The problem with me tackling TV related news stories is that I knew almost nothing about them. I hadn’t had a TV for years.
Indeed, writing 25 years later, I had to Google “Don Miami Vice” to discover that this lyric is about Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith.
I do recall at that time Janie being especially amused by the “Hello phenomenon”, which meant that a couple featured in Hello magazine looking happy together invariably split up acrimoniously soon afterwards…
…but I don’t think this lyric got used much, if at all, by NewsRevue.
_ CRAPPY TOGETHER _
(To the Tune of “Happy Together”)
VERSE 1
DON:Imagine Melanie and me,
A working girl by day and night, she’s full of shite,
Like Richard Gere and Cindi too, we mainly fight,
Unhappy together.
MEL:And when I call Don up, we scream and shout,
That’s when I can get hold of him; he’s mostly out,
When Hello gave that interview, we both made out,
We’re happy together.CHORUS 1
DON:I can’t see me sticking with dog shit like you for all my life;
If you’re with me baby I just want to spew when you’re my wife.VERSE 2
MEL:Me and you and you and me,
No matter your Miami Vice, pretend that we;
Are blissful for the youngsters who, think families,
Are happy together.CHORUS 2
DON:I can’t see us acting the role of good sports, it must look wrong,
MEL:Smiles in Hello just means goodbye in the courts before too long.VERSE 3
DON:Me and you and you and me,
Like Rosanne Barr and Arnold live unsuitably;
We ought to chuck the towel in soon or else we’ll be,
So crappy together {oh-oh-oh-oh}
MEL:I’m light as a feather {oh-oh-oh-oh}
DON:The end of my tether {oh-oh-oh-oh}
BOTH:We’re crappy together {mmmmmmmmm}.
At least the lyric relies on a super tune – here is a video of that wonderful band The Turtles performing Happy Together. Howard Kaylan could unquestionably gain entry to the pavilion at Lord’s in that attire (and happily sit next to Fingers). Mark Volman has some explaining to do about his use of the trombone (or lack thereof)…is it possible that the lads are miming in this vid?:
Below is a video with the same track, but with lyrics on the screen: