Tag: Lord’s

England v Sri Lanka Day One, Lord’s, 3 June 2011

Unusually the first day of a Lord’s test match on a Friday.

That day I went with Charles “Charley The Gent Malloy” Bartlett, Ian “Iain Spellright” Theodoreson and Mark “Uncail Marcas” Yeandle.

The following extract from my e-mail to Mark and Chas the day before reveals the expectation of a very hot day:

Weather looks set fair for tomorrow.

Please could you both bring plenty of water with you.  I’ll have my hands full and Ian T was muttering about “fancy juices” as his contribution to the soft drink side of things, but I think we might all need good old fashioned (still) H2O.  Especially given the weather and the picnic I have planned.

Don’t forget your booze rations also – as if I had to remind you about that!…

Mark threatened (and saw through his threat) to bring some Frittenden strawberries with him. His strawberry offering the previous year had gone down an absolute treat. If you look closely at the picture of Charles below from that report, you can make out the colour and shape of a Frittenden strawberry. The 2011 batch was delicious, but I believe the 2010 batch was “peak strawberry”.

Click the photo or the link below to see that May 2010 match reported in full

England v Bangladesh Day 2, Lord’s, 28 May 2010

A few years later there was a potentially ugly fruit incident, as Ian and Mark were reunited with me at the test on the same day. Mark brought famous Frittenden strawberries while Ian brought a giant bag of plump cherries that he had been unable to resist en route. This competitive soft fruit showdown could have been very bloody indeed, but it mercifully led only to MAD (mutually assured delectation):

England v Sri Lanka, 3rd Test Days Two, Three and Five, Lord’s, 10, 11 & 13 June 2016

But I digress.

Back to planning for a very hot June day in 2011. Chas wrote back threatening to soak me in factor 30 sunscreen.

I don’t recall the exact nature of Ian T’s fancy juices, but I think they might have been the flavoured water variety, which does work rather well on a ludicrously hot day.

Ian T seems to specialise in weather extremes when he comes to Lord’s with me. Our 2014 visit (which will eventually be published on King Cricket, I believe) was one of the hottest days I ever remember at Lord’s and Ian nearly melted.

The scorecard suggests that we saw England have a very good day – click here.

I suspect that I was quite careful with the booze, because I was going to see a late night concert of Paco Peña at the Wigmore Hall after stumps. I suspect that all of us were a bit careful with the booze, partly because it was a very hot day.

I do recall this one, despite the heat, being an especially enjoyable, dreamy day at Lord’s. England were hot off the back of an away Ashes win and had even won the first test of the summer the previous week. What could ever, possibly go wrong again for the England test team?

Several Seasonal September Soirees, 1, 8, 9, 14 & 18 September 2010

1 September: Dinner With Mum At the French Cafe

Picture borrowed from Quandoo – click the pic to see that website.

Mum was especially keen on this Balham eatery towards the end of her time at Woodfield Avenue. It was conveniently close to the house too, so I would sometimes pick her up and take her to The French Cafe for dinner. This was one of those occasions.

8 September: Middlesex CCC Kit Sponsors Party

Daisy came along this time around – a rare visit to one of these parties by her. I seem to recall that the event had been especially good the year before and my report had triggered a “may I come to one of those?” question to which the answer was, “of course you may!”

I think this one was in the press bat of the old Warner Stand, if my memory serves me well.

I think this was the evening we spent quite a lot of time chatting with the late, lamented Derek “The Diamond” Britain and some members of his family. We also chatted with some of the players, nibbled at food and drank wine.

9 September: Ivan Shakespeare Memorial Dinner

Ivan Shakespeare Memorial Dinners had been going for just over 10 years by then. In fact, I missed the 10th anniversary one, in June. I am writing this soon after the 20th anniversary one was wiped out by the Covid lockdown in the spring of 2020.

The headline photo was circulated by John Random ahead of that June 2010 get together, which I missed. So I never discovered the context of the regal look. Perhaps John, feeling a little insecure, wanted to assert his authority with regard to our gathering.

Anyway. he was certainly in charge in September and circulated some more pictures and bants:

“The lovely Victoria”, as John describes her.

Many thanks to all those who came out to the Cafe Rouge on Thursday. If you weren’t there you were either sorely missed or we all slagged you off behind your back. No, seriously. We had a good turn-out, including – may I say – the Three Graces in the form of the lovely Harriet, the lovely Victoria and the lovely Jasmine, who is not only lovely but can show you all how to save up to 10% on Travelodge. Harriet came in her pyjamas. OK, with some pyjamas. In a bag. From La Senza. Anyway, it’s not often we have so many women come to the Ivan Shakespeares and I hope this trend continues.

Personal highlight of the evening, though was Keith Wickham reading out the scores to the quiz in the voice of James Mason.

Finally, Where Are They Now No. 127: Mark Flitton spotted on location in legal drama Silk playing the owner of a dangerous dog. Many of you will have fond memories of Mark in Noel’s wonderful Smoking Doctors sketch. He also went to Edinburgh for us and performed in both the Newsrevue show and Whoops Vicar.

Mark Flitton with John Random
Colin Stutt

I do recall Keith Wickham’s James Mason impression that evening. I have always liked his James Mason, but there was something about Keith reading out the quiz scores in the style of James Mason that especially tickled me and I do remember giggling a lot. Perhaps it was the fourth glass of vino wot dunnit.

Anyway, as always a fun evening with the NewsRevue alums.

14 September: Middlesex CCC Forum & Party & The Robert Browning

I must be honest and admit that I remember very little about this particular forum and party, other than ending up at the Robert Browning Pub with Barmy Kev and others, where we continued the libations and played bar billiards until chucking out time.

Mercifully, I don’t need to remember much, as Barmy Kev documented the forum, party and even the bar billiards in a ball-by-ball report – click here to read it in all its gory…I mean, glory.

Coincidentally, the Ivan Shakespeare Memorial Dinners were, for a while, held at the Robert Browning, until the inhospitable nature of the place (last orders for food were taken ridiculously early) drove us across the way to Cafe Rouge.

Writing 10 years on, I note that the Robert Browning is under new management and has been rebranded as The Eagle. Bar billiards is still listed. Might be worth giving it another try once lockdown is over.

18 September: Pickled Herring Of the Year “Fast Breaking” At Jacquie Briegal’s Place

Schmaltz Herring from a later year – the schmaltz often wins

The family gathering which includes the Pickled Herring Of The Year awards has been described at length in other years, e.g.

Pickled Herring Of The Year Competition and Other Delights, 12 October 2016

In 2010, mum would have been there, as would Michael and Dorothy, me, Janie, Hils and possibly some special guest stars, such as Jacquie’s grandson Josh. Mum might even have had a sleepover at Jacquie’s that year; I think she did that once or twice after dad and Len had died.

The 2010 spread would have looked much like the 2016 spread depicted. But the winner of the award that year has been lost in the mists of time.

Middlesex v Surrey Day 3, Lords, Stumpfmerde & MTWD Match Report, 30 July 2010

Another day of county championship cricket at Lord’s that needs a bit of explaining.

Michael Mainelli and I had formed a bit of a tradition that, each year, we’d spend a few hours at Lord’s watching first class cricket and chatting strategically/laterally/crazily about our business, Z/Yen.

In earlier years, before such sessions took place at Lord’s, we called them “Stiermerde sessions”, not that bullshit came into it…of course it didn’t. Once such sessions were at Lord’s, we called them “Stumpfmerde sessions” instead.

Michael must have enjoyed it because his e-mail that evening included:

Great Stumpfmerde and thank you…

My response included:

Indeed I have cleared my e-mails and shall down tools. But I couldn’t do so before scribbling and uploading today’s match report.

http://www.cricketnetwork.co.uk/main/middlesex-ccc/s66/st161035/surrey-completely-clerihew-cornered

Very enjoyable day. And productive Stumpfmerdwise and bookwise too.

Oh, and you really did miss lots of excitement by leaving early – 6 wickets in the last hour, five of them to the youngster Toby Roland-Jones who is the product of your charming neighbour’s brother at the Middlesex Academy. What a happy coincidence!

Just in case anything ever goes awry with the MTWD website, I have scraped that strange match report to here.

I must say that it had completely escaped my memory that I witnessed that exceptional breakthrough performance by Toby Roland-Jones on a Stumpfmerde day – in my mind I would have completely separated the two events.

Here is a link to the Cricinfo scorecard for that match.

I’m glad I spotted the star quality that evening. Neville Cardus would not have spotted it better. Nor would Cardus have reported in clerihews.

A Day Of Neutral Test Cricket At Lord’s, Australia v Pakistan Day Three, With Paul Deacon, Mat & Tim, 15 July 2010

Paul Deacon, taken a few week’s earlier at England v Bangladesh

The Pakistan cricket team had just started their 10+ year sojourn following a terror incident in their homeland. England hosted a couple of neutral tests and I was keen to sample the delights at Lord’s.

To join me that day, Paul Deacon (this was to be his last hurrah of test cricket before he and his family went into self-imposed exile to Canada) along with Mat and Tim from the gym.

This was the second of two farewell treats for Paul, the first being England v Bangladesh a few week’s earlier:

England v Bangladesh Day 2, Lord’s, 28 May 2010

Paul clearly enjoyed himself at the neutral match but did not take (or at least did not post) any photos on the second visit. The headline picture and the one below are from the Bangladesh day.

But Paul did write this:

Hi Ian


just to say another big thank you for a fantastic day at Lord’s.
Thoroughly enjoyed it. A nice tumble of wickets today!

Will fix a time for us + partners to meet up for a meal. Do you like Indian? Chinese? Thai? Or all 3 on one plate even?

Paul

In the end it took us some years to get together family-wise but it was worth the wait when we did:

A Day With The Deacons, Music Exchange & Lord’s, 8 August 2017

If by any chance you want to know what happened in that particular cricket match – here is the scorecard. Day Three had left the match poised.

Z/Yen Nets At Lord’s Followed By Drinks In The Star, 6 July 2010

Ahead of the impending Z/Yen cricket matches that season (which ended up being scaled back to a pairs tournament in Kensington Memorial Park), Steph Rochford was keen to have a go at the Lord’s academy and I was keen to encourage same.

Here is a summary from our extended correspondence a few weeks earlier:

At the moment it looks like you, me, Jez, Ben, Alex and little Si.
Thanks,
Steph

From: Ian Harris
Sent: 07 June 2010 15:57
To: Stephanie Rochford
Subject: RE: Cricket Nets?

Steph

Booked for the 6th – two nets and one coach.

Try not to overextend the numbers – 3 or 4 people in each net is the “sensible maximum” if everyone is going to get a decent go, so 6 to 8 for the two nets.

Don’t forget that you’ll need to sort out protective gear if you are going to have a go at keeping – helmet should be easy in any half-decent sports shop but “abdominal protectors” and the like for women cricketers are probably only available at shops that specialize in cricket quite a bit. Unlike the helmet (which you really do need to try on and make sure is right for you), you could probably get those other bits and pieces on the web. Keepers gloves and keepers pads we have in the Z/Yen kit.

Best

Ian

In the end I think it was about half-a-dozen of us in the nets and jolly good fun it was too. I think Steph might have abandoned her wicket-keeping ambitions quite quickly but I think she did sensibly procure an abdominal guard.

The other thing I remember very clearly about the evening was a gathering of about 10 of us in The Star – a now late lamented pub in St John’s Wood. Four or five Z/Yen people gathered there and were waiting for those of us from the cricketing party who fancied some libations after our net.

Star, St Johns Wood, NW8 (6934060680)

The soccer world cup was going on at the time. Alexandra Flynn, who has some Uruguayan extraction, was “put through the wringer” by Steph with regard to a controversial moment a few day’s earlier. At one point during her monologue, Steph, more or less without pausing for breath, said words to the effect of:

…oh my goodness I’ve just heard myself sounding off about this – I’d better stop right now…

…which came across to me as very self-aware, in a eureka moment sort of way. There was much myrth about that and indeed throughout the evening, which I remember fondly as a very pleasant few hours with the Z/Yen team.

Middlesex Till We Chai, MTWD Match Report, Middlesex v Bangladeshis, 5 July 2010

While thinking through what to do with my old MTWD match reports on Ogblog, I stumbled across this one – I think one of the last (or should I say most recent) reports for MTWD. I thought I’d retroblog it right now.

Here’s a link to the article on MTWD, in all its glory with pictures and everything.

Given SportNetwork’s track record, I have uploaded the text of my MTWD pieces into Ogblog, so if the above “proper” link doesn’t work, you can at least read the text here.

Finally, if you are the sort of person who cannot bear to read a match report without a scorecard, here’s a link to the scorecard.

 

 

 

Middlesex v Australians, Lord’s, 19 June 2010

Looks cold…IS cold!

One of my favourite King Cricket “match reports” this – it is the story of a freezing cold day at Lord’s in mid June with Daisy (Janie) watching Middlesex play a match to help warm up the Australians.

