I think this was one of the best lyrics I wrote for NewsRevue.
It was almost certainly the quickest, in terms of creative process.
The idea for it – based on the government’s imposition of VAT on domestic fuel for the first time in the UK – popped into my head as a Circle Line train approached High Street Kensington. I grabbed a piece of paper from my attache case, boarded the train and started writing.
I was done by the time we arrived at Notting Hill Gate – perhaps 90 seconds later, I still have the piece of paper somewhere – I’ll scan it and add it once I go through that part of my physical archive.
There is also a story attached to my witnessing the song’s first ever performance – a couple of weeks or so later. Keith Wickham was directing the show and I was very keen to attend the opening night; 27 May 1993.
I was in Manchester on business and arranged to leave quite early on the Thursday afternoon to be sure to arrive back in London on time. But I hadn’t accounted for several junctions of the M6 motorway to be a blocked by an accident, which meant hours of traffic jams and diversions.
I remember clearly writing off the idea of going home first…then writing off the idea of eating a proper meal before the show and eventually even writing off the idea of getting a beer and a packet of crisps in before curtain up. I think I drove much too fast once I got past the hazard and was lucky to get to the Canal Cafe Theatre at 20:00 on the dot and in one piece, just in time for curtain up.
I’m pretty sure that the crowning glory of that dash was, for me, to see Domestic Fuel performed and I’m pretty sure it was Rosie Cavaliero who performed it that night – perhaps Keith can confirm or deny.
Anyway, here’s the lyric:
DOMESTIC FUEL
(To the Tune of “Everything I Own”)
VERSE 1 – OLD BIDDY
Fuel sheltered me from harm,
Kept me warm, kept me warm;
Fuel gave my light to me,
‘lec-tric-ly, ‘lec-tric-ly;
But Tory ministers are cruel,
By taxing my domestic fuel.
CHORUS 1 – STILL WITH THE BIDDY
So I must give everything I own,
Give up my light, my hearth, my phone,
And cut my expenses to the bone;
Just to heat my flat again,
And to treat my sore chilblain.
VERSE 2 – A CRUEL TORY
This is someone who’s old,
Decrepit and bold,
Who is taking hand outs for granted;
We shall lose her one day,
Hypothermia, say,
Then there’s one less pension we must pay.
CHORUS 2 – STILL THE CRUEL TORY
(To audience)Cos we have taxed everything you earn,
(To Biddy)Now it’s the old must take their turn,
{BIDDY: eh}
We’ll ignore health and age concern;
{BIDDY: mustn’t grumble}
Just to balance books again,
Lower interest rates again,
Then we’ll tax her once again.
{BIDDY:I don’t want to be any trouble.}
Ben Murphy made a good recording of this one – you can listen below:
Not quite the power of the original performance – superbly done by Rosie Cavaliero – but that original performance is sadly lost in the mists of time.
If you want to know what Everything I Own sounds like when sung by Ken Booth, click here (where you can also read the lyrics) or watch the embedded vid below:
