Phillipa Graham – Page 2 – Ian Louis Harris

A Good Month For The Worms, 2 August, 4 August, 9 August, 24 August 2008

Lots of Worm activity (i.e. Janie’s “Wormleighton” family and friends) during August 2008 if my diary is to be believed, but no photographic evidence. For more detail on some of these activities, we might need to ransack the attic and retrieve Janie’s diaries.

Saturday 2 August – Phillie.

My diary also has “Anth” crossed out, so I think the original idea was for Anthea and Mitchell to visit when Phillie was with us, but I think they came the following week and Phillie alone stayed with us at the maisonette and had dinner. Tony was away on business if I recall correctly/

Monday 4 August – Middlesex v Somerset floodlit.

I took Paul (Belmonte) that evening and gave him the pavilion experience for some of the game and also I recall watching a fair bit from the Upper Edrich Stand. I think this was only the second floodlit game at Lord’s; at least only my second experience of it. Here is a link to the scorecard.

Saturday 9 August – Anth

Not sure what we did but quite possibly Anthea and Mitchell came over for dinner. I think my diary would have more detail if it had been a bigger adventure than that.

Sunday 24 August – Worms

The Monday was a bank holiday of course. This will almost certainly be Hil and Chris; I think we might have all have gathered at their place in Bristol – i.e. including Phillie, Tony and Charlie. I think this was the year that Janie and I went down just for the day – a late lunch barbecue – then drove home. Quite a success I seem to recall.

Correction/update: It is clear from Janie’s diary that she and I stayed at the Hotel Du Vin in Bristol that time – possibly our first stay in that place. We stayed in Berringer and at that time they parked us at the hotel. Still a success though, as described.

Several Minimally, Strangely Or Barely Documented Evenings, Plus A Family Event In Chipping Norton, Late September 2007

20th September: TS Awards
That would be a Third Sector Excellence awards night, at which CharityShare the Best Charity Partnership Award. I minimally wrote a Now & Z/Yen piece about it here at the time.

22nd September: Jacquie & Len’s Yom
Traditional gathering for the breaking of the fast, not that many of us fast. Even fewer this year, as this was the first such gathering without dad. I’m not sure anyone was quite on best form that year with the shock of it all, apart from Jacquie who will have laid on a magnificent feast as always.

Briegal table from a later year but the look would have been similar.

26 September: Middlesex AGM?
This cannot have been the AGM, which has to be in April, so perhaps it was just an end of season forum. Sportnetwork has lost the vital 2007 MTWD reports, but fortunately this one was written by Barmy Kev who sent his report to me for editing and uploading. So here it is:

MTWD Lost Masterpiece: Barmy Kev’s 2007 End of Season Forum Report – Unedited Version, 26 September 2007

27 September Kim & Micky
Janie and I went to see Micky’s new offices in Hatton Garden and then went on for a meal with Kim & Micky. I cannot remember where we ate that time but it might well have been The Bleeding Heart.

29 to 30 September

We went out to Chipping Norton to help Charlie celebrate her 21st birthday. We stayed in the Crown and Cushion, where the event was held. Janie and I took The Duchess with us.

I remember we hated staying in the Crown and Cushion. Several times we hinted to Tony that we’d prefer to stay somewhere else, but he would insist that the management had changed or a refurb had been done since the last time…

…but in truth our sense of the place was that it simply got worse every time we stayed there.

You’re not exactly spoiled for choice in Chipping Norton.

Anyway, it made sense to stay there on this occasion because it was the venue for the big event. The family gathered as did friends and in-laws. Charlie seemed very happy with the event and I recall some informal gatherings before and after the main event to make a bit of a weekend of it.

Janie made some notes in her diary which i think were the original plans for our visit to Cambridge to see Charlie a few months later – which was a better documented and photographed event from our point of view:

Cambridge Weekend with Charlie, 26 to 28 January 2008

Holiday Weekend With Hil and Chris In Bristol, 25 to 27 August 2007

I think this might have been our first stay at the Hotel Du Vin in Bristol. It was very good and friendly back then.

We tried the Bistro there on the first evening, taking dinner with Hil and Chris there.

