Category: Work Life

Z/Yen Christmas Dinner At Caldesi, 10 December 1998

Photo: Mike Quinn / Caffè Caldesi, Marylebone Lane, W1

I remember this Z/Yen Christmas event being an especially good meal. We were depleted in numbers that year for some reason – I think one or two illnesses – so Kim & Micky joined us as guests rather than allow paid-for dinners go to waste.

I wrote up the event for the Now & Z/Yen newsletter, which survives on-line despite several deportations in the intervening 25 years – click here.

Just in case a future deportation upsets the above link, here is a scrape of that page. And just in case you don’t like clicking, here is the raw text I wrote in 1998 that became the relevant paragraph on that page:

Hark! The Herald Angels Sing
[xmassy picture]
The annual Z/Yen Christmas stuffing took place at Caldesi, our favourite Tuscan restaurant. Z/Yen staff bravely fought their way through six courses, including Jane Beazley’s birthday cake, as well as through one badly mangled Christmas carol, to the tune of “D-Mark! Z/Yen Angels Sing”. Contrary to our seasonal hopes, the heavens did not flood the party with D-Marks (current currency of choice in the run-up to the Euro, as recommended by one self-interested wife), nor were angels or singing much in evidence. A great time was had by all and huge relief sighed by the restaurant staff when they realised that Z/Yen people were not going to conduct quantum physics experiments on their fibre optic Christmas tree.

I particularly like the reference to quantum physics experiments, especially as, 25 years later, we really were conducting quantum physics experiments (specifically Einstein’s two clock time dilation relativity experiment using NPL nano-clocks), rather than writing about quantum cryptography , some apparatus from such experiments was on the site of our 2023 Christmas lunch.

The Now & Z/Yen write up also refers to Michael’s attempt at a seasonal lyric – this 1998 one was his first for Z/Yen. Let’s just hypothesise that Michael is better at quantum physics than he is at song lyrics. Evidence below:

D-MARKS! Z/YEN ANGELS SING
(Sung to the tune of “Hark the Herald Angels Sing” or “Gloria in Excelsis Deo” in the Mariah Carey style)

“D-Marks!”, Z/Yen angels sing

Glory to the Euro thing

Peace in Europe, markets wild

Blair and Schroder reconciled

Joyful all recessions rise
Join the Bank of England’s sighs
With Zeee/Yen consultants claim
Markets are in may-eh-hem

“D-Marks!”, Z/Yen angels sing
Glory to the Euro thing

Glo….oh….oh…oh…oh….ohria

In consultants’ fee-eees
Glo….oh….oh…oh…oh….ohria

In consultants’ fee-eee-eees

Z/Yen by highest fees adored

Z/Yen for those who can afford

Late in time, does Ian come

Often late, the favoured one

Z/Yen, so fresh the clients see

Hail, the astronomical fees

Pleased as gods with men to dwell

Z/Yen as blasphemous as hell

“D-Marks!”, Z/Yen angels sing
Glory to the Euro thing

Glo….oh….oh…oh…oh….ohria

In consultants’ fee-eees
Glo….oh….oh…oh…oh….ohria

In consultants’ fee-eee-eees

The Very Second Z/Yen Charity Cricket Match – The First With The Children’s Society, 25 August 1998

We returned to the scene of the first Z/Yen charity cricket match, which had taken place just a few week’s earlier…

The Very First Z/Yen Charity Cricket Match, Barnardo’s, 22 July 1998

…again to play with Barnardo’s, but this time also with The Children’s Society.

I know that Ian Theodoreson and Bob Harvey gave us and their Barnardo’s charges every encouragement to make these evenings happen, but I have a feeling that neither of them made it to either evening.

Anyway, it was a very jolly evening and a great chance for people to get to know each other as well as mess around a bit playing cricket.

Not only did Barnardo’s still supply a bunch of dudes who knew what they were doing – see photo above…

…The Children’s Society was also blessed with some half-decent cricketers, including Chief Executive and glove man Ian Sparks:

Ian Sparks on gloves, Harish Gohil at bat; presumably this was warming up pre contest
Charles “Charley The Gent Malloy” Bartlett – starting as he meant to go on

I can’t remember in detail the playing conditions we came up with for this particular evening, but sort-of having three teams in an after work round robin in August was never going to work brilliantly as matches. I have a feeling we played sort-of eight a side with additional supply fielders from the sides that weren’t batting.

No slide rule – but the Barnardo’s score book and my own trusty light meter
Reservoir Dogs but without the ultraviolence? Kevin Parker (striding, front left), Rupert Stubbs (hatted, central), Michael Mainelli (arms folded in disgust, right).
Spot the ball (obviously going uppishly to backward square leg, that’s me batting)
Mainelli looks relieved to have been dismissed.

I still think the whole idea had started with Kevin Parker and some of the Barnardo’s team he was working with – I wonder if I can extract a confession from him.

Kevin probably doesn’t realise quite what a Z/Yen tradition he kicked off. Kevin was long gone by the time Garry Sobers came to watch us play, for example…

The Day Garfield Sobers Watched Me & Z/Yen Play Cricket, Lord’s, 30 June 2009

…but I digress.

We had a lot of fun with the Barnardo’s and Children Society folk in that summer of 1998.

Below is a link to all the pictures from both of the 1998 matches:

Cricket_1998 (1)

The Day The Heavy Rollers Entered My Consciousness & Indeed When My Devotion To Cricket Entered Theirs, 23 July 1998

With thanks to DALL-E for collaboration with the images

This is the tale of a memorable moment, a short and sweet vignette, that went on to help forge many years, indeed decades of friendship and kinship over cricket.

The Sweet Anecdote Of That July Day

I had arranged to spend the afternoon with Jeff Tye at a Children’s Society project in Mitcham; one that Jeff had chosen to be a pilot in our seminal performance measurement and recording project, MART.

I think I had already arranged to visit my parents in Streatham that evening, so I think there was an element of opportunism in the choice of project, although I recall that Mitcham was one that Jeff was especially keen to involve.

I had played cricket for the first time in many years the night before – a match between tiny Z/Yen and great big Barnardo’s…

The Very First Z/Yen Charity Cricket Match, Barnardo’s, 22 July 1998

…so cricket would have been very much at the front of my mind. All the more so, because the third test match between England and South Africa was starting that day.

I had arranged to pick Jeff up from Children’s Society HQ, having spent the morning with another client relatively nearby (Regents Park).

Jeff was a relatively new client to me then – I think I had only met him a couple of times before this day. I remember rehearsing in my mind a way to broach the question of possibly putting the radio on with test match special as we drove from Clerkenwell to Mitcham. I ended up with a form of words along these lines, just before starting the engine:

Please feel free simply to say no, but would you mind if I put the radio on with test match commentary as we drive from here to Mitcham?

Jeff beamed from ear to ear.

Oh my goodness, I’d been wondering all morning whether or how to ask you exactly the same question. I’m so pleased you asked me!

I thought Jeff might give me a hug, he seemed so pleased.

As we drove along, Jeff explained to me that almost everyone I knew and was working with in that charity was fanatical about cricket, not least: Ian Sparks, Edward Bates, Charles Bartlett, Nigel Hinks and himself.

He also explained that he and several others (including Nigel and Charles) had recently spent a day at Edgbaston watching the first day of the test series.

Jeff and I did our bit at that Mitcham project. When we came out, the sun was shining on a glorious summer’s day. I had arranged to drop Jeff at Tooting and then go on to my folks.

Janie, with Nobby, at his last resting place

I had recently acquired Nobby; my wonderful souped-down Honda CRX, which was convertible by dint of removing its solid roof. Jeff was keen to enjoy the benefit of that, even for a short drive.

You’ve got to take advantage of that feature when you can. How many times have you taken the roof off? [Once before, I think was the answer. Perhaps twice.] Anyway, you’ve got to show off that feature to your parents by arriving at their house with the open top.

Of course Jeff was right. So there we were – big Jeff – quite clearly oversized for a small car like Nobby – in the passenger seat – me – in the driving seat – driving along Tooting Broadway and Tooting High Street, listening to the cricket.

South Africa were only four down and nearing 200. I stopped at some traffic lights. Then a crescendo from the radio:

…the umpire’s given him…

Jonty Rhodes, LBW, b Angus Fraser.

Jeff and I both cheered and (to the extent that you can leap when wearing a seatbelt) leapt in the air. Passers by must have thought that we were a pair of lunatics.

