered an unfortunate fit of the giggles, when we accidentally attended a stilted Rodgers and Hammerstein recital, learn more by clicking here or the block below.

Rodgers & Hammerstein, For One Half Only, With Bobbie Scully, Theatre Royal Hanley, 2 September 1984

For the avoidance of doubt, Sian Millett’s soirée performance was absolutely nothing like the stilted recital of the mid 1980s; the audience laughter during Sian’s I Cain’t Say No was very much WITH Sian rather than AT Sian.

The tone changes for Part 2 of the soirée, which brings amateur talent and enthusiasm from within the Gresham Society to the fore. As if to lull us all into a false sense of security, the first couple of items – Robin Wilson on the recorder, followed by a recitation from Under Milk Wood by Martin Perkins – were suitably talent-filled and dignified.

Then it was my turn.

Actually, despite appearances, a fair bit of scholarship went into my piece. I discovered, quite by chance, while researching “Ding Dong Merrily On High” last year for the Z/Yen seasonal function, that Jehan Tabourot, aka Thoinot Arbeau, was a contemporary of Sir Thomas Gresham, the former being listed as either 1519 or 1520 in all sources I could find. Tabourot (under the pseudonym Arbeau) wrote, in the late 16th century, a book, Orchésographie, comprising dance tunes and dance moves he recalled from his youth.

Branle de L’Official, the tune that subsequently was used for Ding Dong Merrily On High, is one such dance from Arbeau’s Orchésographie.

The really strange coincidence about this, is that when I discovered the temporal connection between “Arbeau” and Sir Thomas Gresham, my Googling led me immediately to Ian Pittaway’s website and this superb article:

The pavan, the priest and the pseudonym: ‘Belle qui tiens ma vie’ and Arbeau’s ‘Orchésographie’ (1589)

Ian is my early music teacher. We had been talking in late 2017 about me possibly using Coventry Carol for the 2019 Gresham Society bash, but the Arbeau song and dance possibilities seemed to good an idea to miss.

Fans of Coventry Carol might like to hear Soul Music on BBC Radio 4, which was broadcast on Christmas Day 2019, but is still available through this link, which features Coventry Carol and includes Ian Pittaway talking about the history of the piece and the effect it had on him, with a bit of Ian’s rendition playing in the background.

Anyway, I did test out the song and dance idea with the Z/Yen team in 2018 with predictably hilarious results…

Z/Yen Seasonal Lunch And Brawl, Guildhall, 14 December 2018

…and just over a year later I inflicted same on the Gresham Society – except this time I had tailored the words to suit Thomas Gresham’s 500th birthday.

It would probably be to the benefit of all mankind if the Gresham Society soirée performance of this piece were lost in the mists of time, but unfortunately Basil Bezuidenhout had an accident with his mobile phone and inadvertently video recorded the darned thing.

I must say, the singing from the assembled throng sounds rather good, which is more than can be said for my singing that evening.

For the dance, I ever so slightly simplified the dance moves from this actual facsimile of the 1589 book:

Again, Basil had a mishap with his phone and the dance is recorded for all posterity:

Not much can go wrong in a dance like that, although I notice a couple of us ended up the wrong way round with our partners at the end of the first movement. Many thanks to David Jones for accompanying us on “virginals” and to Sian Millett for her delightful rendering of my silly words while we danced.

Anthony Hodson and David Jones then briefly brought a sense of decorum back to the proceedings with a rendition of the Elgar Romance for Bassoon & Piano, but then Robin Wilson and Tim Connell led the soirée past the point of no return in the matter of decorum. Song sheets that cover some of the residual malarky can be seen by clicking this link.

No such nonsense as the above 2017 rendition of Tinniat Tintinnabulum, dear me no. This year, instead, *Robin Wilson lead us in a more ballad-like latin canticle,* ***Reno Erat Rudolphus Nasum Rubrum Habebat***

In the tradition of topical comedy, Tim Connell, Mike Dudgeon & Martin Perkins rendered a French Brexit Lament – click here for the text of that pièce de résistance.

After all that, the assembled Gresham Society stalwarts needed reviving with a great deal of food and wine…

…so it was just as well that there were indeed plentiful supplies of both, enabling the remainder of the evening to become a highly convivial party. There was eating, drinking, chatting, laughing and general merriment, without, by that stage, the fear of imminent music, song or dance from over-enthusiastic soiréeistas.

As ever in the company of Gresham Society folk, a thoroughly warm-hearted and enjoyable time was had by all.

A Gresham Society Visit To Westminster Abbey Library & Muniment Room, Plus The Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Galleries, 12 April 2019

As if I don’t spend enough time hanging around this part of Westminster, I found myself, for the second time in 24 hours, hanging around in Dean’s Yard. But this time I was on a half-holiday, awaiting a tour of the Westminster Abbey Library & Muniment Room, with my friends from The Gresham Society.

The Library Collection is described through this link – click here.

The Muniment Collection is described through this link – click here or the image below, which depicts the Muniment Room and is copied from the linked page for the purposes of linking back to that page.

We were such a large group that we needed to be split in two. I wondered whether to mention Solomon at the point that Tony Trowles, Head of Collections and our principal guide for the afternoon, suggested an even division of the group. But I thought better of that Old Testament reference in the particular setting of the Westminster Abbey Library.

If you want a general background/introduction to Westminster Abbey, btw, you could do a lot worse than the Wikipedia entry – click here.

Anyway, my half of the group went with Matthew Payne to see the Muniment Room first. I think the more conventional way is to see the Library first, perhaps because the Muniment Room is seen to be the highlight.

In reality, I found the whole tour a highlight.

It was fascinating to see the Muniment Room, it’s storage chests some of which are 800 or so years old, it’s extraordinary mural of Richard II’s white hart and it’s stunning views across the Abbey.

But it was also fascinating to have Tony show us the Library and learn all about its transformation from a Benedictine monks’ dormitory into a theological library.

Further, some of the artefacts on show in the library were quite simply breathtaking. An Edward The Confessor writ, for example, which they are almost 100% certain is genuine (there is doubt over some of the oldest relics), made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

Public domain image borrowed, as permitted, from Wikipedia, with credit and referencing
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_the_Confessor#/media/File:Edward_the_Confessor_sealed_writ.jpg

After our private tour – even among Gresham friends it seemed extremely cosy in places – the wide-open spaces of the new Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Galleries seemed liberating.

The stroll and climb to the galleries was enjoyable in itself – around Poets’ Corner at ground level and then a charming new staircase with gorgeous views across to the Palace Of Westminster. What a shame to think of the shambles that is the political mayhem going on in that historic place at the moment.

But then the new galleries and the stunning exhibits on show, well set out for ease of navigation and all very well labelled/described.

While Westminster Abbey prohibits photography within its confines unless you buy a licence to do so, it does provide excellent imagery for those beyond its confines, such as these excellent short videos about the new tower and galleries. First up, the climb up the stairs of the tower:

Next up, the galleries themselves, described extremely well by the curator, the Dean and also Tony Trowles, who guided our library tour:

On seeing these wonderful artefacts with my Gresham Society friends, I felt a burst of communal, almost cult-like enthusiasm, that reminded me of our Gresham Society visit to the London Mithraeum last year:

The London Mithraeum With The Gresham Society, 15 March 2018

I wondered, briefly, whether the cult of Mithras (see above) or the Cult of Saint Edward The Confessor (yes, really, Westminster Abbey owes a great deal of its character to Henry III’s attachment to that cult) would be the preferred cult for us Gresham Society types.

I took some soundings…some might call it a mini-referendum…which was a very close run thing; 52%-48% approximately. As a heated, perhaps irreconcilable debate broke out amongst this group of hitherto convivial Gresham Society friends, I thought best to take my leave of the group swiftly.