On the Sunday, Hil & Chris threw a family barbecue for the holiday weekend/my birthday, which was all rather pleasant.

I wasn’t in the most celebratory mood that year, just a few weeks after dad’s death.

Still, the weather smiled on us and Hil laid on a pretty splendid barby, as one might expect.

We also enjoyed the big Hotel Du Vin breakfast, I seem to remember. And the big bath in the room we had chosen.

Janie and Phillie’s Party, Sandall Close, 23 June 2007

This was a great party. Wonderfully well organised by Janie, with themeing help of course from Kim.

The theme was tropical, as Janie and I had been to Cuba and Jamaica earlier that year.

It was the early days of iPod use for me, but I made up a well cool iPod playlist, which I have maintained (as best I can) and printed in pdf form here – 2007 Caribbean Party In Full.

The food was catered by Jo Buckingham of TRUFFLEhound. Olivier the butler and his team were hired to look after the guests. We also put a lot of effort into designing an amazing rum cocktail to be a centrepiece for the drinks.

So what could possibly go wrong? Well, unfortunately I went down with the raging sh*ts overnight the night before, which left me not much use to anybody all day. I tried to sleep it off for most of the day, hoping to be fit by late afternoon onwards. But I didn’t get far when I tried getting up and helping out around 16:30, so I went back to bed again until just before the guests arrived.

As it turned out, I managed to get through the party more or less, but only by keeping away from the wonderful food and drink we had put so much effort into specifying. It really was only a 24 hour bug-type thing, so I was able to try leftovers on the Sunday, but that’s hardly the same thing.

Kim quasi-secretly hired a “butler in the buff” for the party. Naturally he arrived and needed to change soon after I had sloped off to the bedroom to lie down for a short while – as it turned out an even shorter while than I had intended. Here is a discreet picture of the gentleman:

There are lots of photos from this event – some of them leaving very little to the imagination in the “buff butler”department. The full monty (as it were) of the photo album can be found here.

A Day Boating On The Thames At Bray With Kim & Micky, Tony, Phillie & Charlie, 26 July 1998

Three Men In A Boat (…& Four Women)

This trip won’t have been my idea.

No doubt a plan mainly cooked up by Janie and Kim and Phillie. Notes in Janie’s diary suggest that she took control of the arrangements:

9:30 to 5:30… Boat trip… £150. Nobby and Phil. Deposit £500. Ring Elisabeth Mainelli. Open cabin cruiser £150. Bray Boats. Nobby. [presumably the boat man, not my car, which was at that time, coincidentally, a Honda CRX named Nobby].

*Janie, with Nobby, at his last resting place*

Us lot. A boat. A river. What could possibly go wrong?

Actually, I don’t think anything went wrong. I think we had rather a splendid day out, in fact.

I did have a contretemps with a swan at one point…

…but we resolved our differences and were able to share the river in harmony for the rest of the trip.

*Presumably that’s Nobby, with Phillie and Janie supping wine beyond*

Janie cannot really add to the memory pile, other than concurring that we all had a memorable and enjoyable day.

Update: Charlotte indeed remembers:

Oh my goodness, yes I do remember this.

I think it may even have been the trip where my Dad felt he was the boating ‘expert’ and got grumpy when Mum and Janie took control of navigating some of the Locks!!! He may have had a point though as I think mum’s shoe fell into the river as part of said activities at one point!!

But the most shocking point to make is WHAT was I wearing?! Honestly, that’s a crime against humanity!

There are some other photos. This link (and the picture link below) reveals the whole roll.

A Day Out With Charlie (& Family?), London Planetarium Plus, 6 June 1998

In truth I remember little about this day out in London.

Charlotte, who was about 12 at the time, might remember it a whole lot better. I’m not sure that Phillie & Tony were with us for the outing, although I’m pretty sure that Phillie, if not both of them, joined us at least for the meal at Good Earth in the evening. Both my diary and Janie’s diary describe the outing as “Charlie”.

The London Planetarium was clearly something that Charlie was keen to see, so see it we did. Janie’s diary is full of copious notes booking the place up and arranging to park in Chiltern Street.