The Traditions Forged

Those summer weeks of 1998 were, for me, a reawakening of my devotion to cricket. We had arranged a second game of cricket with the Barnardo’s people; I re-engineered it to include Children’s Society folk as well as Z/Yen and Barnardo’s

The Very Second Z/Yen Charity Cricket Match – The First With The Children’s Society, 25 August 1998

Of course, I cannot write the story of the actual origins of The Heavy Rollers. That story can only be written by one of the people who attended Day One of the Edgbaston Test in June, witnessing a rare example in those days of England batting long.

In fact – let’s name names here – the true Heavy Rollers origins story can probably only be written by Nigel “Father Barry” Hinks, who can also relate tales of proto-visits to matches with colleagues before the 1998 outing that is deemed, by all the leading authorities, to be the first actual Heavy Rollers event.

Nigel – get your word-processor out!

Postscript – Nigel got his word-processor out:

Guest Piece by Nigel Hinks: The Birth Of The Heavy Rollers Tradition, Edgbaston, June 1998, Including The Revelations And Acts That Led To The Birth

It’s hard to believe that the Heavy Rollers tradition will be quarter-of-a-century old this year, as I write in January 2023.

When I look at the names connected with the, for me, seminal summer of cricket that was 1998, I am still in touch with so many of them. Not just the Heavy Rollers, but also Kevin Parker and Ian Theodoreson who initiated the playing of cricket tradition that was later adopted even more wholeheartedly by the Children’s Society gang. Even Angus Fraser, who took the wicket that made me and Jeff leap. is still in my orbit, through my Middlesex and Lord’s activities.

I was so much older then, I’m younger than that now.

The Very First Z/Yen Charity Cricket Match, Barnardo’s, 22 July 1998

Quintessential Harris shot, late 1990s: the uppish leg-side hoick

Between 1984 and 1998 I pretty much didn’t play cricket at all. Perhaps the odd knock around when I was in my mid twenties, then there were the dog years of the early 1990s following my catastrophic back injury in the summer of 1990. After that, my cricket “career” was limited to a bit of watching and the odd umpiring stint…

…until the summer of 1998.

That summer, Z/Yen was still doing work with Barnardo’s and had also by then got heavily involved with The Children’s Society. Thus it transpired that our main client contacts, especially at the latter, were keen cricketers.

But the initial challenge came from Barnardo’s and I think it was Kevin Parker who initially picked up the challenge. The idea was promulgated with the blessing of Barnardo’s senior folk, Ian Theodoreson and Bob Harvey, but sadly not their presence.

So like buses, no cricket for years and then two matches came along in a row. The first of them was just Z/Yen and Barnardo’s.

Z/Yen – a tiny company with about 10 employees in those days. Barnardo’s employed several thousand people, a great many of whom worked at the Barkingside campus.

Barnardo’s had quite a lot of people who knew what they were doing for a cricket match…

One of the Barnardo’s IT team, if I recall correctly

…whereas Z/Yen didn’t. I press-ganged a few likely folk and we tried our best against adversity, but adversity…by which I mean Barnardo’s…were destined to win.

By the time we got to this first match, I think that the plans for a second match, which ended up including people from The Children’s Society, were already in place, so I think we all saw this first one as a bit of a warm up.

But Micky’s one and only experience of cricket had very little to do with warm up. Micky is from Belgium and fancied having a go. He’s that sort of “have a go” chap. Back in 1998, he wasn’t exactly displacing a queue of Z/Yen people who wanted to play…

…let’s be honest about this, we were struggling to get a team together; hence the cunning plan to bring in The Children’s Society enthusiasts for the next one.

I look on this match as being an early example of me encouraging diversity and increasing cricket participation in London’s Parks…

…anyway, Micky turned up and tried to look the part:

Which way round should I hold this bat?

We fielded first.

Not having learnt from my own experience grazing in the long grass 16 years earlier in a Keele Festival Week match…

“Got Roped In To Playing Cricket All Afternoon”, Gentlemen v Players Cricket Match, Keele Festival Week, 24 June 1982

…I thought Micky might be safest patrolling the boundary.

But Micky did no warming up or keeping warm exercise ahead of the ball coming vaguely in his direction about 20-30 minutes into the match. He set off enthusiastically around the outfield only to pull up with a hamstring tear some 10 yards shy of the ball.

So when it was Z/Yen’s turn to bat, we not only had to explain the way batting works to Micky, we also had to provide him with a runner and explain how that arcane aspect of the laws of cricket works too.

Not ideal.

Yet still a good time was being had by all.

My other very clear memory is my own experience batting in partnership with a gentleman named Nigel. He was Karen Moore’s partner or husband, so qualified to play for Z/Yen on those grounds. He might otherwise have seemed like a ringer.

Nigel was no cricketer but he was a fitness instructor and had a Mr Motivator manner and clearly was a talented all-round sportsman.

I was scratching away, barely able to put bat on ball…

…well I hadn’t played for 14 years or so…

…until Nigel came to the crease, only to start whacking the ball using just hand-eye and natural talent.

Come on Ian, you can do it…

…Nigel hollered encouragingly and convincingly from the non-strikers end. And strangely, feeding off Nigel’s ill-founded confidence in me and the freedom that added to my game, I started to score some runs and contribute well to our partnership.

OK, we couldn’t turn the game around, but we had a decent knock – perhaps I put on 10-12 – which I remember making me feel well chuffed.

I think the match took place near Barkingside – I think Fairlop – perhaps Old Parkonians – my diary is silent on detail.

Postscript: my memory has served me well. I wrote this up for Now & Z/Yen at the time thusly:

The Sound Of Leather On Willow

Z/Yen defied all the spread bets by coming a close second in a cricket competition in late July, against Barnardo’s, at Fairlop. Z/Yen highlights included Jane Beazley taking a wicket, Michael Mainelli scoring 16 runs “baseball style”, Michel Einhorn pulling a hamstring and a stunning undefeated partnership of 36 runs in three overs between Ian Harris and Nigel Moore.

None of these stunts were enough to prevent Barnardo’s from deservedly winning by 23 runs. Unlike our good friends at Barnardo’s, Z/Yen took the obvious precaution of bringing some children along with us, only one of whom succeeded in getting a black eye trying to retrieve the ball. It was an amazing summer evening, which showed the weather characteristics of spring, autumn and winter during the two hours of play. The weather improved once we retired to the sports centre for beer and cake. Watch out for the next similar event; it was a smashing evening.

The full stack of pictures (from both matches) might help savvy locals to work it out:

Cricket_1998 (1)

Windows, A Lyric For Charles And Mike, 29 June 1998

Image produced in collaboration with Dall-E

In honour of Charley “The Gent Malloy” Bartlett’s impending visit to Lord’s today (as I write on 21 April 2017) I was reminded of the following lyric.

It is one of the very last I wrote using Amipro and therefore part of the batch I am trying to rescue onto Ogblog before my old computer passes away…

…and the subject matter, ironically, is IT. I wrote this (and several others for The Children’s Society Windows Rollout team) ahead of a team end of project session at Wadderton.

The project parodied in the song was sensibly written up in a seminal piece by me and Charles for the charity press (NGO Finance) a few months later – click here if you want to know about it.

Charles likes a bit of metal – both the IT and musical variety, so the choice of tune was, I think, a good one. I wonder what Charles will think of this well-geeky lyric nearly 20 years on?

PLANNING A ROLLOUT OF WINDOWS
(Epic To the Tune of “Stairway To Heaven”)
VERSE 1

There’s a fellow whose mode-,
-em is not Dacom Gold,
And the name of that bloke is Charles Bartlett;
When he breaks wind you’ll know,
As the windows are closed,
If that noise was a burp or a fartlett.
Mmmmmmmm, mmmmmmmmm,
And he’s planning a rollout of Windows.

VERSE 2

There’s a sign on the door,
Cos he wants to be sure,
And the sign reads “IT room, no entry”;
I suspect that the room’s,
Got NS Optimum’s,
Entire stock ’til the end of the century.
Ooooooooooh, it makes me wonder.
Ooooooooooh, it makes me wonder.

VERSE 3

There’s a feeling I get,
When I call the helpdesk,
That they and Z/Yen are drinking Bacardi;
I get fine, rum advice,
‘Tho’ they ask in a trice,
Tony Duggan or Michael Bernardi.
Ooooooooooh, it makes me wonder.
Ooooooooooh, and it makes me wonder.

VERSE 4

And it’s whispered that soon,
Yes by the end of June,
TCS will have rolled out completely;
ITSOs and Marion,
Will still carry on,
FMI Windows training discretely.

