Coppers Are Dressed As Hippies, NewsRevue Lyric, 31 May 1992

This one went down really well with the NewsRevue audience and ran for a long time.

I remember being a little disappointed that John Random didn’t use it towards the end of his April to June 1992 run, which was in full flow when this one was written. But I now understand more about the frantic nature of producing NewsRevue; this number would have been a real challenge to add to the pot (as it were) and do well mid-run.

Anyway, Paula Tappenden and her cast picked it up straight away in late June/July and did a fabulous job with it. The number was revived by later casts too, I’m pretty sure.

I recall Harriet Quirk being especially complementary about this one; I think she liked it.


(To the tune of “The Teddy Bear’s Picnic”)



If you go down to the Plain today,

You’re in for a big surprise;

If you go down to Stonehenge today,

You’ll see police in disguise.



For solstice time means unwanted guests,

The Fuzz are after heaps of arrests,

And that’s why lots of Coppers are dressed as Hippies.



Every piggy-wig in the force,

Is sure of a chance to bust;

The Hippies always have herbal smokes,

Speed, Acid and Angel Dust.



So all the filth that ever there was,

Is gathered there for certain because,

Today’s the day the Force infiltrate the Hippies.



Hippy time for PC Plod,

He’s in the drug squad,

He’s wearing a syrup and false beard;

Kaftan worn and sandal shod,

And using words like “hey”, “wow”, “man”, and “weird”.



Thousands of folk mill about,

Just watch them dance and shout,

And sometimes set off a flare.


At six o’clock the chief calls it off,

And they’ve not made one arrest,

Because there aren’t any Hippies there.


(Perhaps two Copper-Hippies simultaneously put their hand on the other’s shoulder and say “You’re nicked”)

Here is Henry Hall and His Orchestra with “The Teddy Bear’s Picnic” – I make no apology for the publisher’s placement of the apostrophe – but just dig the clipped tones of the singer:

Here is the lyric of “The Teddy Bears’ Picnic”…that’s better apostrophe-wise.

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