After that, the trail gets murky. Janie was clearly considering Planet Hollywood or The Fashion Cafe for an in-between stop off, but I have a funny feeling we ended up in Madam Tussaud’s, which came as part of the deal with the Planetarium. Possibly we snacked there (or at the Planetarium) for lunch, especially as we had a dinner booked.

I think I might remember having been at the Fashion cafe, especially if all of them supermodels were hanging around in there, as implied by this write up. I did used to see Claudia Schiffer in Moscow Road occasionally in those days – I think she had a pied-à-terre around there. But I digress.

I’m pretty sure it was the Knightsbridge incarnation of The Good Earth that we tried that evening and jolly good food it was too.

Update: Yes Charlie does indeed remember more than us!

Charlie writes:

Wow, Ian, thank you for sending me that diary reminder from 1998. I remember it so well…even to the extent of Janie doing my hair in an ‘on the side’ ponytail and me wearing a hideous luminous yellow jumper 🤢

It was a wonderful weekend; we did Planetarium and M Tussauds followed by lunch at Fashion Cafe. I’m not sure mum did join us for dinner in the evening as I have a memory of going to tennis with you both on the Sunday and me having a tennis coach. I think you both also bought me some Speedo swimming costumes?!!!!!!!

So we did go to the Fashion Cafe, but I guess the supermodels weren’t there that day. Still, it’s just as well we went when we did, because the Fashion Cafe apparently opened in London in 1998 and went bust in 1999! The global story is of an even more spectacular failure.

The tennis coach would have been Jeremy or Shola, probably the latter, at Lammas Park in those days. It was Shola who introduced me and Janie to Boston Manor.

A Short Visit To Tony, Phillie & Charlie In Germany, 17 to 20 February 1995

Tony, Phillie & Charlie Graham (Janie’s twin & family) were living in (or rather just outside) Bad Homburg, in Hesse for a few years. We only visited them there once. This was that visit.

Charlotte was still a primary school kid so of course she was in a show and we went along to see it. The music was Carnival Of The Animals by Saint-Saëns. The children dressed as animals and danced.

Charlie was the elephant, Phillie in pink

The Graham Family had taken a town house on the outskirts of the town; modern build but the shape of a Georgian or Victorian town house in England – i.e. several floors with more or less a room per floor.

Janie and I occupied the basement spare room which could have been a granny flat.

Phillie’s OCDs were in full swing by then, so if we used the bathroom we’d here the patter of feet down the stairs soon after and Phillie would be in there cleaning. She’s have been fine in the time of Covid, he realises writing this up in early 2021.

We had a day out as best we could at that poor weather time of year – Tony fancied Heidelberg so we bundled into his Merc and off we all went. It was a good choice and the weather was not too bad. The vista in the headline picture is from there.

Don’t call me a square…oh I see, a picture of me IN a square

On Sunday morning I recall military-style operations in order to deposit garbage at the municipal dump. Apparently such matters are verboten auf sonntag, but such rules are not for Phillie so off we all went for some civil disobedience. Tony’s penance was to clean his car’s hubcaps afterwards with various accessories including, at one point, a toothbrush.

You learn a lot about your nearest and dearest if you stay with them for two or three nights.

On the Monday, we bade them goodbye and spent a few hours in Frankfurt before our flight home. We visited the Goethe House, which I loved. We also had time to take a lunch of Schweineshaxe which is a bit of a rare treat favoutrite for both of us and put us in a thoroughly good mood for our flight after a very enjoyable long weekend with the kin.

After Returning From Our Travels, A Busy Period Running Up To Christmas & Twixtmas, 14 to 31 December 1993 & Beyond

I had allowed an additional day to sort myself out after our return from our long break, so the delayed return…

A Dreadful Journey Home From Bali, Via Jakarta, Bangkok & Abu Dhabi, Worthy Of Complaint, “Courtesy” Of Garuda Indonesia, 12 & 13 December 1993

…was less problematic for me than it was for Janie.

Janie has not made that mistake again since – we both tend to allow plenty of leeway and sorting out time after our travels.