VERSE 5

If there’s a gremlin in your Windows,
Don’t be alarmed now,
It’s just a browser from Bill Gates;
Yes there are two paths you can go by,
But in the long run,
He’ll make you buy Windows 98.
Ooooooooh, that’s how he’s made his fortune.

VERSE 6

Your modem’s humming but you don’t know,
Because it’s so slow,
If you’ve got e-mail or been forsook;
Perhaps the server’s full of e-trash,
Or had a head crash,
Or just can’t load Microsoft Outlook.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh

(AIR GUITAR BREAK)

VERSE 7

Charles and Mike Smith have bought the road,
I’m talking Tottenham Court Road;
Up walks the lady we all know (“watcha Mangal”),
Whose eyes light up to say “hello,
What have you guys bought from the stores?
We have to budget very hard,
None of that corporate charge card,
This recent rollout really shows, (yeh)
That Windows costs a lot of dough.”

OUTRO – MIKE AND CHARLES’ REPLY

“We were buying some spares and cheap modems”.

Here is Led Zeppelin singing Stairway To Heaven with the lyrics shown on screen. I can do a passable Stairway on the baritone ukulele, btw, but I’m not expecting Chas to ask for a performance. Mike Smith, on the other hand, might insist upon it…

Reflections On The Day England U19s Won The Cricket World Cup In South Africa, 1 February 1998

I am writing in January 2020, on the day the U19 Cricket World Cup in South Africa is starting.

Last time the U19 Cricket World Cup was in South Africa was early 1998. That was also the last time (and so far the only time) that England won the U19 World Cup.

Here is a link to the scorecard of the final, in which England beat New Zealand.

My friends over at King Cricket will be delighted to see Rob Key’s name on that scorecard.

Rob Key is “a thing” on King Cricket:

Rob Key

Rob Key had a fine tournament, although not such a magnificent final.

It was Stephen Peters who topped the scoring/batting averages for England in that tournament and who scored the “man of the match ton” in the final.

It turns out that Peters was Essex in those days and hails from Harold Wood – Charley “The Gent” Malloy territory.

That thought made me realise that, in February 1998, I had only recently met Charles through our work at The Children’s Society and I had neither met Nigel “Father Barry” nor “Big Papa Zambesi” Jeff…yet. At that juncture, Charles was working mainly with Mike Smith. Coincidentally, Janie and I spent the evening with Mike and Marianna less than two weeks ago as I write:

A Gentle Start To 2020, Including Music & Food With The Smiths & The Neighbours, Early January 2020

It wasn’t until that summer, 1998, by which time I was also working with Nigel and Jeff, that I learnt that Chas, Nigel, Jeff…they all had a passion for cricket.

It must have been July, that topsy-turvy 1998 test series between England & South Africa was well under way. Jeff and I were going to visit a project in Mitcham – I had arranged to drive over to Clerkenwell, meet to plan the visit and then drive Jeff out to Mitcham.

When we got to the car, I tentatively asked Jeff if he would mind if I put the test match on the radio while we drove out there. Jeff’s trademark big beaming smile appeared on his face and he said,

I’d been trying to work out how to phrase that question politely to you…

…we listened all the way to the project (while also discussing cricket of course) and then again when we left the project. I arranged to drop Jeff at one of the Northern Line Tootings or Balham before I went on to see my folks.

It was a very hot late afternoon and I took the roof off Nobby – one of the very few times I did that. Big Papa Zambesi Jeff must have been grateful for the extra head room in a topless Nobby (as it were).

Janie, with Nobby, at his last resting place

I recall England taking a wicket when we were stopped at traffic lights somewhere around Tooting and we must have looked a right pair of charlies in that car leaping for joy at an announcement on the radio.

But returning to the U19 World Cup Final match on 1 February 1998, I realise that Nobby was just a twinkle in my and Janie’s eyes on that day. I think we had seen Mack the day before that final and arranged to buy Nobby. The deal was done the following Saturday…

…and I think it was the Saturday after that, in deep midwinter, that Janie and I visited the Mainellis in Nobby to see their newborn baby, Xenia, at the end of which Rupert Stubbs and the other visitors insisted on seeing us drive off with Nobby’s roof off. We drove round the corner, put the roof back on and tried to stop shivering all the way home.