For all I know, the remnants of the Gresham Society might still be debating the relative merits of their preferred cults in The Westminster Arms; at least, that’s where most of the group (or should I now describe it as a brace of warring factions) was last seen at the time of writing.

In truth, it was a thoroughly interesting and enjoyable afternoon out. Once again, thanks to Tim Connell for leading our field trips…also to Basil Bezuidenhout and others for helping to organise them.

It’s A Little Bit Funny – Three Evenings In Five Days, 11, 14 and 15 February 2019

For someone who is making a conscious effort to cut back on midweek evenings out, this was not a high-achieving week.

11 February 2019, BDO Binder Hamlyn Partners Reunion, Guildhall

It started with a gathering of former BDO Binder Hamlyn partners at the Guildhall. Michael Mainelli asked me to join him and Elisabeth in helping to host that event – the first regathering of those partners since the firm dissolved into Arthur Andersen and other firms in the mid 1990s.

Of course, I wasn’t a partner in that firm, but during my five-to-six years with the firm I did do most of my work for audit clients. I also did a couple of internal consultancy projects – such things were normally considered to be career-blight for consultants, but I was either considered to be sufficiently dispensable or savvy enough to survive such trials – I still haven’t worked out which.

Anyway, point is, I did know most of the characters who turned up at the Guildhall that evening, in the Members’ Dining Room, the very scene of the brawl I started, just a few weeks earlier, at the Z/Yen Christmas lunch.

Z/Yen Seasonal Lunch And Brawl, Guildhall, 14 December 2018

They are quite a centric bunch, the former Binder Hamlyn partners, in contrast with the quirkier group that descended on the National Liberal Club a few days later. Perhaps that explains why Michael didn’t trial his Gresham Society talk on humour in lectures. Instead, Michael made full use of his gavel and kept the formalities mercifully brief.

Actually it was a really pleasant gathering; just a shame there were none of the consultancy partners there who might have enjoyed the merry tale of my despair at my first assignment…

Reduced To Tears By My First Consultancy Assignment, 27 January 1989

…or that first musical jaunt to Oxford in 1989…

Music At Oxford At The Sheldonian Theatre & Bodleian Library, 7 July 1989

Anyway, I think the former partnership informally decided that it should regroup socially once every few years – certainly not leave it 20 to 25 years next time!

14 February 2019 – The Gresham Society Dinner – National Liberal Club

In fact we were on the way to the National Liberal Club when I discovered that Michael’s after dinner speech was to be on the subject of humour in Gresham lectures.

Excellent idea; it is always interesting when a professor chooses to speak on a subject about which he knows nothing…

…I said.

Michael laughed and then promptly added that joke to the start of his speech. It would be churlish to suggest that it got the best laugh of the whole speech, as there were lots of jokes in there…

…including, rather dangerously, I thought, one of my favourite intellectual jokes, the one about binary:

There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don’t.

I say, “dangerously”, because, of course, that is a joke that really only works properly on the printed page. As soon as you say “ten” or “one-zero” you have slightly killed the joke.

Had it been me, I’d have fallen back on my other favourite intellectual joke; the helium joke, which I think works much better orally than on the page, as long as it is delivered with good timing:

Helium walks into a bar.
The bartender says, “I’m sorry, we don’t serve noble gasses here”.
Helium doesn’t react.

Anyway, Michael’s after dinner talk was merely the apex of a very jolly evening. As usual, Tim Connell tried (and failed) to get through all the AGM business in five minutes. This time Tim double-failed; firstly by over-running in the first place, secondly by forgetting to re-elect the committee during the AGM bit which meant he had to hijack the start of the after-dinner revelry with that aspect of procedure.

Unusually this year we were graced with Iain Sutherland’s presence and he brought Bobbie Scully with him as a guest, which was a very pleasant surprise. Coincidentally, I had that very morning been Ogblogging about a visit to the theatre some thirty years ago with Bobbie to see the impenetrable Peter Handke play (or should I say dramatic poem?), The Long Way Round.

