Let’s be honest about this – corruption in football and/or complex legal cases involving footballers is not really my sort of story. I didn’t even know how to spell Bruce Grobbelaar‘s name, nor which team(s) he played for, until I looked it all up just now (May 2019).
No, I must have been persuaded to write this lyric during a NewsRevue writers meeting, by concocting the opening line there and then.
What little evidence I have suggests that this lyric was never used. The specific cases against Bruce Grobbelaar remain somewhat moot, apparently, while the general public opinion charge of dishonesty stuck.
BRUCE GROBBELAR’S HAT
(To the Tune of “Young, Gifted and Black”)
VERSE 1
Bruce Grobbelar’s hat,
Oh what a con pulled off by him;
Inside Bruce Grobbelar’s hat,
It’s filled with dung up to the rim;
If you’re digging real low,
There is one bet you should know;
Under Bruce Grobbelar’s hat,
Is a fat cat.VERSE 2
Bruce Grobbelar’s hat,
That’s what they mean by a hat trick;
Talking Bruce Grobbelar’s hat,
It has more beaver than his chick;
When it’s hiding his bung,
There’s a stink like cows’ dung;
But in Bruce Grobbelar’s hat,
You’ve such a pratt’.
Below is Young Gifted And Black, performed by Bob & Marcia, with lyrics on the screen: