Lootin’ USA, NewsRevue Lyric (Unused), 2 May 1992

John Random must have thought I was obsessed with Californian news, because I submitted this less than two weeks after California Here I Go. Perhaps I thought it might replace the morbid execution piece, which by its nature became old news rather quickly.

Unsurprisingly, this “looting” one wasn’t used. But it was submitted in the same pack as You Can’t Hurry Trusts, so you can’t fault John and the cast for their discerning choice of a winner when they saw one.

LOOTIN’ USA

(To the tune of “Surfin’ USA”)

 

VERSE 1

If everybody was in turmoil,

And causing an affray;

Then everybody’d be lootin’,

Like Californ-I-A;

You’d see ’em wearing their shell suits,

With beard and sandals too;

They’d all be breaking their curfews,

Lootin’ USA.

 

CHORUS

Insurrection USA  They’re starting fires in Long Beach,

Depredation USA  And in Fort Lauderdale;

Conflagration USA  There’s violence in Pasadena,

Turbulation USA  And in San Quentin jail;

Consternation USA  All over Manhattan,

Deflagration  And down in Santa Fe;

 

Everbody’s gone lootin’;

Lootin USA.

 

VERSE 2

We’ll all be planning out a riot,

And then we’ll light my fire;

Then go and nick some hi-fis,

To build a funeral pyre;

Insurgence and arson,

We’re gonna plunder LA;

Tell the fuzz we’re all lootin’

Lootin’ USA

 

SHORT INSTRUMENTAL (Preferably including some dancing that vaguely resembles people beating each other up)

 

Everbody’s gone lootin’;

Lootin USA.

Everbody’s gone lootin’;

Lootin USA.

Here is a really weird vid of The Beach Boys making minimal effort to mime Surfin’ USA while wearing bizarre beach outfits:

…and here are the lyrics to Surfin’ USA.

 

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