The Long Way Round by Peter Handke, Cottesloe Theatre, 8 July 1989

At the mention of this coincidence, Bobbie almost started hyper-ventilating as she remembers that particular theatre visit as quite the worst experience she can ever recall having at the theatre. If you click through you can read more.

Mercifully, Bobbie doesn’t seem to think that staying on for the second half was all my doing – she seems to think we both decided to stay out of charity to the performers, as we saw so many people leaving during the interval. So my memory of her begging me to leave during the interval and me insisting on us both staying is one of those false memories.

But back to the Gresham Society event, which no-one left early, even at the thought of an after dinner speech by Michael. It was, as always, a very convivial event with such interesting and friendly people.

Barbera Woodthorpe Browne organised a really charming touch for the evening – which ended up being on Valentine’s night this year due to availability of the venue – by sourcing large quantities of Valentine’s roses and seasonal gift bags enabling all of us to take the roses home to our loved ones.

15 February 2019 – Kim & Micky At Sanzio

The following evening Janie and I had dinner with Kim and Micky at Sanzio.

Picture from our previous visit in July 2018

I realise, looking at the picture from our previous visit, that we not only sat at the same table again but we even sat in the same places again. Here is my account of that previous visit:

Caution: This Restaurant Might Contain Nuts, Dinner At Sanzio With Kim & Micky, 13 July 2018

This time I was not required to sign any disclaimers in the restaurant, but Kim was very determined to prove that she is “good at logic” by trying to demonstrate some logic puzzles on the table, using glasses, bottles and the like to try to make those “pattern-grid” type puzzles.

Janie and Micky were utterly baffled by it. I kinda got what Kim was on about (for once) but seemed to irk her by suggesting that such logic puzzles are not the be-all and end-all of rationality and indeed formal logic.

Meanwhile Kim’s dinner table logic puzzles started to look and sound like an old duffer demonstrating military maneuvers or cricket field placings by moving the cruet around the table. And the more Janie protested that she doesn’t/cannot engage with such puzzles at all, the more Kim sought to explain, while insisting that Janie can.

Meanwhile, I have a funny feeling that Jean-Paul Sartre was sitting alone at the next table, contemplating existential logic. After dinner, I heard the gentleman say to the waitress, “I’d like a cup of coffee with sugar, but no cream”. The waitress acknowledged his order and Sartre returned to his ponderings. A minute or two later, the waitress returned and said, “I’m sorry, Monsieur Sartre, we don’t have any cream – is it OK without milk?”

I DID Want To Go To Chelsea, Gresham Society Visit To Chelsea Physic Garden, then The Other Side Of Hope, Curzon Chelsea, 30 May 2017

When Tim Connell sent round a circular announcing a visit to the Chelsea Physic Garden, I knew immediately that the visit would be a special treat for Janie and guessed that Linda Cook would also be very interested. I was less sure about Michael and Elisabeth; as it turned out Michael was keen.

Janie was very keen and had not yet booked in any patients for that day, so we basically decided to make it a date and took the day off.

There were 25 to 30 of us in the Gresham Society party, I believe. The weather was very kind to us; occasionally the clouds looked a bit iffy, but there was also some sun and certainly no rain.

The Original Sloane Ranger In His Garden

We got split into two groups; our guide was Anne, who seemed very well informed and proved to be good company.

To my mind, the best plant in the garden was Catharanthus roseus (Madagascan or Rosy periwinkle), which yields natural remedies for childhood leukaemia, increasing survival rates by orders of magnitude. Yet the most popular plant amongst our cynical, Gresham Society group seemed to be Veratrum viride (Indian Poke), which induces profuse vomiting and which some native American tribes use to choose their leader; on a “last candidate to throw up” basis. Going back to traditional, natural methods is sometimes a very good idea.