I was trying to recall how I followed the tournament and that 1 February 1998 match.

To some extent, I think

No on-line all the time Cricinfo in those days. Ceefax was the only source of constantly updating cricket scores.

But I think also, in those days, Janie and I could hear sky commentary on her Videotron cable TV arrangement. She didn’t have the additional Sky sports subscription in those days – most of the cricket was terrestrial, free-to-air, but the scrambled channels, such as the sports ones, had sound all the time with the picture scrambled. I have a feeling we followed bits of that final that way.

But my main reflections are of how long ago all of that was and the journey I have shared with so many of those characters over the decades…

…and of the cricket careers that have come and gone for those (then) youngsters who fought that final. Most of the finalists went on to professional careers, many international ones. Some glorious, some less than glorious, but all interesting.

Here’s that U19 World Cup Final 1998 scorecard again.

A “Works Outing” To Remember, From Detroit To Fung Shing Via Scissor Happy At The Duchess Theatre, 12 December 1997

One of the more memorable Z/Yen Christmas outings, this one.

In an attempt to start to big-up the event, we tried a west end evening, with bar drinks, theatre visit and dinner in a private room.

Perhaps the bar bit was not a great idea ahead of a silly play, Scissor Happy, that was relying on audience participation for laughs.

Anyway, we started in Detroit – by which I mean the bar in Seven Dials, long since defunct as I write 25 years later – not the City in Michigan, obviously.

Then we went to see Scissor Happy at The Duchess Theatre. I wrote the following in my theatre log:

Works outing for Z/Yen – went very well.

Michael Moore’s drunken interventions were especially memorable.

Michael was the husband of one of our employees – Rachel. He was significantly older than her, indeed older than the rest of us. At first his audience interventions went down well with cast and audience, but he got carried away and for a while seemed to think that he WAS the show.

I remember several of our number being embarrassed about this – not least Rachel – although I also recall hearing on exit other audience members debating whether that funny old geezer was a plant from the show or really a member of the audience.

The Fung Shing meal was excellent in out private room. At that time Fung Shing was, in my opinion, the best restaurant in Chinatown. Writing 25 years later, it is another long-since defunct place, sadly.

Returning to Scissor Happy, though – I wonder what made us chose that play? Some sort of lowest common denominator thinking? Or perhaps it came recommended by someone…certainly not me! Not my sort of play at all.

Nor Nicholas de Jongh’s, who described it as “piffle” in the Standard:

23 Oct 1997, Thu Evening Standard (London, Greater London, England) Newspapers.com

Strangely, Charles Spencer in The Telegraph rather liked it, while admitting “it depends who is in the audience”. Too right!

24 Oct 1997, Fri The Daily Telegraph (London, Greater London, England) Newspapers.com

Beef On The Bone Risk Compared With Christmas Risk, Z/Yen Public Relations Stunt, 5 December 1997

A government ban on the sale of beef-on-the-bone, in late 1997, was very unpopular. The worry was “Mad Cow Disease” or variant Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease in humans, although the connection and risks seemed very low to many of us.

I wrote a tongue-in-cheek press release for Z/Yen, which you can read by clicking here…

…or, if by chance the Z/Yen archive goes awry before Ogblog does, I have scraped that piece to here.

In truth, it was written more as a personal rant and internal Z/Yen team joke for Christmas that year than anything that I thought might really generate press, but strangely the Daily Telegraph picked up on it, called me for a chat about it and then published this piece – extracted onto the then nascent Z/Yen web site here...

…or, if by chance the Z/Yen archive goes awry before Ogblog does, I have scraped that piece to here.

The beef-on-the-bone ban was lifted in time for Christmas (1999) – so never let it be said that I have no influence.

An Evening With Teresa Bestard, Bob Willis & Others, Albertine Wine Bar, 19 August 1997

I am writing this memory piece on 4 December 2019, having just learnt that the great fast bowler and latterly cricket pundit, Bob Willis, has died today.

I first met Bob Willis when I was but a boy, in 1977, at The Oval:

My First Ever Day At A Test Match, With Graham Majin, England v Australia Day 3, Oval, 27 August 1977

For those who cannot be bothered to click through, Graham and I really did meet Bob that day in 1977, down in the tube station, an hour or so after stumps, as we were all heading to different households in Streatham, in his case to visit friends on the test match rest day.