I had some pleasurable things to do as well as hard work on our return – a NewsRevue Smoker on 16th December – the concept of such smokers is explained in my 40th anniversary piece – here and below:

NewsRevue 40th Anniversary Party, Show & Smoker, Canal Cafe Theatre, 18 August 2019

…and a BDO Consulting Xmas lunch the next day. Not sure where we ate that year – but it mught have been the Bleeding Heart again – in any case I won’t have been interrogated in the 1988 mode – click here or below for that story:

Binder Hamlyn Management Consultants Christmas Lunch Virtually All Day, 14 December 1988

Janie took quite a bit of work over that first weekend back – 18 & 19 December. My diary is silent about the weekend. there was talk about meeting up with Kim & Micky on Monday 20th for dinner, but I think we canceled that out, again perhaps pressure of work and dread of meals out during that holiday season.

Janie even took a couple of clients on Christmas Eve, whereas I (still a BDO salaryman for the last holiday season) needed to use up my accumulated holiday days to avoid losing them. I had Microbee come to look at my cockroaches that morning instead.

I went to my parents on Christmas Day and Janie saw her mum. Janie and I got together for the holiday season on Boxing Day.

We spent part of the Twixtmas period at Janie’s and part of the time at mine. Phillie, Tony & Charlie were around that season and when they wanted to stay at Janie’s, we decamped to mine.

I think we took the three of them to the flicks at Whiteley’s on Tuesday 28 December. For sure we took them to see The Secret Garden at some point during that period. I think Charlie (aged 6 or 7 at that time) got a lot more out of that experience than any of the rest of us. I am pretty sure it was on that occasion, while walking from my flat to Whiteley’s, that Tony opined to me on the sanity (or otherwise) of Janie’s family; judging Janie to be the sanest one but not delving into where that assessment might stand on other benchmarks or spectra of sanity.

It was my good fortune to be spared the family trip to Bristol during Twixtmas, not least because I had some client work to do that Twixtmas (the International Transport Workers Federation didn’t shut down for Twixtmas).

Janie and I got together again for new years eve – a quiet one if I remember correctly.

I think we spent a fair chunk of that time going through our holiday pictures, and why not?

After spending the first couple of days of the new year at mine, as the family were still around, we then switched back to Janie’s place after another of those Worm family meals on Bank Holiday Monday (3rd January) at the North China Restaurant – still there as I write in January 2020. (The restaurant, not the Worm family).

So we spent the next weekend (8th/9th) at Janie’s; a quiet weekend by the looks of it.

Dinner With Phillie, Charlie & Others, But Where?, 3 July 1993

Janie’s diary says that Phillie [& Charlie] arrived on the Friday (2 July) and that Janie and I stayed at my palce that night. I’m guessing that the previous visit at Easter all squeezing into Sandall Clsoe had made that idea fall from favour. There was no need, given my flat’s proximity.

Janie’s diary says 6:45 at Restaurant “arrange three taxis”, so I am guessing that Pauline joined us as well.

But no clues as to the location.

It might have been North China again – I think we did all go there more than once and that location would have seemed ideal for triangulating those three addresses.

Easter Weekend With Phillie, Tony & Charlie In Ealing, 8 to 13 April 1993

My diary says that I played bridge with my gang at Tessa’s place on the Thursday evening. That would have been Tessa, Andrea and Maz.

Janie’s diary says that Phillie & family were arriving that day and that they were having dinner “at mum’s” that Thursday evening from 6.00 and that I would be coming over 12.30.

I think I had a key by then. Or this might have been the occasion that resulted in me having a key.

Anyway, Janie’s diary says that we all went for a meal at North China on the Friday evening. This is the gathering of Pauline, Phillie, Tony, Charlie, Janie and me, all around a Chinese restaurant table, that i recall so well from our early time together. I think we only ever did that as a group of six the once.

The diaries are very light on what we did. Possibly we didn’t do much.

To some extent Phillie, Tony & Charlie were probably using Sandall Close as a base to do other stuff.

Where the heck did everyone sleep at Sandall Close?

Anyway, we were all still talking to each other come the Tuesday, as the diary says we six (including Pauline) had a dinner party at Sandall Close on the Tuesday evening.

Janie and I both worked that day too.

I think the family stayed on with Janie until the Wednesday afternoon.

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Update: Charlotte indeed remembers:

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Update: Yes Charlie does indeed remember more than us!

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