Tag: Yugoslavia

Yugoslavia, A Pre-NewsRevue Lyric Eventually Used In NewsRevue, 1 July 1991

One of my very early efforts at lyric writing was this lyric about the break-up of Yugoslavia. The original is dated 1 July 1991 – I’ll need to upload a scan of the printout for that exact lyric. The version that follows – version 2, was updated and extended for NewsRevue in 1992 in the very early days of my involvement there. I have a feeling that it was actually used in the show briefly in the late summer/early autumn of 1992. If not Paula Tappenden’s cast then the one after.

Or did John Random use it in one of his subsequent runs/shows?

Anyway, here’s version 2:

YUGOSLAVIA (Version 2)

(To the tune of “Istanbul not Constantinople”)

VERSE 1

Serbia is in Yugoslavia,

Now there’s Croatia and also Slovinia,

Plus there’s Bosnia and then Macedonia,

Two that I don’t know,

And Mon-te-neg-ro.

VERSE 2

Lets go back to old Yugoslavia,

No you can’t go, there is such a palava,

You may get shot up and never recover,

One day you’re in Bled,

Next day bled and dead.

TRITE MIDDLE BIT 1

Even tennis stars,

Our commentators fear;

They can’t say without a glitch,

Goran Ivanisovitch.

VERSE 3

Take a break out in Yugoslavia,

No I won’t go there, I think I would rather,

Go to Greece or maybe Czechoslovakia,

Why did poor Yugoslavia get the veto?

Cos they went all to pieces after Tito.

 

(Instrumental – with “do, do, do’s”, “wo, wo, wo’s” and outbursts of “Serbia”, “Croatia”, “Bosnia”, possibly accompanied by some suitably violent business)

 

TRITE MIDDLE BIT 2

Even tennis stars,

Have put their lives at risk,

Monica Seles groans and grunts,

Even she had death threats once.

VERSE 4

See a shrink if in Yugoslavia,

Cos the countries shrinking farther and farther,

I’d prefer to be in the Intefarda,

Why is poor Yugoslavia now the pits?

Cos the Serbs are a bunch of violent gits.

Please note that the above version was dated 5 July 1992 – also aimed to be topical for Wimbledon but more than a year before the actual murder attempt on Monica Seles’ life.

Below is  a YouTube of The Four Lads singing Istanbul (not Constantinople)…

…or if you prefer the zappy They Might Be Giants version:

You can read the lyrics of Istanbul (not Constantinople) by clicking here.

A Week In Dubrovnik, Yugoslavia, In The Hotel Argentina, Prior To A Short Mediterranean Cruise, 17 to 23 August 1975

Dad had almost certainly booked this holiday from a bucket shop using whatever paltry savings he had left after shelling out for my Bar Mitzvah. I suspect he got good bang for his bucks on this one, holding out until the price became too tempting for him.

The diary sheds little light…

…but we do have some photos and cine. Not much – I think dad (and mum)’s enthusiasm for holiday photos and the like had waned by 1975. Still, we have a few prints, a short snippet of cine and a box of stereo photographs, all of which I have digitised but I have not yet (end 2025) turned the individual images from the stereo box into digital stereo images.

Also, we have my memories of the place – assisted by the pictures.

I think this young man might have been East German. A lot of the people we met at that hotel were.

I communicated with a lot of the younger people (who were mostly East German, Yugoslavian or Russian) through chess and cards.

I’m pretty sure this patient gentleman is/was English – or at least spoke excellent English – my parents got pally with him and his wife.

Please note the writing pad with a posh-looking floral cover. Dad had bought up a job lot of those, which he thought might serve me well as a budding scribbler for quite some time.

31 December 2025 – the one I am looking at has family genealogy notes in it and is still in use with many pages left, as is/has the orange one behind, which contains some comedy and whimsy writing notes, with plenty of space still for more. Also to my right, the writing box, Bar Mitzvah gift mentioned in my article about the Bar Mitzvah itself – propped open with a bag of biros..

By this stage of my then short life (I was still not yet 13), I clearly fancied myself as a hand-held cinematographer, following in my father’s footsteps:

We have, from this holiday, four-and-a-half minutes of cine, all of which is either filmed in Dubrovnik itself (when we went there on the Wednesday) or in and around the hotel. It can be seen minutes 7’20 to 11’50 on this reel:

Confusingly, we had been to Dubrovnik at the end of our 1973 cruise, so you can also see Dubrovnik at the start of this reel.

Sadly, no film from the 1975 cruise survived. I know I shot some, but suspect that the film got spoilt by getting caught in the camera or inadvertently exposed to light prior to process. That used to happen sometimes.

I also have a few impressionistic memories from our week in the Hotel Argentina.

I really liked the place. It seemed really cool – especially the great big round leather chairs and ceiling lamps – that felt futuristic/Star Trek like to me at that time. It just looks quintessentially 1970s to me now.

There was a strange late middle-aged East German resident who used to walk around the hotel all day and would occasionally approach people who were talking, put his finger to his lips and say, with a thick German accent:

Shhhh – there is sickness here.

Dad thought he was probably on temporary respite release from a nut house. (Dad’s choice of phraseology – I am merely reporting it to you, dear reader, not approving my father’s choice of terms). I was fascinated by this bloke and used to look forward to his unexpected interventions.

For years afterwards, if I was making more noise than dad wanted to hear, he would put his finger to his lips and incant, “shhh, zer is sickness here” in his best mock-German accent.

You can see all of the scanned prints from this holiday through this Flickr link – here and below:

095 Dubrovnik 1975

The unedited stereo slides (in their raw and multiple form) can be seen through the following Flickr link – here and below:

IMG00234

A Two Week Mediterranean Cruise Ahead Of Starting At Alleyn’s School, late August 1973 –Day Thirteen: Dubrovnik

Dubrovnik From the City Walls

For the context, itinerary and links for this entire holiday, click here or the link below:

A Two Week Mediterranean Cruise Ahead Of Starting At Alleyn’s School, late August 1973 – Context, Itinerary, Links & Day Zero: Porto di Rimini via Luton Airport

The tenth and final port of call (before the return to Rimini) was Dubrovnik.

Mum, Dad & I all really liked this place. Indeed, we returned to Dubrovnik a couple of year’s later, so we must have liked it a lot. I also have a feeling that the touring time for Dubrovnik was quite limited, so we felt that we hadn’t had a chance to take a good look at the place.

Dubrovnik From The Ramparts

Beside Orlando’s Column (right of picture)

Me On Main Street With Orlando’s Beyond

The Old Harbour

Dubrovnik From Above

Customs House (left, presumably)

There’s also two or three minutes of cine, from 15’30” until around 18’00” or so.

It seems my young friend joined us in touring Dubrovnik – possibly her mum wasn’t feeling good or just didn’t fancy touring that day. You can see my mum buying a plaque facsimile, which ended up on the dining room wall at Woodfield Avenue for nearly 40 years. I think it depicts the Exodus or something of that kind.

In the remaining minute or two of the film, you can see us back on the boat, at one point speaking with the girl and her mother. The film beyond the 20 minute mark is of the following year’s holiday.