Here is a link to the King Cricket match report.

Just in case anything ever happens to King Cricket, here is a link to the scraped version.

Here is a link to the scorecard and all those geeky details on Cricinfo.

I don’t think we stayed until the end – we went to the National Theatre that evening and I’m pretty sure we went back to the flat first.

Middlesex v Surrey T20 At Lord’s With Z/Yen Team, 17 June 2010

I almost missed out on reporting this one – in my diary with question-marks and the like, but it seems we organised a mini-outing for the very keen to this match.

Looks as though Jez did most of the organising:

I’m just dropping you all a quick line with the arrangements for tomorrow night. Firstly, I may be slightly late as I have to go and get my wedding registered in North London, but as long as they run on time (famous last words), I should be at the gates with plenty of time to spare. As a precaution, I have given all of your tickets to Simon S…

I chimed in with some of the more vital logistical details:

I suspect it might be quite busy on the Tavern Stand side again tonight, so I suggest that all those who arrive in decent time come straight in and help me to hold sufficient good seats…I’ll probably aim for a little closer to Father Time in the Lower Tavern Stand, Jez, for the “Turkey Corner” effect.  It’s the least we can do for brother Ben.

“Brother Ben” is Jez’s younger brother who, perhaps for contrarian reasons, supports Surrey almost as fervently as Jez supports Middlesex. Other guests that night were the two Kiwi Simons (Strez and McMullen), Ben Morris, Heinrich Groenewald and Louwrens Verwey.

The scorecard – click here – suggests that this was not one of Middlesex’s better matches nor one of the better matches from a neutral spectator’s point of view.

I’ll guess that Simon McMullen’s (first left in the picture) favourite memory of visiting Lord’s was the previous year – click here or picture below.

2009 at Lord’s. Simon M, Me, Linda, Jez, Garry Sobers and Nick

Middlesex v Essex T20 At Lord’s With John White & Family, 13 June 2010

I remembered that we had done the Lord’s T20 thing with John and family a couple of times, but it wasn’t until I found diary/e-mail references to this Sunday afternoon gig that I realised that there were several years between visits.

I had written up the 2007 visit under assumed names for MTWD – see this Ogblog piece for the text of that masterpiece.

I recall that, in many ways, the 2010 outing was more successful. None of the Friday afternoon/evening stress – this was a Sunday afternoon outing in good weather.

I think the girls had genuinely enjoyed the Lord’s visit in 2007 so had been really looking forward to this afternoon visit and they weren’t disappointed.

John was possibly a little disappointed by the result – another “close but no cigar” match for Essex. Here is a link to the scorecard.

I seem to recall the weather smiling on us that first half of June, which made the unseasonable cold snap the following weekend all the more surprising…but that’s another Ogblog story all together – click here for that.

Middlesex v Sussex T20, Lord’s, 3 June 2010, Then Middlesex v Northamptonshire Day One, Lord’s, 4 June 2010

The diary suggests that I originally planned to go with Michael to Lord’s on 4 June day for a “stumpfmerde” (bullshit session at cricket), but as we had a mini works outing the night before to see a T20 match between Middlesex and Sussex, I have a feeling that Michael and I moved the “stumpf” until later in the season.

The Thursday mini works outing comprised me, Jez, Monique, Steph, Rich and Grant. That season, Jez and I were organising several mini-outings to the T20 matches, rather than the slightly larger whole team outings that became the norm in later years. The weather was especially good that June – as Monique wrote the next day:

Thanks for last night. It was so nice to be able to sit in the sun! And now to take the mickey out of Jez…

The sun failed to shine on Middlesex that night in a cricketing sense – click here for the scorecard.

Still, I took the Friday off and went to Lord’s to see Day One of the Northants match, probably taking a wad of reading with me, as was my wont.

I can see that I had an exchange of messages with Peter Sheldrake, aka Comebackgatt, with a view to meeting up at Lord’s which, on this occasion, didn’t happen.

What do I mean, “on this occasion”? It never happened. Despite several attempts.

Still, at least Comebackgatt wrote up the day for MTWD – click here.

Here is a link to the scorecard – Middlesex fans of a nervous disposition shouldn’t look.

I don’t think I stayed much past tea as Janie and I were meeting Anthea and Mitchell later:

Come, Been and Gone, aka I Like My Job, Michael Clark Company, Barbican, 4 June 2010