Janie asked Anne zillions of questions, many of which seemed to me to be more about the poisonous, nasty plants, rather than the medicinal, nice ones. Even more worryingly, I thought I heard Janie ask a few of times, “would you be able to taste this if you added it to food?” Perhaps I am mistaken about that. But when we visited the bookshop before leaving, Janie bought a small book on medicinal plants and a larger book on the poisonous ones. I think I’ll eat out for a while.

We enjoyed a spot of lunch/high tea at the Tangerine Dream cafe within the garden, which made for a very convivial conclusion to the outing. We always enjoy spending time with the Gresham Society crowd.

By the time Janie had concluded her book shopping, I thought we might be running a bit late for the movies, but I had sort-of forgotten that the car journey from the Chelsea Physic Garden to the Curzon Chelsea was a very short one.

So we had time to book Janie’s birthday treat (a preview of the new V&A wing) before stepping in to The Other Side Of Hope. We thought this was a great movie – very interesting, at times amusing, at times shocking. It is about a Syrian refugee who lands-up seeking asylum and then working as an illegal in Helsinki.

Here’s a trailer:

Highly recommended.

Then we went back to the flat to round off our very enjoyable day with a dinner of delicious leftovers from the weekend and salad. I prepared it all, not allowing Janie anywhere near the kitchen today, she had done her bit over the weekend. Continue reading “I DID Want To Go To Chelsea, Gresham Society Visit To Chelsea Physic Garden, then The Other Side Of Hope, Curzon Chelsea, 30 May 2017”

Gresham Society AGM and Dinner, National Liberal Club, 4 February 2016

A convivial evening at the National Liberal Club; the Gresham Society AGM and dinner. Michael Mainelli said he was going to miss not only the pre-AGM drinks but even the AGM, so suggested that I leave the office ahead of him. But by the time I had got there and made his excuses to everyone, he arrived; a good 5-10 minutes before the AGM started.

In the hands of Tim Connell, an AGM is neither painful nor lengthy. So there was time for more chat between the AGM and dinner. Several people were complimentary about my maiden baritone ukulele performance at December’s Gresham Society soiree, which certainly made me feel good at the end of a long day.

I sat next to Elisabeth Mainelli on one side and Noel-Ann Bradshaw from the University of Greenwich on the other side, which made very pleasant company; indeed at Gresham Society functions, pleasant company is more or less guaranteed.

The speaker was Michael Binyon, whose tales of derring-do as foreign correspondent for the times didn’t quite match Boot of The Beast (Scoop is one of my favourite novels) but raised several laughs none-the-less. A memorable tale about Messrs Foot and Healey meeting Brezhnev sticks in my mind, as does the problem of dictation down the phone line which led to the reporting of “dead sea squirrels”. What a by-gone era story that makes, although it occurred within living memory).

No doubt Michael Binyon had to dodge a bullet or two as a correspondent, but he struggled to dodge a “question-bullet” about the Times pay-wall, claiming that the iPad version of the Times is making money now. As the economists, accountants and operational researchers on our table might put it; that depends on how you count.

I imagine that the merriment continued in the bar long after I sloped away, but at the end of a long day I decided to quit while I was still feeling very much on top. A most enjoyable evening.

Thomas Gresham Nativity Song, Gresham Society Soiree, 9 December 2015

To Gresham College at Barnard’s Inn Hall, for the biennial Gresham Society soiree. Those of a musical or light entertainment persuasion put on a short variety show, as the scene-setter for a jolly social. The usual assortment of super people gathered; a mixture of professors, former professors/lecturers and Gresham College enthusiasts.

I wrote a version of “I’m Henery The Eighth I Am”, to describe the events that might have led to Thomas Gresham’s birth and eventual financial heroics. I decided to give my recently-acquired baritone ukulele skills an outing this time, not least because I have recently imported a Roosebeck Baritone Baroq-ulele which certainly looked the part for this “piece”.