I doubt very much whether Bob recognised me 20 years later on our second encounter; on this occasion in the Albertine Wine Bar in Shepherd’s Bush.

Albertine was well trendy in 1997, picking up awards and being known as a place to celebrity spot – click here or image below for ES artcle/review:

Teresa Bestard was working with me on several projects with Broadcasting Support Services, who at that time were based in Shepherd’s Bush. I had arranged to meet Teresa and David Highton to go through stuff late afternoon/early evening and we agreed we’d have a drink after work together. Teresa chose Albertine because she wanted to celebrity spot.

The bar was not so crowded when we got there and Teresa was a little disappointed not to recognise any celebrities in the bar.

The only person I recognised, on the far side of the bar, was Bob Willis. He was with two other people; one turned out to be the cricket journalist Michael Henderson, the other a mustachioed Aussie, who looked like a superannuated version of Merv Hughes but who was in fact a wine producer.

I told Teresa that a former great England cricketer was in the bar, which was celebrity enough for me. It was celebrity enough for David Highton too, who is/was a keen follower of cricket and indeed was a decent player in his own right when he turned out for the charity matches.

Teresa let it be known that former cricketers did not meet her stringent criteria for celebrity.

David didn’t hang around for very long.

Teresa asked me a bit more about Bob Willis. In the absence of any celebrities who met her stringent criteria, she suddenly promoted Bob to the “worth asking about” level.

I told her a little and suggested that she approach Bob and chat with him.

Teresa was not at all keen on that idea…

…until she progressed to a second glass of wine…

…when she asked again about this cricket business and that cricketer and I suggested that she approach Bob Willis with a greeting along the lines of…

…aren’t you Bob Willis, the great fast bowler and former England cricket captain…

…and take it from there.

So imagine the scene. Teresa Bestard, a pint-sized young woman with a big smile and a heavy Catalan accent, wanders to the other side of the bar, looks up to the relative giant, Bob Willis, presumably saying the above short speech.

I couldn’t hear from my distance, but I did see the astonished expression on Bob Willis’s face and gales of laughter from the group.

Teresa was then chatting with them for a short while, before Michael Henderson came over to me.

You set that up, didn’t you?…

..said Henderson…

…that was really funny. Is she your girlfriend?

No, I said, Teresa’s a work colleague.

Well, anyway, she’s perfectly safe with those two.

Henderson and I chatted a while, which is how I found out, amongst other things, that “Merv Senior” was a wine producer.

Soon enough, Bob, “Merv Senior” and Teresa came over to our table – I think the Bob Willis party had been on the verge of leaving when Teresa intervened with them, so all three of them made to leave.

Is this your girlfriend?…

…Bob Willis asked me, pointing to Teresa.

Oh no, blushed Teresa, you should meet his girlfriend Janie, she’s lovely!

Bob Willis turned to me, saluted me and said…

…mon capitaine…

…before all three of Bob’s party left us, with warm farewells.

Bob Willis.

A Crazy Fortnight, Then Up To Stratford-Upon-Avon, 6 to 18 April 1997

The Shakespeare Hotel by Rept0n1x, CC BY-SA 3.0

After our mega trip to the Middle East, our homecoming and then The Homecoming…

…the sort of fortnight that looks, twenty-five years later, like an utterly mad way to over-fill one’s diary and hare around the country like a mad thing.

A tour for Barnardo’s. with whom I was working quite a lot back then, took in Yorkshire, Wales and Barkingside in the space of a few days, interrupted only for some meetings with other clients and a foreshortened weekend which included dinner with Janie’s lovely neighbours, Hussein and Saji on the Saturday.

I guess the frantic aspect of the work was somewhat self-inflicted, as I had arranged a proper long weekend in Stratford only a couple of weeks after returning from a three-week holiday.

Our main purpose in Stratford was to take in a couple of plays, which I shall write up individually and separately. On this slightly extended visit I do recall also having the time to have a proper good wander around the town and take in some of the touristic sites we wouldn’t normally find time to see when visiting Stratford for the theatre.

Was I welcome in these places or was I Bard?

We stayed on until Tuesday 22 April and went to a Seder (perhaps at Jacquie’s, perhaps at Mum & Dad’s) the evening of our return.