This was quite a daunting performance for me – I only took up the baritone ukulele 18 months ago, having eschewed all instruments since the disaster that was my attempt at the violin as a small boy. So this was to be my first performance in front of an audience.

Further, the song I chose did not have any simple chord versions to be found on the web; the chorus of course (a big hit for Herman’s Hermits and Joe Brown before them) but not the verse.

So I needed to work out the chords for myself – see attachment with my hand-written notes. I wrote “capo 1” all over it, as I chorded it in G but it was originally written (and indeed Herman’s Hermits sang it) in A minor. In the end, though, I sang and played it without the capo, i.e. in G major, as the baroq-ulele was a little quiet for the Barnard’s Inn Hall and my voice copes a little better the deeper I go.

The audience participation elements worked well and I am told the performance was well received. In any case, as the compere Professor Tim Connell put it at the start of one of the other acts that evening, “it’s not all about music tonight”. That was certainly the case for my little rendition.

The text that follows has the original verse and chorus, by Fred Murray and R P Weston, followed by two verses of my own. Shown in the text below the music notes and then further below as viewable JPEGs and also a downloadable PDF.But, as Michael Mainelli said, there’s probably only one music hall in the world that will really appreciate my Thomas Gresham verses for the song; Barnard’s Inn Hall.

♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬ ♬

THE THOMAS GRESHAM NATIVITY SONG

(Song to the Tune of “I’m Henery The Eighth, I Am”)

FIRST VERSE

You don’t know who you’re looking at, now have a look at me,

I’m a bit of a nob I am, belong to Royaltee;

I’ll tell you how it came about, I married widow Burch,

And I was King of England, when I toddled out of church.

Outside the people started shouting, “Hip hooray”;

Said I, “Get down upon your knees its Coronation Day.”

CHORUS

I’m Henery the eighth I am, Henery the eighth I am, I am

I got married to the widow next door

She’s been married seven times before

Everyone was a Henery (AUDIENCE: Henery)

She wouldn’t have a Willie or a Sam (AUDIENCE: or a Sam)

I’m her eighth old man named Henery,

I’m Henery the eighth I am.

SECOND VERSE (different from the first; different from the original too)

I’m not so good with money if I’m left upon me own,

So I called my mate, Dick Gresham, who could organize a loan;

I said, “I need the wonga, but I can’t afford the fleece,

Get terms I can afford or else we’ll end up just like Greece”;

Dick planned long finance, so he said, “thy will be done,

Your brood will still need Greshams’ help, I’d better pop a son.”

CHORUS

I’m Henery the eighth I am, Henery the eighth I am,

I am I got married to the widow next door

She’s been married seven times before

Everyone was a Henery (AUDIENCE: Henery)

She wouldn’t have a Willie or a Sam (AUDIENCE: or a Sam)

I’m her eighth old man named Henery, I’m Henery the eighth I am.

THIRD VERSE (different again!)

So Dick, he had a son named Tom, as smart as smart could be,

And when my Ted went brassic, Tommy saved the currency;

My Mary fared no better, Tommy had to bail her out,

And Liz retained his services, though she was more adroit.

All raise a glass to Tom, without him we’d be poor,

Bad money drives out good, I say, and call it Gresham’s Law.

CHORUS AND OUTRO

I’m Henery the eighth I am,

Henery the eighth I am,

I am I got married to the widow next door

She’s been married seven times before

Everyone was a Henery (AUDIENCE: Henery)

She wouldn’t have a Willie or a Sam (AUDIENCE: or a Sam)

I’m her eighth old man named Henery, I’m Henery the eighth I am.

H-E-NRY, ‘Enery, (AUDIENCE: ‘Enery)

‘Enery the Eighth I am, I am, Henery the Eighth I am!

The Thomas Gresham Nativity Song With My Chords and Hand Written chords.

Click here or below for a link to see Harry Champion’s original version of this song.

The History Of The Court & Explaining The Game, David Best, Lesley Ronaldson & Jack Josephs

Tea & Cake

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